(no subject)
i tend to have these crazy fits where i whole-heartedly believe i am in all my right to make a rash decision and then i have time to rationalize...
i still know i'm right. but i can't blame anyone. it's just two different people wanting two different things. i'm simply hurt and feel it my need to point a finger. there's no need to.
i love the people i work with. i could not have asked for a better first job. it's been two years there and i still love it. this christmas will mark my two year anniversary. time has flown by. it's incredible.
i've been having these weird thoughts. thoughts i haven't had since like middle school. it's ridiculous. wake up, amanda. lol.
i have managed to keep my nails out of my mouth for over a month now, and i am proud to say my nails are now long and strong and neat. yay. i'm definitely happy about that. i can't remember the last time my nails looked presentable. my hair is also a little shorter now. everyone loves it. i like it. but the shorter it is, the faster i get to grow out new healthy hair. i'm also happy about that.
albert bought me a nice magnetic book mark from california when he went for vacation. it was so thoughtful of him. i felt special since he didn't get anyone else souvenirs. so for his birthday i gave him a book i knew he'd love and i baked him a key lime pie. it was delicious.
i don't know why i feel like i need to save people. the ones that attract me are always emotionally starved individuals with a tough exterior. and because of this i always get screwed over. these individuals are not emotionally starved, they just don't give a shit. and for some reason i find that incomprehensible.
now i know this is the way it is so i won't try any harder.
the things i write here never make sense. they are just random thoughts that i wish to no longer contain in my mind.
so where am i now? i really feel lost.
i still know i'm right. but i can't blame anyone. it's just two different people wanting two different things. i'm simply hurt and feel it my need to point a finger. there's no need to.
i love the people i work with. i could not have asked for a better first job. it's been two years there and i still love it. this christmas will mark my two year anniversary. time has flown by. it's incredible.
i've been having these weird thoughts. thoughts i haven't had since like middle school. it's ridiculous. wake up, amanda. lol.
i have managed to keep my nails out of my mouth for over a month now, and i am proud to say my nails are now long and strong and neat. yay. i'm definitely happy about that. i can't remember the last time my nails looked presentable. my hair is also a little shorter now. everyone loves it. i like it. but the shorter it is, the faster i get to grow out new healthy hair. i'm also happy about that.
albert bought me a nice magnetic book mark from california when he went for vacation. it was so thoughtful of him. i felt special since he didn't get anyone else souvenirs. so for his birthday i gave him a book i knew he'd love and i baked him a key lime pie. it was delicious.
i don't know why i feel like i need to save people. the ones that attract me are always emotionally starved individuals with a tough exterior. and because of this i always get screwed over. these individuals are not emotionally starved, they just don't give a shit. and for some reason i find that incomprehensible.
now i know this is the way it is so i won't try any harder.
the things i write here never make sense. they are just random thoughts that i wish to no longer contain in my mind.
so where am i now? i really feel lost.