Shit's getting crazy for me...and it's still January...or is it?
So the year is getting off to a surreal start...and it's only January. So let me brainstorm through everything that I can think of....
...I'm still bleeding from last year...
...I have kinda re-established contact with Pagina...
...I've made a decision to be more involed in SPC more than ever by joining the Comedy Club...
...I've been having this crush on this girl that I know from my Chemistry class back in my first semester at FIU...
...I've re-established contact with this girl that I know way back from Goleman...and have been having a crush on her...
...I have badass classes...
...I am trying to reconcile with the German Melanie, but we're a long way from that after what happened at the end of November, which I still wish hadn't happened...
...I still have that jealousy in me...
THERE! That's it! JEALOUSY is the word! Now why is that? Because of certain people. For example, remember that guy from SPC that I told you about...the one that got much more adoration from his clubmates at the SPC Holiday Social than me? The one that's as obsessed with Star Wars as I am? The one that got luckier than me when there was dancing? Yea that guy. The one that got a lot of adoration from almost everyone in the house when he said his signature catchphrase "YEEEAAAH!" (He says it while he slowly raises his fist in the air with a lot of strength.). Yes, that dumbass. (I still hope to God that I'm not the only one in the club who's annoyed at him.) Well, I still have jealousy towards him. It looks like everyone in the club loves him a lot. He's shown his intense love for Star Wars and a bunch of other things that nerds would love, and his clubmates love him for that. THat's why he's so popular with people in the club. He's been around since July, and he's already getting this popularity as if he's been around for a long time. I don't get it. It's people like him that make me feel miserable, and that make me question to myself, "What does he have that makes him more popular than me?" I'm a big fan of Star Wars, but I don't go around quoting Star Wars all the time at SPC. The same goes for Grand Theft Auto and South Park and a bunch of other things. I've learend from high school that if I do this a lot, then people will find me annoying. Well, he's doing this a lot, but I have yet to talk to more than one person who thinks of him as annoying. Heck, you know what, I might start quoting from Grand Theft Auto and South Park and whatever stuff I like. If that jerk is going to do what he does to be popular, then I'm doing the same thing, because there's no way in Hell that I'm going to let someone like him make me feel like crap. Heck, I'm afraid that if we were at some other party, and I danced with these girls, then when he starts dancing with them, the girls will go wild for him, just like everyone else. THAT pisses me off. If I'm going for this girl, and he meets her and he starts hitting on her, I'm not going to like that. It could get worse if they hooked up.
The same thing goes for any girl that I like, and for anyone that I know that attempts to go for whichever girl that I like. Yes, you could consider me paranoid. Many people have told me to stop it with trying to find a girlfriend, but guys my age most likely have girlfriends. I know a lot of guys my age that have girlfriends already. So if that's the case, then why can't I have a girlfriend? My friend Jose has one, and my friend Rick has one. So why the fuck can't I have a girlfriend?
A lot of you people reading my livejournal entries think of me as creepy for what I write. If I didn't write what I've written so far on my journal and kept on keeping it in my system for a long time, then it's going to kill me...LITERALLY. At least I didn't get this out of my system by going on a rampage of sorts or stabbing someone or shooting someone or whatever, so you'd better thank God or whoever your deity is for that. Yes, I have written about torturing the people that I hate, but don't most of you have those feelings? You might have those feelings, but you'll most likely not do anything to satiate those feelings in the end. The same thing goes for me; I might have these masochistic feelings, but I end up not doing anything in the end. (That's not to say that if you tried to harm me physically, I'm not going to do anything; I will strike back. The only exception is when you're hitting me based on a mistake or accident or mistaken indentity or the like.)
I have a feeling that my Livejournal could cost me my membership in SPC and other clubs...and maybe my job...and maybe my enrollment at FIU. Now I understand why this could happen, because many people find what I write to be creepy and such; but I find it ridiculous. I haven't used my Livejournal to make a hitlist of people that I want to kill---not that I'm going to kill anyone; I'm not that type of person. I haven't made an outline of some attack that I'm going to launch on some place. What I've only done is express my feelings and thoughts about certain things, but it doesn't mean that I'm going to go on the physical offensive. (Read the ending of my previous paragraph.) However, if my Livejournal costs me things such as my membership at SPC, then so be it. They're just being ridiculous. I have a right to be jealous the way I'm jealous now. I have a God-given right to free speech, but I also know that I have to use that right responsibly. I HAVE used that right in that way by not threatening to kill anyone and stuff like that. (Again, read my previous paragraph.) Is the worst yet to come? I pray to God---No.
...I'm still bleeding from last year...
...I have kinda re-established contact with Pagina...
...I've made a decision to be more involed in SPC more than ever by joining the Comedy Club...
...I've been having this crush on this girl that I know from my Chemistry class back in my first semester at FIU...
...I've re-established contact with this girl that I know way back from Goleman...and have been having a crush on her...
...I have badass classes...
...I am trying to reconcile with the German Melanie, but we're a long way from that after what happened at the end of November, which I still wish hadn't happened...
...I still have that jealousy in me...
THERE! That's it! JEALOUSY is the word! Now why is that? Because of certain people. For example, remember that guy from SPC that I told you about...the one that got much more adoration from his clubmates at the SPC Holiday Social than me? The one that's as obsessed with Star Wars as I am? The one that got luckier than me when there was dancing? Yea that guy. The one that got a lot of adoration from almost everyone in the house when he said his signature catchphrase "YEEEAAAH!" (He says it while he slowly raises his fist in the air with a lot of strength.). Yes, that dumbass. (I still hope to God that I'm not the only one in the club who's annoyed at him.) Well, I still have jealousy towards him. It looks like everyone in the club loves him a lot. He's shown his intense love for Star Wars and a bunch of other things that nerds would love, and his clubmates love him for that. THat's why he's so popular with people in the club. He's been around since July, and he's already getting this popularity as if he's been around for a long time. I don't get it. It's people like him that make me feel miserable, and that make me question to myself, "What does he have that makes him more popular than me?" I'm a big fan of Star Wars, but I don't go around quoting Star Wars all the time at SPC. The same goes for Grand Theft Auto and South Park and a bunch of other things. I've learend from high school that if I do this a lot, then people will find me annoying. Well, he's doing this a lot, but I have yet to talk to more than one person who thinks of him as annoying. Heck, you know what, I might start quoting from Grand Theft Auto and South Park and whatever stuff I like. If that jerk is going to do what he does to be popular, then I'm doing the same thing, because there's no way in Hell that I'm going to let someone like him make me feel like crap. Heck, I'm afraid that if we were at some other party, and I danced with these girls, then when he starts dancing with them, the girls will go wild for him, just like everyone else. THAT pisses me off. If I'm going for this girl, and he meets her and he starts hitting on her, I'm not going to like that. It could get worse if they hooked up.
The same thing goes for any girl that I like, and for anyone that I know that attempts to go for whichever girl that I like. Yes, you could consider me paranoid. Many people have told me to stop it with trying to find a girlfriend, but guys my age most likely have girlfriends. I know a lot of guys my age that have girlfriends already. So if that's the case, then why can't I have a girlfriend? My friend Jose has one, and my friend Rick has one. So why the fuck can't I have a girlfriend?
A lot of you people reading my livejournal entries think of me as creepy for what I write. If I didn't write what I've written so far on my journal and kept on keeping it in my system for a long time, then it's going to kill me...LITERALLY. At least I didn't get this out of my system by going on a rampage of sorts or stabbing someone or shooting someone or whatever, so you'd better thank God or whoever your deity is for that. Yes, I have written about torturing the people that I hate, but don't most of you have those feelings? You might have those feelings, but you'll most likely not do anything to satiate those feelings in the end. The same thing goes for me; I might have these masochistic feelings, but I end up not doing anything in the end. (That's not to say that if you tried to harm me physically, I'm not going to do anything; I will strike back. The only exception is when you're hitting me based on a mistake or accident or mistaken indentity or the like.)
I have a feeling that my Livejournal could cost me my membership in SPC and other clubs...and maybe my job...and maybe my enrollment at FIU. Now I understand why this could happen, because many people find what I write to be creepy and such; but I find it ridiculous. I haven't used my Livejournal to make a hitlist of people that I want to kill---not that I'm going to kill anyone; I'm not that type of person. I haven't made an outline of some attack that I'm going to launch on some place. What I've only done is express my feelings and thoughts about certain things, but it doesn't mean that I'm going to go on the physical offensive. (Read the ending of my previous paragraph.) However, if my Livejournal costs me things such as my membership at SPC, then so be it. They're just being ridiculous. I have a right to be jealous the way I'm jealous now. I have a God-given right to free speech, but I also know that I have to use that right responsibly. I HAVE used that right in that way by not threatening to kill anyone and stuff like that. (Again, read my previous paragraph.) Is the worst yet to come? I pray to God---No.