(no subject)
Silence.
Finally.
I siged with relief as i enjoyed the break in her screaming and constant thumping, although it was short lived. I felt terrible about it, but it was the only way she would consent. Well, i guess "consent" isn't the right word, considering she was tied up in the trunk of my car. The GHB hadn't lasted as long as mario had said it would and sometime about a half hour into our drive she woke up and hasn't shut up since. in annoyance i turned up the radio to drown her out.
it was dark at the lake at night. you would think such a statement would be obvious but I grew up in the city so the blackness of the night with no streetlights always surprised me a little.
i drove the 6 mile stretch around the perimeter of the lake a few times, just in case she could somehow orient where we were. When i was satisfied, i pulled into a small isolated clearing and shut the car off.
She was silent and i thought to myself that she must be very afraid. the guilt in my chest was unbearable for a time and i chose to sit for a moment to collect my racing thoughts.
It was all because of that damned book. It made me see things. want things. I had no inborn desire to drug and tie up a girl then throw her in the trunk of my car - much less one i was in love with. or at least thought i was in love with. it's so jumbled now, and it hurts me to think that i may never know how deep my feelings for her might have been or if they were mutual.
i got out of the car and looked around to be sure i . . . we. . . were alone. she started her screaming again and continued until i opened the trunk. there she lay, in shorts and a t-shirt - the clothes i had found her in when i slipped through her bedroom window. i had covered her head with a black hood tied at the neck and bound her hands and feet behind her with a zip tie. i had lined the trunk with blankets and pillows so the ride wouldn't hurt her and she would be a little more comfortable, and as she writhed and squirmed against her bondage i realized how ridiculous it was to expect some form of small grattitude for that action.
"will you please relax," i said
she froze in place and i could see all her muscles tense.
"Brian?" she stuttered.
God, how could i have been so stupid? of course she would recognize my voice. I cursed to myself and then sighed, admitting defeat.
I untied and removed the hood from her head as i replied, "yes sweetie, but not for long. I'm sorry."
she squirmed harder against her tied hands as tears came flooding to her eyes. She was a fighter, always had been. I cupped my hands together over my mouth in shock and fear of what was to come that night, and the realization that she would fight as hard as she could to the very end.
"nyarlathotep, grant me strength" i said softly to myself so that she wouldn't hear.
i went to the side of the car and pulled a small cart from the back seat. it resemebled the red rider wagons that children play with, however it was more industrialized with bigger wheels and just enough room to carry a petite body. i did my best to ignore her pleas as i transfered her writhing body from trunk to cart and wheeled her into the woods.
Finally.
I siged with relief as i enjoyed the break in her screaming and constant thumping, although it was short lived. I felt terrible about it, but it was the only way she would consent. Well, i guess "consent" isn't the right word, considering she was tied up in the trunk of my car. The GHB hadn't lasted as long as mario had said it would and sometime about a half hour into our drive she woke up and hasn't shut up since. in annoyance i turned up the radio to drown her out.
it was dark at the lake at night. you would think such a statement would be obvious but I grew up in the city so the blackness of the night with no streetlights always surprised me a little.
i drove the 6 mile stretch around the perimeter of the lake a few times, just in case she could somehow orient where we were. When i was satisfied, i pulled into a small isolated clearing and shut the car off.
She was silent and i thought to myself that she must be very afraid. the guilt in my chest was unbearable for a time and i chose to sit for a moment to collect my racing thoughts.
It was all because of that damned book. It made me see things. want things. I had no inborn desire to drug and tie up a girl then throw her in the trunk of my car - much less one i was in love with. or at least thought i was in love with. it's so jumbled now, and it hurts me to think that i may never know how deep my feelings for her might have been or if they were mutual.
i got out of the car and looked around to be sure i . . . we. . . were alone. she started her screaming again and continued until i opened the trunk. there she lay, in shorts and a t-shirt - the clothes i had found her in when i slipped through her bedroom window. i had covered her head with a black hood tied at the neck and bound her hands and feet behind her with a zip tie. i had lined the trunk with blankets and pillows so the ride wouldn't hurt her and she would be a little more comfortable, and as she writhed and squirmed against her bondage i realized how ridiculous it was to expect some form of small grattitude for that action.
"will you please relax," i said
she froze in place and i could see all her muscles tense.
"Brian?" she stuttered.
God, how could i have been so stupid? of course she would recognize my voice. I cursed to myself and then sighed, admitting defeat.
I untied and removed the hood from her head as i replied, "yes sweetie, but not for long. I'm sorry."
she squirmed harder against her tied hands as tears came flooding to her eyes. She was a fighter, always had been. I cupped my hands together over my mouth in shock and fear of what was to come that night, and the realization that she would fight as hard as she could to the very end.
"nyarlathotep, grant me strength" i said softly to myself so that she wouldn't hear.
i went to the side of the car and pulled a small cart from the back seat. it resemebled the red rider wagons that children play with, however it was more industrialized with bigger wheels and just enough room to carry a petite body. i did my best to ignore her pleas as i transfered her writhing body from trunk to cart and wheeled her into the woods.