And we will never feel quite clean
I stopped a rape in progress the other day.
I was walking through Union Square in San Francisco on my way back to the hotel (this was last week, my trip was all business), and I saw a woman struggling to get away from two homeless guys pinning her against the wall. I ran up there, grabbed the smaller guy, tossed him at his friend, and violenced in their general direction until they ran off.
Then I turned around and said "Excuse me Ma'am, do you have the time?"
As ridiculous as it sounds, I really just wanted to have any sort of normal conversation that would get her out of panicked-victim-mode. And it worked, she calmed down and I walked her to the party she was going to a couple of blocks away, but underneath the "OMG Knight in Shining Armor You're So Cool!!!" I could tell she really wanted me to leave.
What struck me is how much *I* wanted to get out of there, too.
Sure enough the thought crossed my mind of asking for her number or to let me buy her a drink, but everything I came up with smacked of "I saved you, now I OWN you." On the one hand, that's the male-dominant side of the "Hero Fantasy" coin, but she had zero desire to be there. Even in terms of interacting with me. Like I was part of the situation that was raping her.
I think this is why policemen have similar psych profiles to criminals. There's an element of non-consensuality about that kind of violence that you have to thrive on if you want to seriously wear that skin.
Anyway I gave her my card in case she ever wanted to actively contact me, which I STILL feel weird about, and went on my way after it was clear she was at her destination.
And she refused to contact the police. Not really surprising, she just wanted to get it over and done with and move on.
Ultimately, though... I stopped that shit. Awesome.
I was walking through Union Square in San Francisco on my way back to the hotel (this was last week, my trip was all business), and I saw a woman struggling to get away from two homeless guys pinning her against the wall. I ran up there, grabbed the smaller guy, tossed him at his friend, and violenced in their general direction until they ran off.
Then I turned around and said "Excuse me Ma'am, do you have the time?"
As ridiculous as it sounds, I really just wanted to have any sort of normal conversation that would get her out of panicked-victim-mode. And it worked, she calmed down and I walked her to the party she was going to a couple of blocks away, but underneath the "OMG Knight in Shining Armor You're So Cool!!!" I could tell she really wanted me to leave.
What struck me is how much *I* wanted to get out of there, too.
Sure enough the thought crossed my mind of asking for her number or to let me buy her a drink, but everything I came up with smacked of "I saved you, now I OWN you." On the one hand, that's the male-dominant side of the "Hero Fantasy" coin, but she had zero desire to be there. Even in terms of interacting with me. Like I was part of the situation that was raping her.
I think this is why policemen have similar psych profiles to criminals. There's an element of non-consensuality about that kind of violence that you have to thrive on if you want to seriously wear that skin.
Anyway I gave her my card in case she ever wanted to actively contact me, which I STILL feel weird about, and went on my way after it was clear she was at her destination.
And she refused to contact the police. Not really surprising, she just wanted to get it over and done with and move on.
Ultimately, though... I stopped that shit. Awesome.