deader than a dodo
mondays are like that sometimes. i've been quizzing myself on mandarin characters. i can now write "chinese is really hard" in, ya know, chinese.
tonight i'm to sup at a ms. al's house before we giggle our way through another evening of her sketching me. i missed modelling. there's something introspective (yet social!) about trying to be still whilst another human being examines you and immortalises your flaws on paper. one of my problems when i'm socialising is that i have an irrisistable urge to either look at one person or to look at everything: the room, the other people in it, my hands, my food. keeping my eyes on my fellow conversationalist's faces tends to unnerve them, and if i can't stare, then my eyes wander. posing eliminates that awkwardness; i'm staring at an object, but it's staring without the discomfort of scrutiny. in short: i'm looking forward to tonight, probably more than the artist is. socialising is usually such a drag, but with ms. al (and mr. al) i don't feel the effort.
i've just started reading henry rollins's book a dull roar, which chronicles his 2006 summer activities. he's talking about getting the original rollins band lineup together for the punk tour. i'm curious what he'll say about the dynamic on the road. when i saw them they seemed a little tense, as if a serious something were not right. after the show (as one jersey boy to a jersey girl) sim said that they're never do another reunion tour, and i couldn't find it in me to be surprised. they were incredible - i was in the front row, getting sweated on by hank and smiled at by sim - but they didn't feel as much like a unit as i'd hoped. which is only to be expected, i suppose: if you spend a decade apart, the schism is likely to run deep. but i have this fantasy in my head that when my friends and i see each other again, whether it's been five days or five years, we'll pick up right where we left off. maybe twenty seconds of screaming and hugging before we settle down into our old habits of not-so-veiled insults and spontaneous singing. and i assume that because me and mine would do so that every other cool person on the planet would as well.
viva la vie boheme.
tonight i'm to sup at a ms. al's house before we giggle our way through another evening of her sketching me. i missed modelling. there's something introspective (yet social!) about trying to be still whilst another human being examines you and immortalises your flaws on paper. one of my problems when i'm socialising is that i have an irrisistable urge to either look at one person or to look at everything: the room, the other people in it, my hands, my food. keeping my eyes on my fellow conversationalist's faces tends to unnerve them, and if i can't stare, then my eyes wander. posing eliminates that awkwardness; i'm staring at an object, but it's staring without the discomfort of scrutiny. in short: i'm looking forward to tonight, probably more than the artist is. socialising is usually such a drag, but with ms. al (and mr. al) i don't feel the effort.
i've just started reading henry rollins's book a dull roar, which chronicles his 2006 summer activities. he's talking about getting the original rollins band lineup together for the punk tour. i'm curious what he'll say about the dynamic on the road. when i saw them they seemed a little tense, as if a serious something were not right. after the show (as one jersey boy to a jersey girl) sim said that they're never do another reunion tour, and i couldn't find it in me to be surprised. they were incredible - i was in the front row, getting sweated on by hank and smiled at by sim - but they didn't feel as much like a unit as i'd hoped. which is only to be expected, i suppose: if you spend a decade apart, the schism is likely to run deep. but i have this fantasy in my head that when my friends and i see each other again, whether it's been five days or five years, we'll pick up right where we left off. maybe twenty seconds of screaming and hugging before we settle down into our old habits of not-so-veiled insults and spontaneous singing. and i assume that because me and mine would do so that every other cool person on the planet would as well.
viva la vie boheme.