In which Ava finds other ways to occupy herself.
“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”
The quote was displayed prominently on the door of her guidance counselor’s office, and while she approved of Mr. Higgins’ choice in inspirational speakers who have since moved on from this life, the quote wasn’t exactly doing anything for her at the moment. Maybe if it said “Wanting to be somewhere else is a waste of the place where you are,” maybe. That might make some sense to her. But right now, she was fine with who she was.
It was everything else that had to change.
She hated Indiana. Hated it with far more passion than she had expected. She didn’t want to be one of those bratty fifteen year-olds who threw tantrums at the idea of being transferred mid-year to a place she didn’t like. Especially the ones who had divorced parents and all the other ear markers for a troublesome teenager. She wasn’t troublesome. She wasn’t. She didn’t want to be a cliché. She was better than the cliché, as it were, but that didn’t stop her from hating Indiana any less.
She hated the lack of appreciation for the arts at the high school. She hated the fact that there wasn’t an arts school. She hated the fact that everyone here thought she was the weird artsy chick. She hated that she couldn’t fit in.
It was her second day at the school, and she still hadn’t found someone she could really click with. No one here was interested in music or art or theater. It was all football and sports and cars. Things that she could really care less about, and everyone seemed to be talking about them. She was so out of her element that she didn’t even know where to start. So there she was again, standing in the doorway of the cafeteria, looking for an empty seat at a table where she could sit down and talk to someone, but all she could find was nothingness. And above all else, she really hated that feeling.
However, unlike yesterday, she knew where she could hide.
Gripping her bagged lunch tighter in her hand, she turned out of the cafeteria and fled to the music room. She had choir there tenth period, and she knew that there was sound proof pianos, set off from the rest of the room. She glanced around for a bit, to make sure she was alone, before darting off to one of the cubicles and sitting down in front of the piano. She left the door open, just so that she could hear the bell, but otherwise she was confident that she was alone.
It was relatively easy to distract her when there was a piano in front of her. She pulled the iPod earbuds out from where she’d hidden them in her shirt, placing one in her ear and hitting play. One hand started to play what she already knew of the song she was trying to learn, while the other wandered into her lunch bag to find the apple she had packed for herself, bringing it to her lips and taking a bite. Provided she wasn’t disturbed-which she doubted she would be-she was quite happy to stay there for as long as necessary.
This was where she was meant to be-not anywhere else.
The quote was displayed prominently on the door of her guidance counselor’s office, and while she approved of Mr. Higgins’ choice in inspirational speakers who have since moved on from this life, the quote wasn’t exactly doing anything for her at the moment. Maybe if it said “Wanting to be somewhere else is a waste of the place where you are,” maybe. That might make some sense to her. But right now, she was fine with who she was.
It was everything else that had to change.
She hated Indiana. Hated it with far more passion than she had expected. She didn’t want to be one of those bratty fifteen year-olds who threw tantrums at the idea of being transferred mid-year to a place she didn’t like. Especially the ones who had divorced parents and all the other ear markers for a troublesome teenager. She wasn’t troublesome. She wasn’t. She didn’t want to be a cliché. She was better than the cliché, as it were, but that didn’t stop her from hating Indiana any less.
She hated the lack of appreciation for the arts at the high school. She hated the fact that there wasn’t an arts school. She hated the fact that everyone here thought she was the weird artsy chick. She hated that she couldn’t fit in.
It was her second day at the school, and she still hadn’t found someone she could really click with. No one here was interested in music or art or theater. It was all football and sports and cars. Things that she could really care less about, and everyone seemed to be talking about them. She was so out of her element that she didn’t even know where to start. So there she was again, standing in the doorway of the cafeteria, looking for an empty seat at a table where she could sit down and talk to someone, but all she could find was nothingness. And above all else, she really hated that feeling.
However, unlike yesterday, she knew where she could hide.
Gripping her bagged lunch tighter in her hand, she turned out of the cafeteria and fled to the music room. She had choir there tenth period, and she knew that there was sound proof pianos, set off from the rest of the room. She glanced around for a bit, to make sure she was alone, before darting off to one of the cubicles and sitting down in front of the piano. She left the door open, just so that she could hear the bell, but otherwise she was confident that she was alone.
It was relatively easy to distract her when there was a piano in front of her. She pulled the iPod earbuds out from where she’d hidden them in her shirt, placing one in her ear and hitting play. One hand started to play what she already knew of the song she was trying to learn, while the other wandered into her lunch bag to find the apple she had packed for herself, bringing it to her lips and taking a bite. Provided she wasn’t disturbed-which she doubted she would be-she was quite happy to stay there for as long as necessary.
This was where she was meant to be-not anywhere else.