To My Fellow Fangirls

[greysaddictj]

After spending what was possibly one of the best weekends of my life in LA last weekend, I felt the need to write a little something.  I'm kind of shy and introverted, at least at first and in person.  It sometimes makes it hard to find like-minded people and close friends.  I've got my tightknit group of close friends, who I've known for over half my life.  However, even with them, I can't really be myself.  I can't gush about one of my favorite things - Grey's (and by extension Sara).  And while they may know I love Grey's, they don't know how I really feel, who my favorite couple is, or how Sara turns me into a puddle of goo.  I've lived my life as straight - and to some extent I am.  It was through Calzona and Sara that I realized that I was much more in the middle of the orientation spectrum than I'd thought.  Because frankly, Sara would not do the things she does to me if I were 100% straight.  But I can't talk about it with my friends and family.  At least not yet.  But when I'm with my fellow fangirls, I feel like I can be 100% me.  There are no facades, no walls, my guard can be down.   I just wanted to thank you for giving me that freedom, for letting me be me, the real me.  And for not judging.  I love you guys and miss you already!

Who knows, one day, I may meet my Callie or Arizona and I'll take the plunge and be the "real" me all the time.  Or maybe I'll meet my McDreamy instead. But until then, I know that I've got a great group of friends and I'm really thankful to have met you all.  Okay, done with my corny ramblings.  Back to the usual snarky, sarcastic, inappropriate me.

Love you guys!
-Jenny