(no subject)
why is it so hard to start a damn company. lol
i blame "the man".
well - i hooked up with some companies (Filmaka, PopTent, and a few others).
as soon as i get my camera up and working....and since i have editing software (shitty as it may be its better than windows movie maker lol)...and i really do have a talented hand and eye things will start rolling. It's gonna take a while but eventually i'll finish "Bobby's Story" too.
ive started working on another since my writers block is finally fucking gone and i have some inspiration to write once again. it doesn't have a name yet. Ill post something later but its based on a guy who was casted out from a group that once was his good friends. he was "different". he dressed different, listened to the "wrong" kind of music...that sort of thing. i hate using these words but he became "emo/punk" and these so called friends shut him out. so one day they are having a party and all is rockin when suddenly the door flies open and some guy runs in with guns blazzing. corners everyone via threats and pulls his mask off - its this kid. he starts to make this huge speech when one of the guys in the corner stands up and starts blabbing so the kid shoots him. he continues on with his story and everytime he mentions someones name he shoots them. once they are all dead he sits down and cries. talks about how he used to be the life of the party and how backstabbing people can be. he aims the gun at his jaw - screen goes black as you hear a gun shot and a body fall.
its a short film based on a theme from FIlmaka. each month you submit short films based on a different theme and this months theme is "The Party". I wanted to do something different than the cheery happy go lucky party that im sure a few people will do. FIgured it would stick out a bit more.
Bobby's Story has changed quite a bit too. I got sick of the whole "lets fake my death and then make people all weird" lol. Its turning to more of the Angel of Death thing like boondock saints only a bit more towards the highschool/college audience. only - maybe no deaths. ya get it? like he punishes the bad guys.
i donno - its weird. ill post a blip from it later.
^^^somehow a post that got deleted in the process of writing it due to my computer locking up got randomly restored when i went to post today. strange.
things are fucked up lately. im not myself. its getting worse. ive had thoughts of suicide...id never do it - mostly because i dont have the will power, and because of a few certain people. yesterday was the worst its been in a long time... i just laid around. i had no will power to do anything despite how hungry, bored, or tired i felt i just didnt want to eat, cure boredom, or sleep, or whatever. i didn't want to be social. and i cried my eyes out for a good 40 minutes just blabbing shit to my girlfriend. life really does suck....yes i know some have it worse but im not living a damn lollipop life either. id rather be on the streets than where im at right now. my house has become a hell hole. my parents are so two faced - they wonder why im not home anymore well if youd open your eyes and realize that the second i walk in the door someone starts a fight then you'd stay away too. I blame my sister too...shes never home and never has been so im always the one who gets troubles taken out on by mom. i hope they move like they want to. that could mean by the end of 09 the house is mine.
a movie i watched recently has been fucking with my beliefs and mental images. its called flatliners. dont watch it.
i just feel dead. likes its not worth it - nothing is worth it anymore.
im going to see a doctor next week. maybe i'll join the crowd of happy-pill-people...there is a cemical imbalance that runs in my blood line. my mom and dad both have it too.
i cant ignore it anylonger.
i blame "the man".
well - i hooked up with some companies (Filmaka, PopTent, and a few others).
as soon as i get my camera up and working....and since i have editing software (shitty as it may be its better than windows movie maker lol)...and i really do have a talented hand and eye things will start rolling. It's gonna take a while but eventually i'll finish "Bobby's Story" too.
ive started working on another since my writers block is finally fucking gone and i have some inspiration to write once again. it doesn't have a name yet. Ill post something later but its based on a guy who was casted out from a group that once was his good friends. he was "different". he dressed different, listened to the "wrong" kind of music...that sort of thing. i hate using these words but he became "emo/punk" and these so called friends shut him out. so one day they are having a party and all is rockin when suddenly the door flies open and some guy runs in with guns blazzing. corners everyone via threats and pulls his mask off - its this kid. he starts to make this huge speech when one of the guys in the corner stands up and starts blabbing so the kid shoots him. he continues on with his story and everytime he mentions someones name he shoots them. once they are all dead he sits down and cries. talks about how he used to be the life of the party and how backstabbing people can be. he aims the gun at his jaw - screen goes black as you hear a gun shot and a body fall.
its a short film based on a theme from FIlmaka. each month you submit short films based on a different theme and this months theme is "The Party". I wanted to do something different than the cheery happy go lucky party that im sure a few people will do. FIgured it would stick out a bit more.
Bobby's Story has changed quite a bit too. I got sick of the whole "lets fake my death and then make people all weird" lol. Its turning to more of the Angel of Death thing like boondock saints only a bit more towards the highschool/college audience. only - maybe no deaths. ya get it? like he punishes the bad guys.
i donno - its weird. ill post a blip from it later.
^^^somehow a post that got deleted in the process of writing it due to my computer locking up got randomly restored when i went to post today. strange.
things are fucked up lately. im not myself. its getting worse. ive had thoughts of suicide...id never do it - mostly because i dont have the will power, and because of a few certain people. yesterday was the worst its been in a long time... i just laid around. i had no will power to do anything despite how hungry, bored, or tired i felt i just didnt want to eat, cure boredom, or sleep, or whatever. i didn't want to be social. and i cried my eyes out for a good 40 minutes just blabbing shit to my girlfriend. life really does suck....yes i know some have it worse but im not living a damn lollipop life either. id rather be on the streets than where im at right now. my house has become a hell hole. my parents are so two faced - they wonder why im not home anymore well if youd open your eyes and realize that the second i walk in the door someone starts a fight then you'd stay away too. I blame my sister too...shes never home and never has been so im always the one who gets troubles taken out on by mom. i hope they move like they want to. that could mean by the end of 09 the house is mine.
a movie i watched recently has been fucking with my beliefs and mental images. its called flatliners. dont watch it.
i just feel dead. likes its not worth it - nothing is worth it anymore.
im going to see a doctor next week. maybe i'll join the crowd of happy-pill-people...there is a cemical imbalance that runs in my blood line. my mom and dad both have it too.
i cant ignore it anylonger.