Mediocrity
"It's not happy."
"But I'm happy."
"Do you write when you're happy?"
"Sometimes, but it still sounds unhappy."
Because I am not happy
If this is happiness
If what I'm feeling is happy
I say life is pointless
Constantly discontented
Always worried and unsmiling
Hollow laughs are my only laughs
I seem to glare when I'm emotionless
I'm aware that I'm in denial
But sometimes I just don't care
There's so much to come to terms with
So much to even out
That my nervous breakdown would last
Our lifetime
You would run away from it, too
I'm digging my shit hole
Deeper and deeper and deeper
Every day
I could try to climb out
But burying myself with more
Is just what I'm accustomed to
Getting out could be a possibility
But I've learned to like it down here
Knowing there will always be more shit
I like not worrying about getting too deep
Because I'm already there
I don't want to live, because then I'll have to worry about dying.