Five things I did today that made me feel GOOD:
1. Put some finishing type touches on my oversize puppet that I'm making for the Diana project. I'm actually really damn proud of it, and intensely critical at the same time. I made it from scratch, designed it, upholstered it, sewed it, stuffed it, made the wedding dress. It's really probably almost seven foot tall, and it's completely disassemble-able, that is, the body parts can be un-tied and removed. AWESOMENESS. On the other hand, it's grotesque, and I was at least partly aiming for "beautiful". But it's also cool in a way I wasn't expecting. Now all i have to do is learn to manipulate her, make her dance, eat, and so on. Which, considering I'm 5 foot 6 when I'm concentrating on good posture, is harder than it sounds.
2. Read some Luther towards my thesis rewrites. GOD. The Ninety-Five Theses are like 95 bullet points on the topic "why the Pope sucks, bring on the Reformation."
3. Walked home in the dark, in the rain listening to "God Says Nothing Back" by the Wallflowers. And some heavy metal, my "Supernatural badass rock" playlist on my ipod. Supernatural has given me new appreciation for muscle cars and mullet rock. And seeing as the rest of my playlists are more likely to be "super running emo tracks" or "orchestral" or "hippy anthems," it's kind of cool. Classic Rock is so damn... unapologetic.
4. Reflected on yesterday's marathon 7-episodes-of-Season-2-in-a-row marathon with my brother-in-law. We're developing a "Supernatural Drinking Game", although we don't actually drink while watching (and he doesn't drink at all). So far the rules involve drinking whenever:
a. Dean gets hit into a bookcase
b. Sam says "You never told me that"
c. Dean sets something on fire
d. Anyone says "So you think this isn't our kind of gig" or similar
e. Anyone says "It's in Dad's journal"
f. "Awkward"
g. Any time anyone assumes either or both Winchesters are gay
h. Any Star Wars reference
i. Any time Dean checks out some girl's ass (twice if Sam rolls his eyes)
j. "SAM!" or "DEAN!"
k. Any time both Sam and Dean say anything at exactly the same time
The rules are subject to change at any time!
5. Wrote some more on my Big Damn Unfinishable Fic, and made it past the 10,000 word mark. I figure it's about two thirds of the way there... but the end remains a kind of mirage at the moment, I can see how it MIGHT work, but I have no idea how I'm going to write it. And then, when that's done, I really want to fix the main story arc. I'm not even sure what tense some of it is going to be in, let alone more sophisticated things like Sam's slowly dawning realisation of what's going on and increasing understanding of Dean's issues as it goes. Ideally it's that understanding that will sort out the outcome. But what is Dean's response going to be, he can't be "don't sweat it Sammy" for ever. I'm writing Sammy's POV, and that's the catch, perhaps, because if Sam can't understand Dean, which is important for the plot, then we can't either. Damn you, Dean, SPEAK TO ME. Secretly you're my favourite, why are you so elusive?
Writing is hard, the end.