La la la la La la la la
I feel like I'm in a chapter of Little House on the Prairie. Except without the locusts, little girls, and the whole set-way-back-when thing. Actually the only thing it has to do with Little House on the Prairie is that I'm on a farm.
Visiting my family in Virginia for Christmas. I've only been here a week and already the southern accent has crept back into my speech. Once a hick, always a hick, I guess.
Not going to go into the details, just the highlights of the season. The cows got out at least 3 times, and we had to go chase them down each time. Grandma told me they once got out at three in the morning and ate all the neighbor's bushes and flowers. Woot! Speaking of Grandma, she was telling me about this disgusting dog she just bought, which is supposed to be pomeranian or some shit and it turns out the stupid thing is half hound dog. I don't really care, since they all are the same breed of smelly to me. But she was pretty heated, and at one point said, "I oughta go take a crap on their doorstep!" Yay, Grandma!
Grandpa looked real good for a man who got run over by his own truck two months ago. He was more relaxed then I've ever seen him. When he saw Johnny's picture he offered to take the bull ring off the cow outside and put it in Johnny's nose. "I'll even do it for free." Still doesn't talk much though, and pretty much spent the whole time playing Vietnam games on his XBox. Yep, HIS XBox.
I slipped on the ice and fell on my back like one of those cartoon characters that slip on banana peels and go down like a ton of bricks, legs up in the air. Then smelly crap-on-their-doorstep hound dog came running up, stole the santa hat I was wearing while I was on the ground watching the little birds fly in a circle around my head, and took off with it into the woods. Sneaky little bastard.
But the oddest thing was my nine year old nephew Brennon telling me about soccer practice, where he got hit in the chest with the ball: "I was surprised the force of the ball was able to penetrate the high energy shield over my atmosphere!"
Gotta love the holidays!
Hope everyone has a great New Years!
Visiting my family in Virginia for Christmas. I've only been here a week and already the southern accent has crept back into my speech. Once a hick, always a hick, I guess.
Not going to go into the details, just the highlights of the season. The cows got out at least 3 times, and we had to go chase them down each time. Grandma told me they once got out at three in the morning and ate all the neighbor's bushes and flowers. Woot! Speaking of Grandma, she was telling me about this disgusting dog she just bought, which is supposed to be pomeranian or some shit and it turns out the stupid thing is half hound dog. I don't really care, since they all are the same breed of smelly to me. But she was pretty heated, and at one point said, "I oughta go take a crap on their doorstep!" Yay, Grandma!
Grandpa looked real good for a man who got run over by his own truck two months ago. He was more relaxed then I've ever seen him. When he saw Johnny's picture he offered to take the bull ring off the cow outside and put it in Johnny's nose. "I'll even do it for free." Still doesn't talk much though, and pretty much spent the whole time playing Vietnam games on his XBox. Yep, HIS XBox.
I slipped on the ice and fell on my back like one of those cartoon characters that slip on banana peels and go down like a ton of bricks, legs up in the air. Then smelly crap-on-their-doorstep hound dog came running up, stole the santa hat I was wearing while I was on the ground watching the little birds fly in a circle around my head, and took off with it into the woods. Sneaky little bastard.
But the oddest thing was my nine year old nephew Brennon telling me about soccer practice, where he got hit in the chest with the ball: "I was surprised the force of the ball was able to penetrate the high energy shield over my atmosphere!"
Gotta love the holidays!
Hope everyone has a great New Years!