"A Thanksgiving Prayer (for the City of Charlotte)"
(with thanks and love to the memory of William S. Burroughs)
*Thank you for being a clearinghouse for all of North Carolina's problems.
*Thank you for regularly showing up in the national media for all the wrong reasons.
*Thank you for butt-raping potentially great neighborhoods in order to build more condos, office buildings, and parking decks.
*Thank you for building an arena downtown, even though most everyone voted against it.
*Thank you for allowing so many old houses to remain abandoned and in disrepair while so many thousands of your sons and daughters live on the streets, alone and sick.
*Thank you for one of the most inefficient and corrupt police departments in the country.
*Thank you for the ongoing joke that is CMS (Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools).
*Thank you for believing that you can tell everyone in the Carolinas how to live (who needs Raleigh and Columbia, anyway?).
*Thank you for being too goddamn big for your britches.
*Thank you for shitting on low-income artists who don't stand a chance in hell of jumping through your political hoops from the Arts and Science Council.
*Thank you for being an incubator for pseudo-spiritual developer and land baron assholes who would sooner see us dead.
*Thank you for being the very worst at what you do.
*Thank you for building a light rail system thirty years too late.
*Thank you, Charlotte, North Carolina, for being the crusty old g-string riding up the turgid crotch of the so-called "New South." "You always were a headache, and you always were a bore."
*Thank you for being red on the head like a dick on a dog.
*Thank you for nothing.
Yours very sincerely...
(buh-bye!)...
David Alan Goldberg
*Thank you for being a clearinghouse for all of North Carolina's problems.
*Thank you for regularly showing up in the national media for all the wrong reasons.
*Thank you for butt-raping potentially great neighborhoods in order to build more condos, office buildings, and parking decks.
*Thank you for building an arena downtown, even though most everyone voted against it.
*Thank you for allowing so many old houses to remain abandoned and in disrepair while so many thousands of your sons and daughters live on the streets, alone and sick.
*Thank you for one of the most inefficient and corrupt police departments in the country.
*Thank you for the ongoing joke that is CMS (Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools).
*Thank you for believing that you can tell everyone in the Carolinas how to live (who needs Raleigh and Columbia, anyway?).
*Thank you for being too goddamn big for your britches.
*Thank you for shitting on low-income artists who don't stand a chance in hell of jumping through your political hoops from the Arts and Science Council.
*Thank you for being an incubator for pseudo-spiritual developer and land baron assholes who would sooner see us dead.
*Thank you for being the very worst at what you do.
*Thank you for building a light rail system thirty years too late.
*Thank you, Charlotte, North Carolina, for being the crusty old g-string riding up the turgid crotch of the so-called "New South." "You always were a headache, and you always were a bore."
*Thank you for being red on the head like a dick on a dog.
*Thank you for nothing.
Yours very sincerely...
(buh-bye!)...
David Alan Goldberg