Rape Isn't Funny

[growlingturtlez]

Could we please put a moratorium on phrases like "raep time" and "rape face" in capslock communities, lolcats, screen caps, whatevah? I see this all over the place in different online communities and forums.

Could we also do away with phrases like, "I was totally raped by that exam...," or "I totally raped your iTunes music folder...," etc, etc?? I

Comments

[pellimusprime]

xD' Murder isn't funny either, but people throw around "Oh you are so dead" and "I'ma kill you for that one!" all the time.
I know how horrid rape is, but... there are better things to fight for than someone using the word "rape" in a joke. :\ I think.

But it's a difference of opinion, and everybody's entitled to that. -3-

[growlingturtlez]

I agree with you on the murder thing, and people using it in jest. But the thing about using the word "rape" in jest is that it exists alongside the larger problem of rape culture, which includes rape jokes.

So...I'm not focusing on the use of phrases such as "rape time" or "rape face" as the main problem, but as a symptom of the larger problem, which is rape culture.

[freerange_snark]

there are better things to fight for than [fill in the blank]

This is a false dichotomy that people set up a lot: If you're doing something about X, you must not be doing enough about Y. But humans have an essentially depthless capacity for caring, and can do many different things in a day, a week, a month, a year, a lifetime. Just because growlingturtlez is fighting the watering-down of the word "rape" doesn't mean she's not also rallying against Prop 8, donating to a Hatian relief fund, and pressuring her representatives to pass better carbon emissions regulations. These things are all important and all deserve our attention.

And what's more, there's nothing you can't use the "there's better things to fight about" argument for. Even if you're talking about climate change, which literally has the potential to be the end of the world, there's always something more immediate. And if you're talking about something immediate, like aiding refugees or alleviating hunger, there's always something bigger, like global warming. If a statement can't be made

[pellimusprime]

... All righty then.

I'll have to disagree with you. I wasn't using the term "there's better things to fight for" as a way to overthrow her argument, merely stating that trying to stop the use of a single word is a fight that CANNOT be won, and is, usually, a waste of time. And she isn't so much fighting it as stating her opinion - the same thing I did.

I said that, because that's what I believe. Not because I was hoping to cheapen an argument or anything of the sort. And really I think the only thing you've managed to do is blow the entire comment out of proportion.

[freerange_snark]

I'm not trying to make any statements about your intentions. My point is just that the construction "there's more important things to fight for/talk about" is a) inherently useless--it's a logical tautology--and b) fundamentally dismissive--there's no constructive reply to it. It's also very different from saying something like, "I think is issue is too trivial to be concerned with," which allows for a constructive argument for the subject's importance, or "I think this is a fight we can't win," which is a reasonable opinion and clearly states your objection to the topic.

So since you probably don't want to come off as vague and condescending, when you find yourself using that phrase, you might want to stop for a moment and find a more precise way to convey what you're thinking.

[pellimusprime]

If we're going to mention condescension, I believe you should take a look at your own comments before attacking mine.

You obviously have a point to make, one that I can see, but your method of presenting it leaves you seeming rude and abrasive, and as the recipient of your comment, I feel more assaulted than challenged. If you feel you have an important point to make, try being civil rather than snappish, especially when the conversation into which you wish to interject did not involve you to begin with.

And since I'm hoping it is not your intention to come off as rude and self-important, you might want to pause for a time and think of a more polite way to state your opinion. -_-