(no subject)
I havent updated this thing in forever. Well lets see here...Christmas has come and gone and well, it was good but I just wasnt in the Christmas spirit this year. I dont know why but I wasnt. I didnt even buy anyone presents, just Josh B. My grandma has been here for almost 2 weeks and it has been good. I havent seen her in 5 years or so. She leaves Saturday and then I probably wont see her again for another 4 or 5 years. Carla comes out here Tuesday and I am beyond thrilled. That is one girl that I love to death, would do anything for and she knows me and understands me and that is what I need right now. Some of my friends ( not naming names) just arent what they used to be and I hate it. I feel so alone in the cruel world. So alone and it sucks. I wish Josh B was here, I really do. I wish I could sit him down right in front of me right now and just spill my heart out to him. I totally understand that he doesnt want to listen to be and hear all of how I feel about him while he's in Iraq but I wish he did. I wish I could get it through his head how much I really do love him, want to be with him and am willing to do anything to make that happen. I just dont want him to come back here and decide that Stacey or Jesse living 2000 miles away is a better choice. Who knows...all I know is that I miss him like crazy and that 9 weeks cant come fast enough. Its hard to think that he's been gone almost 19. Crazy huh? Well I must go to sleep now. I hope New Years just passes me up, my plans are to do nothing since my friend ditched me...oh well, shit happens right? Boyfriends are more important anyways. Have a safe New Years...
Richelle