Wordsmithing -- hear the anvil ring under the hammer blows...
So, I'm working on the basic documentation for the new Young Eagles club (called the Young Eagles Wing) that our EAA chapter is starting. (Hey, they put me in charge, I get to make the rules. Heh!) Here's my best draft for the mission and vision for the club. It may not look it, but I think every word is needed to get the idea across.
Young Eagles Mission - "The mission of the Young Eagles Wing is to provide young people access to the aviation community, teach them through activities and experiences the skills and knowledge needed to participate in that community, and guide them to develop attitudes and values that will serve them well as aviators and members of society."
Young Eagles Vision - "Young Eagles are young people who get connected to the aviation community in a way that was once available informally at airports everywhere. Young Eagles participate in aviation activities to learn the skills and knowledge to become aviators. Young Eagles also learn judgment, self-respect, and other attitudes of successful aviators and members of the community."
Am I right? Comments, questions, scathing rebuttal?
Young Eagles Mission - "The mission of the Young Eagles Wing is to provide young people access to the aviation community, teach them through activities and experiences the skills and knowledge needed to participate in that community, and guide them to develop attitudes and values that will serve them well as aviators and members of society."
Young Eagles Vision - "Young Eagles are young people who get connected to the aviation community in a way that was once available informally at airports everywhere. Young Eagles participate in aviation activities to learn the skills and knowledge to become aviators. Young Eagles also learn judgment, self-respect, and other attitudes of successful aviators and members of the community."
Am I right? Comments, questions, scathing rebuttal?