Fic: 4 Years In
Title: 4 Years In
Rating: PG
Genre: Fluffernutters...with a healthy dose of angst
Pairings: Ten/Rose, Baby
Disclaimer: They ain't mine
A/N: Thank you again for all the awesome feedback on this. I'm really glad so many people seem to like this, as I love writing it.
Summary: I know your Da usually writes these, but he isn't here right now, and I don't know when he's coming back.
Under the cut
Dear Sally,
Today you are four years old.
I know your Da usually writes these, but he isn't here right now, and I don't know when he's coming back.
He is coming back, though. Don't worry on that.
A lot has happened in the last couple of days, and I know a lot of it is very scary. We're all okay though. You and me and you Da. We're okay. I know you were scared because I got hurt, but I'm going to be fine.
I think that's why your Da left for a bit. The thing is, Sweetheart, that he's afraid of losing people, and when I got hurt, he didn't know what to do. So he left. But like I said, he's going to come back. He'd never leave us for good.
Mostly cause he knows that if he tried, I'd kill him. But also because he loves us. I know he doesn't say it too often, but he does, and he knows we'd be sad if he left and never came back.
He'd be sad about that, too.
And I know he didn't mean to miss your birthday. I bet he's devising a way to make it up to you as we speak...er...write.
Talking about writing, you learned to write your name a couple of weeks back. And since then you've been writing it everywhere. Though please not on Granny Jackie's wall again. That wasn't very nice of you.
I'd write more, but I'm getting a little tired. I know this doesn't make up for your Da not being here. I wish he was here, too.
Happy birthday, Sally. I love you.
Love,
Mummy
****
The TARDIS materialized in Rose's hospital room two nights later, and the Doctor stepped out looking tired and rather guilty. He slowly walked over to the bed and sat down on its edge, slumping over so his head lay next to Rose's.
"Should I even bother asking where you've been?" she asked quietly, reaching out to stroke his hair.
"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I should have been here for you."
"Yeah, you should have," Rose said evenly. "But you missed a very important day while you were gone?"
"Blimey," he said, closing his eyes. "Is it our anniversary already?"
"If by anniversary, you mean four years to the day when we had Sally..."
He shot up to a sitting position. "Rassilon. I'm a terrible father."
"You were preoccupied."
"How upset is she?" the Doctor asked. "How many presents should I get? Do you think I should get a cake? Balloons?"
She yawned slightly and wrapped an arm around her middle. "I think you should go out to the waiting room where she's been curled up with Jack and apologize, and tell her why you left."
He shut his mouth.
"She deserves an explanation."
"I don't think I can give her one."
"Doctor..."
He got up and ran a hand through his hair. "You know why I left, don't you?"
"Yeah," Rose said quietly. "I know..."
The Doctor slumped against the TARDIS. "I shouldn't have left. I know that."
"I'm not angry with you," Rose said. "I knew you'd come back."
"What would you have done if I didn't?"
"Did you think about it?"
He shook his head.
"Then I don't need to think about what I would haven't done if you hadn't come back."
He didn't say anything for a long moment. "How are you feeling?"
"Tired," Rose replied. "Still hurts a bit."
"It's gonna do that for a while," the Doctor said. "I'm gonna be right out in the waiting room if you need me."
She nodded and closed her eyes.
He watched her for a long moment before quietly leaving the room and heading for the waiting area, where Jack and Sally were curled up on a couple of the chairs.
Jack sat up and glared at him. "Where the hell have you been?"
"What's hell?" Sally asked, rubbing her eyes. She sat up as well and looked up. "Da!" She climbed down and rushed over, wrapping her arms around the Doctor's leg.
"Hello," the Doctor muttered, lifting her up. "You miss me?"
"Where did you go?"
"Bit of a jaunt," he replied. "Had to take care of something." He frowned. "I'm sorry I missed your birthday."
"That's okay," Sally said sadly. "You were out saving the uniworld."
"Verse."
"Chorus."
"Cheeky." The Doctor looked her in the eyes. "You been looking after your mum for me?"
Sally nodded. "I got her lots of water, and got Auntie Martha when Mummy didn't feel good."
"That's a good girl," the Doctor grinned. "I promise I will make this up to you."
Jack watched the two warily. "How do you plan to do that?"
"Never you mind, Captain. Have you been behaving yourself?"
"More than you," Jack replied. "You seen Rose?"
The Doctor nodded. "She's resting. You're angry with me."
"Yup."
"Jack..."
"You bailed."
"Only for a few days."
"And that makes it okay?" Jack snapped. "Rose was seriously injured."
"I'm aware."
"She could have died."
"Mummy didn't die," Sally said quietly.
"And she isn't going to," the Doctor said quickly. "Not for a good long while."
"Is that why you went?" she asked. "Cause you thought Mummy was gonna die?"
Jack got to his feet and stretched a little. "I'm gonna go find some coffee."
The Doctor watched him walk off and then sighed heavily, sitting down in one of the uncomfortable chairs with Sally on his lap. "I left because I was scared that I might lose your mum."
Sally stared at him blankly.
"Y'know how she's human, and I'm not?"
Sally nodded.
"Well...because of that, her life is going to be much shorter than mine," the Doctor said quietly. "And I was so scared that I had lost her for good that I ran away."
"What happens when her life goes away?" Sally asked curiously, pulling on her father's tie.
"Well," he said awkwardly. "When that happens...she'll die." He sat up a little. "You remember how that plant in the garden wilted and died?"
Sally nodded.
"That happens to humans, too."
"They turn all crusty and droop and snap?"
The Doctor sighed. "Some people get sick, and some people get too old and some people get hurt..."
"What happens when humans die?"
"They...they don't exist anymore," the Doctor said quietly. "They go away, and they never come back."
"Oh."
He nodded.
"That's gonna happen to Mummy?"
He wrapped both arms around her. "Someday, a long, long time from now."
Sally looked panicked. "I don't want that to happen to Mummy."
The Doctor nodded. "Neither do I." He perked up a little. "Like I told you. It isn't going to happen for a very long time. So don't you worry on it now. We should be happy now, cause you, Sally Rose, are four years old."
"Do I get to fly the TARDIS now?" she asked excitedly.
He opened his mouth to answer and then bit his lip. "Give it a few more years."
Sally pouted.
Rating: PG
Genre: Fluffernutters...with a healthy dose of angst
Pairings: Ten/Rose, Baby
Disclaimer: They ain't mine
A/N: Thank you again for all the awesome feedback on this. I'm really glad so many people seem to like this, as I love writing it.
Summary: I know your Da usually writes these, but he isn't here right now, and I don't know when he's coming back.
Under the cut
Dear Sally,
Today you are four years old.
I know your Da usually writes these, but he isn't here right now, and I don't know when he's coming back.
He is coming back, though. Don't worry on that.
A lot has happened in the last couple of days, and I know a lot of it is very scary. We're all okay though. You and me and you Da. We're okay. I know you were scared because I got hurt, but I'm going to be fine.
I think that's why your Da left for a bit. The thing is, Sweetheart, that he's afraid of losing people, and when I got hurt, he didn't know what to do. So he left. But like I said, he's going to come back. He'd never leave us for good.
Mostly cause he knows that if he tried, I'd kill him. But also because he loves us. I know he doesn't say it too often, but he does, and he knows we'd be sad if he left and never came back.
He'd be sad about that, too.
And I know he didn't mean to miss your birthday. I bet he's devising a way to make it up to you as we speak...er...write.
Talking about writing, you learned to write your name a couple of weeks back. And since then you've been writing it everywhere. Though please not on Granny Jackie's wall again. That wasn't very nice of you.
I'd write more, but I'm getting a little tired. I know this doesn't make up for your Da not being here. I wish he was here, too.
Happy birthday, Sally. I love you.
Love,
Mummy
****
The TARDIS materialized in Rose's hospital room two nights later, and the Doctor stepped out looking tired and rather guilty. He slowly walked over to the bed and sat down on its edge, slumping over so his head lay next to Rose's.
"Should I even bother asking where you've been?" she asked quietly, reaching out to stroke his hair.
"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I should have been here for you."
"Yeah, you should have," Rose said evenly. "But you missed a very important day while you were gone?"
"Blimey," he said, closing his eyes. "Is it our anniversary already?"
"If by anniversary, you mean four years to the day when we had Sally..."
He shot up to a sitting position. "Rassilon. I'm a terrible father."
"You were preoccupied."
"How upset is she?" the Doctor asked. "How many presents should I get? Do you think I should get a cake? Balloons?"
She yawned slightly and wrapped an arm around her middle. "I think you should go out to the waiting room where she's been curled up with Jack and apologize, and tell her why you left."
He shut his mouth.
"She deserves an explanation."
"I don't think I can give her one."
"Doctor..."
He got up and ran a hand through his hair. "You know why I left, don't you?"
"Yeah," Rose said quietly. "I know..."
The Doctor slumped against the TARDIS. "I shouldn't have left. I know that."
"I'm not angry with you," Rose said. "I knew you'd come back."
"What would you have done if I didn't?"
"Did you think about it?"
He shook his head.
"Then I don't need to think about what I would haven't done if you hadn't come back."
He didn't say anything for a long moment. "How are you feeling?"
"Tired," Rose replied. "Still hurts a bit."
"It's gonna do that for a while," the Doctor said. "I'm gonna be right out in the waiting room if you need me."
She nodded and closed her eyes.
He watched her for a long moment before quietly leaving the room and heading for the waiting area, where Jack and Sally were curled up on a couple of the chairs.
Jack sat up and glared at him. "Where the hell have you been?"
"What's hell?" Sally asked, rubbing her eyes. She sat up as well and looked up. "Da!" She climbed down and rushed over, wrapping her arms around the Doctor's leg.
"Hello," the Doctor muttered, lifting her up. "You miss me?"
"Where did you go?"
"Bit of a jaunt," he replied. "Had to take care of something." He frowned. "I'm sorry I missed your birthday."
"That's okay," Sally said sadly. "You were out saving the uniworld."
"Verse."
"Chorus."
"Cheeky." The Doctor looked her in the eyes. "You been looking after your mum for me?"
Sally nodded. "I got her lots of water, and got Auntie Martha when Mummy didn't feel good."
"That's a good girl," the Doctor grinned. "I promise I will make this up to you."
Jack watched the two warily. "How do you plan to do that?"
"Never you mind, Captain. Have you been behaving yourself?"
"More than you," Jack replied. "You seen Rose?"
The Doctor nodded. "She's resting. You're angry with me."
"Yup."
"Jack..."
"You bailed."
"Only for a few days."
"And that makes it okay?" Jack snapped. "Rose was seriously injured."
"I'm aware."
"She could have died."
"Mummy didn't die," Sally said quietly.
"And she isn't going to," the Doctor said quickly. "Not for a good long while."
"Is that why you went?" she asked. "Cause you thought Mummy was gonna die?"
Jack got to his feet and stretched a little. "I'm gonna go find some coffee."
The Doctor watched him walk off and then sighed heavily, sitting down in one of the uncomfortable chairs with Sally on his lap. "I left because I was scared that I might lose your mum."
Sally stared at him blankly.
"Y'know how she's human, and I'm not?"
Sally nodded.
"Well...because of that, her life is going to be much shorter than mine," the Doctor said quietly. "And I was so scared that I had lost her for good that I ran away."
"What happens when her life goes away?" Sally asked curiously, pulling on her father's tie.
"Well," he said awkwardly. "When that happens...she'll die." He sat up a little. "You remember how that plant in the garden wilted and died?"
Sally nodded.
"That happens to humans, too."
"They turn all crusty and droop and snap?"
The Doctor sighed. "Some people get sick, and some people get too old and some people get hurt..."
"What happens when humans die?"
"They...they don't exist anymore," the Doctor said quietly. "They go away, and they never come back."
"Oh."
He nodded.
"That's gonna happen to Mummy?"
He wrapped both arms around her. "Someday, a long, long time from now."
Sally looked panicked. "I don't want that to happen to Mummy."
The Doctor nodded. "Neither do I." He perked up a little. "Like I told you. It isn't going to happen for a very long time. So don't you worry on it now. We should be happy now, cause you, Sally Rose, are four years old."
"Do I get to fly the TARDIS now?" she asked excitedly.
He opened his mouth to answer and then bit his lip. "Give it a few more years."
Sally pouted.