Text - Chapter 33
Title: Text
Author: gremlin4
Genre: Humor
Chapter: 33/??
Pairing: Kyo/Ruki
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Language.
Disclaimer: Still don't own them.
Summary: A bunch of text messages between Kyo and Ruki.
Hey, Kyo. I have a quick favor to ask you.
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Would you at least let me explain before you completely ignore me.
I promise it's nothing bad or harmful.
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Asshole!
I said BEFORE you completely ignore me. That didn't mean right from the beginning!
What the fuck did I do to piss you off already?
Not that it would take much since you're moodier than a room full of women menstruating!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Please tell me you're not asleep.
Fuck. You're asleep, aren't you?
God damn it!
What the fuck are you doing asleep at four in the afternoon?! I'm having a crisis here and you're drowning yourself in your own drool!
Now I resent that remark.
HE LIVES!!!
Firstly, I do not drool.
Unless you're having some out-of-body experiences in the middle of the night, I think you're just going to have to take my word for it.
I think you're lying to me.
Why would I ever lie about that?
Nevermind. This has nothing to do with you and whatever you do with your saliva in your sleep.
...
What were you doing asleep anyway? It's four in the afternoon.
Thought we weren't talking about me and my sleeping habits.
Answer the question, smartass.
Why do most people fall asleep?
Well, for you that would be because you're trying to get out of doing something.
For everyone else, i.e. normal people, I would say because they were tired.
...
I thought you had another photo shoot this afternoon.
Cancelled.
What? Why?
Something happened with the photographer and he couldn't make it.
I wasn't paying attention.
Glad to see you're so concerned.
Eh. I'll try being nice on a day that doesn't end with a 'y'.
Lol
I thought you had a crisis that I needed to avert.
Oh, yeah!
Thanks for the reminder.
...
Would you mind going over to my apartment and getting something for me?
Depends.
On?
Do I have to bring said item to you after I get it from your apartment?
I would love you forever if you did.
Then no.
Kyo!
No.
Please?
I have an afternoon to myself to do nothing and I'm not about to waste that on driving nearly two hours to drop something off for you.
But this is a crisis Kyo!
What the hell do you need so bad anyway?
I need you to go into my closet and get my emergency go bag from the top shelf!
You have an emergency go bag?
Uh, yeah.
What the fuck for?
Emergencies, you fucktard!
What the hell do you think most people need an emergency go bag for?
I thought we already established that we’re not anywhere close to normal.
Besides, who actually packs an emergency bag anyway? Even normal people don't do that.
That's not the point here, Kyo!
The point is that I need my bag and I can't leave right now to get it. I need you to bring me that bag!
Again, why do you need this bag?
Because I’m running away to Europe.
…
And believe it or not it wasn’t the band that drove me to this point.
Or you.
Who was it, then?
Actually it was this really gorgeous European I met at this café during our lunch break.
What?
I'm mean like, seriously gorgeous. Blond hair, blue eyes. Flawless skin, miles of hard muscles.
...
Tall. Really deep voice. Incredible fashion sense. Great with Koron.
You better pray the cops pull me over before I get there because when I do, I'm beating your ass after I kill the motherfucker.
Holy shit, Kyo! Calm down.
Not that the spanking is a problem, but there's no reason to murder someone. I was just joking.
...
Though I really did meet a hot European at lunch.
Ruki.
I'm kidding! Jesus!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Okay, seriously Kyo! You didn't have get Kai involved in this!
I'm not eloping to Europe with another man!
I WAS JOKING!
Just wanted to make sure whether I needed to go to your hotel or the airport first.
Does that mean you're already driving here?
...
Did you remember my bag by any chance?
What the fuck is so important in that goddamn bag?!
Because it’s got those really sexy boots and the gold pants inside.
And I need those for tonight.
...
For the live, Kyo!
I think you're lying to me again.
Oh my God!
Really Kyo?
Maybe I just don't want to?
Especially after all the hurtful things you've said to me today.
Get over it.
Wow. Way to make someone feel really appreciated and important Ruki.
I would be happy to show my appreciation and devotion to you Kyo.
In person preferably.
Oh really?
Oh, yes.
But first... I NEED MY DAMN BAG!
...
So are you going to bring the bag?
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Kyo! I need that bag!!!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
God damn you, you lazy assholic bastard!
If I have to drive all the way there and all the way back to get my bag, I’m going to beat you to death with it before I leave again.
Be my guest.
It’d certainly be a better fate than staying with you for the rest of my life.
The rest of your life, huh?
...
Aw, I never realized you were that committed to this relationship, Kyo!
God. Just kill me now.
You could just bring me the bag. I’d settle for that instead of your life.
Fine.
Note: *snickers* Kyo? Whipped? … NEVER! -lmao-
Author: gremlin4
Genre: Humor
Chapter: 33/??
Pairing: Kyo/Ruki
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Language.
Disclaimer: Still don't own them.
Summary: A bunch of text messages between Kyo and Ruki.
Hey, Kyo. I have a quick favor to ask you.
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Would you at least let me explain before you completely ignore me.
I promise it's nothing bad or harmful.
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Asshole!
I said BEFORE you completely ignore me. That didn't mean right from the beginning!
What the fuck did I do to piss you off already?
Not that it would take much since you're moodier than a room full of women menstruating!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Please tell me you're not asleep.
Fuck. You're asleep, aren't you?
God damn it!
What the fuck are you doing asleep at four in the afternoon?! I'm having a crisis here and you're drowning yourself in your own drool!
Now I resent that remark.
HE LIVES!!!
Firstly, I do not drool.
Unless you're having some out-of-body experiences in the middle of the night, I think you're just going to have to take my word for it.
I think you're lying to me.
Why would I ever lie about that?
Nevermind. This has nothing to do with you and whatever you do with your saliva in your sleep.
...
What were you doing asleep anyway? It's four in the afternoon.
Thought we weren't talking about me and my sleeping habits.
Answer the question, smartass.
Why do most people fall asleep?
Well, for you that would be because you're trying to get out of doing something.
For everyone else, i.e. normal people, I would say because they were tired.
...
I thought you had another photo shoot this afternoon.
Cancelled.
What? Why?
Something happened with the photographer and he couldn't make it.
I wasn't paying attention.
Glad to see you're so concerned.
Eh. I'll try being nice on a day that doesn't end with a 'y'.
Lol
I thought you had a crisis that I needed to avert.
Oh, yeah!
Thanks for the reminder.
...
Would you mind going over to my apartment and getting something for me?
Depends.
On?
Do I have to bring said item to you after I get it from your apartment?
I would love you forever if you did.
Then no.
Kyo!
No.
Please?
I have an afternoon to myself to do nothing and I'm not about to waste that on driving nearly two hours to drop something off for you.
But this is a crisis Kyo!
What the hell do you need so bad anyway?
I need you to go into my closet and get my emergency go bag from the top shelf!
You have an emergency go bag?
Uh, yeah.
What the fuck for?
Emergencies, you fucktard!
What the hell do you think most people need an emergency go bag for?
I thought we already established that we’re not anywhere close to normal.
Besides, who actually packs an emergency bag anyway? Even normal people don't do that.
That's not the point here, Kyo!
The point is that I need my bag and I can't leave right now to get it. I need you to bring me that bag!
Again, why do you need this bag?
Because I’m running away to Europe.
…
And believe it or not it wasn’t the band that drove me to this point.
Or you.
Who was it, then?
Actually it was this really gorgeous European I met at this café during our lunch break.
What?
I'm mean like, seriously gorgeous. Blond hair, blue eyes. Flawless skin, miles of hard muscles.
...
Tall. Really deep voice. Incredible fashion sense. Great with Koron.
You better pray the cops pull me over before I get there because when I do, I'm beating your ass after I kill the motherfucker.
Holy shit, Kyo! Calm down.
Not that the spanking is a problem, but there's no reason to murder someone. I was just joking.
...
Though I really did meet a hot European at lunch.
Ruki.
I'm kidding! Jesus!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Okay, seriously Kyo! You didn't have get Kai involved in this!
I'm not eloping to Europe with another man!
I WAS JOKING!
Just wanted to make sure whether I needed to go to your hotel or the airport first.
Does that mean you're already driving here?
...
Did you remember my bag by any chance?
What the fuck is so important in that goddamn bag?!
Because it’s got those really sexy boots and the gold pants inside.
And I need those for tonight.
...
For the live, Kyo!
I think you're lying to me again.
Oh my God!
Really Kyo?
Maybe I just don't want to?
Especially after all the hurtful things you've said to me today.
Get over it.
Wow. Way to make someone feel really appreciated and important Ruki.
I would be happy to show my appreciation and devotion to you Kyo.
In person preferably.
Oh really?
Oh, yes.
But first... I NEED MY DAMN BAG!
...
So are you going to bring the bag?
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
Kyo! I need that bag!!!
~*~*~*~Ten Minutes Later ~*~*~*~
God damn you, you lazy assholic bastard!
If I have to drive all the way there and all the way back to get my bag, I’m going to beat you to death with it before I leave again.
Be my guest.
It’d certainly be a better fate than staying with you for the rest of my life.
The rest of your life, huh?
...
Aw, I never realized you were that committed to this relationship, Kyo!
God. Just kill me now.
You could just bring me the bag. I’d settle for that instead of your life.
Fine.
Note: *snickers* Kyo? Whipped? … NEVER! -lmao-