church. argh. food.
Tomorrow I'm going to church.
I'm taking my mother to church for Mother's Day. Our old church. She doesn't do it much anymore... hasn't been for ages, actually, since way before my dad got sick. Anyway, one of the reasons she went back when she did go (she started going again after my brother died for a while), was because of the music. As a musician, she loves hymns. I found out tomorrow is a hymn-sing - focusing on old hymns (her favorites) - so I asked her if she'd like to go. She's 99% in the "yes" camp, so I think we're going. (The 1% is her resistance to being approached by numerous people to express their condolences. Appreciated, but hard for her.)
Anyway. Last time I was in the church was Dad's service. I'm not exactly sure why I offered except that the timing and the music-focus seemed providential and I knew I was going to take her somewhere tomorrow. It's worked out well to go pick her up and take her somewhere then come back and drop her off, because it limits the time I spend at the house, which is still extremely difficult for me to do right now. He built the entire place... including the furniture, the cabinets, etc. It's just too much right now.
Then we'll take her to lunch.
No gaming tomorrow, which is a bummer. It's been keeping me afloat lately... along with Debbie, who deserves the real credit. Gaming makes me laugh and keeps me social and actually activates my brain, which is good.
One thing I'm finding in a lot of areas of my life... people say they understand, that everyone is different, and that you should take all the time you need, be patient with yourself, and not to expect to be okay any time soon. They don't mean it. Maybe they think they do, but their actions speak a lot louder than their words. And sometimes their words speak louder than their other words.
I've stuck reasonably well to my leave of absence from all things except my day job, only taking on two small grant projects for a long standing client because April was an extremely lean month and they were small and short. The grief group is good, and helpful. The stress reduction class is okay, but not as helpful as we'd hoped. However, we're also aware that we are not doing everything that is being suggested on a daily basis, and we knew from the start that the class motto is that the more you do during the off time, the more you get out of the class. So we're not faulting the class, we're just not as happy with it as we'd hoped.
Cleaning the house today. Ugh. But we must prepare for the new futon! In preparation of Debbie's mom's stay this summer. It's being delivered Tuesday, because Debbie may be leaving on Thursday for six weeks. Long story, that is now somewhat up in the air. But anyway... futon coming. Must have a place to put it.
*
I'm taking my mother to church for Mother's Day. Our old church. She doesn't do it much anymore... hasn't been for ages, actually, since way before my dad got sick. Anyway, one of the reasons she went back when she did go (she started going again after my brother died for a while), was because of the music. As a musician, she loves hymns. I found out tomorrow is a hymn-sing - focusing on old hymns (her favorites) - so I asked her if she'd like to go. She's 99% in the "yes" camp, so I think we're going. (The 1% is her resistance to being approached by numerous people to express their condolences. Appreciated, but hard for her.)
Anyway. Last time I was in the church was Dad's service. I'm not exactly sure why I offered except that the timing and the music-focus seemed providential and I knew I was going to take her somewhere tomorrow. It's worked out well to go pick her up and take her somewhere then come back and drop her off, because it limits the time I spend at the house, which is still extremely difficult for me to do right now. He built the entire place... including the furniture, the cabinets, etc. It's just too much right now.
Then we'll take her to lunch.
No gaming tomorrow, which is a bummer. It's been keeping me afloat lately... along with Debbie, who deserves the real credit. Gaming makes me laugh and keeps me social and actually activates my brain, which is good.
One thing I'm finding in a lot of areas of my life... people say they understand, that everyone is different, and that you should take all the time you need, be patient with yourself, and not to expect to be okay any time soon. They don't mean it. Maybe they think they do, but their actions speak a lot louder than their words. And sometimes their words speak louder than their other words.
I've stuck reasonably well to my leave of absence from all things except my day job, only taking on two small grant projects for a long standing client because April was an extremely lean month and they were small and short. The grief group is good, and helpful. The stress reduction class is okay, but not as helpful as we'd hoped. However, we're also aware that we are not doing everything that is being suggested on a daily basis, and we knew from the start that the class motto is that the more you do during the off time, the more you get out of the class. So we're not faulting the class, we're just not as happy with it as we'd hoped.
Cleaning the house today. Ugh. But we must prepare for the new futon! In preparation of Debbie's mom's stay this summer. It's being delivered Tuesday, because Debbie may be leaving on Thursday for six weeks. Long story, that is now somewhat up in the air. But anyway... futon coming. Must have a place to put it.
*