Aug 01, 2019 09:37
Found on the internet: "Life is hard work. And you want to share that life with someone who wants to work at life in a way in which is compatible with how you want to work at life. Having to “work on the relationship” takes away the focus and momentum needed to proper maintain and advance one’s life towards their goals and ambitions"
This is getting at something I've been feeling lately.
It's related to a question my therapist asked me: "so is this a new kind of intimacy for you?" to which I answered it felt almost less intimate, because instead of collapsing into one person with one set of desires we're supporting each other as decidedly separate entities.
The discussion had to do with learning to collaborate on making decisions in a relationship (where shall we live?) since with big decisions like there hasn't previously been choice (we can't afford anything else) and differing needs that could be expressed (closer to an airport and town, on acreage).
When you end up encouraging each other to take your own life paths, how to you make sure they remain parallel enough?
home,
relationships,
mental health