Nature is evil.
So there I was, in the shower, shaving the areas around my cock and balls, when I look up and see this astonishing spectacle. A butterfly, with blue velvet wings and a whisper of shimmering orange on the edges, fluttering right outside my bathtub window. I truly felt it was looking at me, and I instantly understood the miracle of life as my mind drifted into a softer, gentler world....and then, "ouch", I nicked myself. I threw my loofah at the window, and the evil insect fluttered away, no doubt laughing, never to be seen again.In summation, I would just like to say, "Fuck you nature, don't hypnotize me with your beauty while I'm shaving my balls."