(no subject)
damn its been a long time since i've been on here. I'm in beautiful (disgusting) oklahoma city. I just lost in the first round. It fucking sucks to lose. its so hard being here. traveling puts me so far out of my comfort zone. it is so hard on me. mentally it takes so much out of me. I feel like I'm in middle school again. all of the girls kinda have their own groups of friends and they train together and I just don't know anyone, and if you know me you know I have a pretty hard time in social situations. and most of these girls are as socially retarded as I am.. eh it sucks.
but yesterday I met a nice girl who is probably a dyke and she was cool and I thought we could probably be friends since we'll be in all the same places this summer. anyway, the luck of the draw put us together and she kicked my ass. :(
did not feel good but she's a really good player and I hope she does well.
this shit is so hard. I mean this is totally natural and expected but its hard. its weird and heartbreaking.. every time I lose it kinda kills me. especially when I know that it was my mind that was holding me back. my lack of confidence.. hopefully that will come with time. hopefully. I just gotta get my act together.
I stopped working with eric last week. long story. it was not working out and I just got sick of his shit. thinking of training out of boston and tampa this summer. we'll see. I need to figure everything out this week. haha so much fun.
but yesterday I met a nice girl who is probably a dyke and she was cool and I thought we could probably be friends since we'll be in all the same places this summer. anyway, the luck of the draw put us together and she kicked my ass. :(
did not feel good but she's a really good player and I hope she does well.
this shit is so hard. I mean this is totally natural and expected but its hard. its weird and heartbreaking.. every time I lose it kinda kills me. especially when I know that it was my mind that was holding me back. my lack of confidence.. hopefully that will come with time. hopefully. I just gotta get my act together.
I stopped working with eric last week. long story. it was not working out and I just got sick of his shit. thinking of training out of boston and tampa this summer. we'll see. I need to figure everything out this week. haha so much fun.