Angry
So it's probably stupid and not worth the energy I have expended on it. But it's like I can't just put it out of my mind.
I have a friend that sometimes I have to be onstage with. When we get up there, and she starts getting stressed out or things aren't the way she wants, she starts lashing out. The guys just ignore her or don't let it get to them. When she snaps at me, I get mad.
And I get frustrated, because I am tired of getting treated badly because someone else is having a hard time. It causes strain between us, and I have even said something to her about it a couple of times, despite that being conflict, which I have been taught to avoid at all costs.
She blames me for not having enough grace with her. And I'm tired of dealing with it in general. I don't have the energy in my life to deal with this. It makes doing one of the things I love the most not fun for me. It puts strain on my heart and mind.
I feel like saying something to her when she is being that way is truly more loving than simply taking whatever she dishes out when she's misbehaving. And I have talked to other people present at the time, and they felt I was not in the wrong.
And now, 2 weeks later, it gets drug up again. I don't really feel like going back for round 2, when I really don't feel like I was doing anything wrong. Maybe I'm snobby because I don't think a backup singer should be demanding. Having been one, I was always grateful when I could hear anything, instead of demanding certain people stand in certain places because I had to hear out of both monitors.
I'm angry, and really don't want any more to do with this whole mess. And I really don't want to be onstage with her anymore. Not sure what to do about it...
I have a friend that sometimes I have to be onstage with. When we get up there, and she starts getting stressed out or things aren't the way she wants, she starts lashing out. The guys just ignore her or don't let it get to them. When she snaps at me, I get mad.
And I get frustrated, because I am tired of getting treated badly because someone else is having a hard time. It causes strain between us, and I have even said something to her about it a couple of times, despite that being conflict, which I have been taught to avoid at all costs.
She blames me for not having enough grace with her. And I'm tired of dealing with it in general. I don't have the energy in my life to deal with this. It makes doing one of the things I love the most not fun for me. It puts strain on my heart and mind.
I feel like saying something to her when she is being that way is truly more loving than simply taking whatever she dishes out when she's misbehaving. And I have talked to other people present at the time, and they felt I was not in the wrong.
And now, 2 weeks later, it gets drug up again. I don't really feel like going back for round 2, when I really don't feel like I was doing anything wrong. Maybe I'm snobby because I don't think a backup singer should be demanding. Having been one, I was always grateful when I could hear anything, instead of demanding certain people stand in certain places because I had to hear out of both monitors.
I'm angry, and really don't want any more to do with this whole mess. And I really don't want to be onstage with her anymore. Not sure what to do about it...