(no subject)
Things that are making my stomach feel really really horrible:
1. On Sunday, my brother called me lazy. My parents laughed it off. I volunteer, I work with disabled people, I Am Not Fucking Lazy. He maybe meant it as an innocent comment, but i'm so fucked off with him I can't even begin to describe it.
2. My parents don't get how much I love David. I want to stay at his. Mum won't let me. I should stand up to them and say "I'm 22. I am not a child. I AM going to stay at David's". I can't do that. Why? I don't know! I have a client that said to me today "My mum's got me wrapped around her finger and won't let me be independent. I don't want her to be like that" I looked at him and my heart sank, and I thought, "how can i Life Coach you to stand up to your parents when I can't myself?" I designed a tattoo that I really want and my dad won't let me get it. I AM TWENTY FUCKING TWO. I put myself out for so many peoople, and i never expect or want anyone to say thank you for it. the only, and i mean only, thing I do for myself is spend time with David. i don't ask for anything else, not even when it's my birhtday or christmas. and the only thing i really want right now, is to be at david's, and i can't even have that.
3. Gabriel called home today. I was out. Apparantly, he wanted to talk to me. Why didn't he call my mobile then? He spoke to my parents. I came home from David's and mum was all "ooooo you'll never guess who called?!" She had a huge happy face, I thought it was from the poetry competition. I couldn't help thinking she wouldn't be that happy if it was David that called.
4. Stainsby might not be happening. I'm meant to be going camping to a folk festival on the weekend of the 18th with Jamie and his kids, and David. Jamie can't afford it. I've just bought some fucking expensive wellies and colourful tights. if it doesn't happen, i want to spend the 4 days with david. that's going to be really hard.
5. my parents are having second thoughts about the house. them moving was my excuse to move in with david.
6. THE FUCKING WEATHER. we're in July goddamnit, why the fuck is it pissing it down?!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH.
i've never wanted to scream as much as i do now.
i'm not even upset. just really really angry at the universe and everything that comes with it.
1. On Sunday, my brother called me lazy. My parents laughed it off. I volunteer, I work with disabled people, I Am Not Fucking Lazy. He maybe meant it as an innocent comment, but i'm so fucked off with him I can't even begin to describe it.
2. My parents don't get how much I love David. I want to stay at his. Mum won't let me. I should stand up to them and say "I'm 22. I am not a child. I AM going to stay at David's". I can't do that. Why? I don't know! I have a client that said to me today "My mum's got me wrapped around her finger and won't let me be independent. I don't want her to be like that" I looked at him and my heart sank, and I thought, "how can i Life Coach you to stand up to your parents when I can't myself?" I designed a tattoo that I really want and my dad won't let me get it. I AM TWENTY FUCKING TWO. I put myself out for so many peoople, and i never expect or want anyone to say thank you for it. the only, and i mean only, thing I do for myself is spend time with David. i don't ask for anything else, not even when it's my birhtday or christmas. and the only thing i really want right now, is to be at david's, and i can't even have that.
3. Gabriel called home today. I was out. Apparantly, he wanted to talk to me. Why didn't he call my mobile then? He spoke to my parents. I came home from David's and mum was all "ooooo you'll never guess who called?!" She had a huge happy face, I thought it was from the poetry competition. I couldn't help thinking she wouldn't be that happy if it was David that called.
4. Stainsby might not be happening. I'm meant to be going camping to a folk festival on the weekend of the 18th with Jamie and his kids, and David. Jamie can't afford it. I've just bought some fucking expensive wellies and colourful tights. if it doesn't happen, i want to spend the 4 days with david. that's going to be really hard.
5. my parents are having second thoughts about the house. them moving was my excuse to move in with david.
6. THE FUCKING WEATHER. we're in July goddamnit, why the fuck is it pissing it down?!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH.
i've never wanted to scream as much as i do now.
i'm not even upset. just really really angry at the universe and everything that comes with it.