Make You Mine /// Sixteenth Lie: Too Close
Title: Make You Mine
Pairing: Akanishi Jin x Kazuya Kamenashi //Akame//
Genre: Romance, AU
Rating: PG-13 and up.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story. I don't make profit with this.
Summary: The first impression counts and Kazuya's first impression of Jin is not the best. However, Jin is determined to get to know Kazuya - and Kazuya makes up a few lies, which suddenly become huge... And then, the tide is turning.
A/N: English isn't my mother tongue, but I lived in the UK for quite a time, so I basically write and speak well. You're welcome to correct any mistakes, though. Of course.
Now, I could say that Amafurase Tanmaina line again, but honestly, now that it's finally spring, I rather listen to it and then, saying it, really is fast! *lol*
Anyways, here's the new chap and most of your questions are answered. What happened to Kazuya and could he protect Natsuki after all?
Please enjoy it :) ♥
Previous Chapters:
First Lie: Who am I?
Second Lie: Find Me
Third Lie: Exposed
Fourth Lie: On Repeat
Fifth Lie: More of You
Sixth Lie: Not My Fault
Seventh Lie: Out of Reach
Eighth Lie: Leaving You
Ninth Lie: Hold On
Tenth Lie: Secret
Eleventh Lie: Broken Lovers
Twelfth Lie: Worry About You
Thirteenth Lie: I Won't
Fourteenth Lie: Only My Illursion
Fifteenth Lie: Heavy Damage
Sixteenth Lie: Too Close
“Excuse me”, Nakagawa said. “Who?”
Jin ran a hand through his hair and felt it trembling. “Natsuki was supposed to be with Kazuya.”
The detective frowned. “Who is that?”
Jin swallowed thickly. “My daughter. Kazuya had picked her up from preschool today and they were supposed to be together”, Jin answered. Then, he felt something inside him break. “Where is Kazuya?”
Nakagawa gave him a sympathising look. “Listen, Akanishi….”
“No”, Jin said. The possibility that Kazuya had been in that fire was out of question. It couldn’t be. “He’s with my daughter. They are at my house.”
The detective exchanged a look with his colleague. “You have a house?”
Jin nodded. “Yes. Kazuya and Natsuki are there right now.” He picked up the phone on his desk and dialled in the number. Jin’s expression got empty, as it kept ringing.
“Akanishi, we really need you to come to the station and….”
“Natsuki”, Jin just said. “I can’t go anywhere if Natsuki’s missing.”
Nakagawa got out his mobile. “Give me the address. We will send someone to check on the house.”
Jin told him, then, he took his jacket and his keys. “I have to go.”
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa yelled.
“I have to find my daughter”, Jin said and dashed out of the room.
Nakagawa had caught up in an instant. “We really need you to come to the station. Kamenashi is…”
Jin stopped and stared at him with fierce eyes. “Kazuya is with Natsuki. And I am going to check on them now.”
Nakagawa looked after Jin for a moment. Then, he got out his mobile again and informed the station that he would follow Jin.
Jin got into his car and noticed that a car escorted him, but didn’t really pay attention. He ignored all speed limits and as he arrived at his house, he let go of his breath.
Kazuya’s car was still parked in his slip road.
Jin parked his behind Kazuya’s and got out the car.
“Look”, he said to the detective who approached him quickly. “His car is here.”
Nakagawa frowned and again, got out his mobile. “I need more people here. This is rather suspicious. Akanishi, wait!” He followed Jin and pushed him aside a bit, before Jin could just open up the door.
“Someone could be still inside.”
Jin gave him a confused look, but didn’t say anything, as Nakagawa slowly pressed down the handle and found the door unlocked.
Nakagawa walked in first and peeked through the entrance, before he approached the kitchen.
Jin followed and he felt his heart skip a beat, as he saw the blood stains on the floor.
He started to tremble and the fear he felt was exceeding everything he had ever known. He had never felt like this before. Just the imagination that this could be Kazuya’s or Natsuki’s made him want to lose it and crawl into a corner.
Nakagawa came back, on the phone again.
“Don’t touch anything”, he said to Jin who still stood like frozen.
Jin swallowed thickly. “Did you find her in there?”
Nakagawa shook his head. “She’s not here.”
“Do you even understand?” Jin approached him and gripped the collar of Nakagawa’s shirt. “She’s my daughter!”
“Akanishi, I understand.” Nakagawa gripped Jin’s hands. “They will search the house for her.”
Jin tried to calm down, but he failed, so he just pushed the detective away and walked into the living room. He scanned it with his eyes, said Natsuki’s name a few times, before he went over to the kitchen. He saw the open window, damaged at one side, and understood that he couldn’t shut it out anymore: Something had happened.
She wasn’t there either, so Jin dashed into the bathroom and their storage room, still repeating her name.
He felt his heart drop even more with every passing second and the fear that something could have happened to her, made him weak and at the same time, too angry to think.
Jin dashed past Nakagawa and climbed the stairs.
“Akanishi!” Nakagawa followed.
Natsuki’s room was empty, too. Mi-chan lay on her bed and she had put her coat to it. “She’s been here”, Jin murmured, as Nakagawa came in. “She wore this coat this morning.”
“Are you sure?”
Jin nodded. “Damn, I dress her every morning. I know that I picked this one.”
Nakagawa pulled Jin out of the room. “Don’t touch anything. Someone broke into this house, Akanishi.”
“And that someone took my daughter?” Jin shook his head. “God, I wish this was some of her games to…” Jin stopped and stared at the detective.
A light ray of hope lit up in him and he dashed to his room, yelling his daughter’s name. Jin opened the dressing room and his hands were numb, when he pushed aside the suits and opened the small cupboard.
Before he could register anything else, Natsuki lay in his arms and cried against his shoulder. He felt her warmth and the tears soaked his jacket and she held on to him with all might.
“Baby”, Jin breathed and wound his arms around her. His whole posture relaxed and he pressed kisses to her hair. “God, you’re safe.”
Nakagawa came into the dressing room and stared at them for a moment. Downstairs, noises were made, as a police team arrived.
“Natsuki”, Jin said and slowly pulled away to look at his daughter. He framed her face and scanned her body to make sure she wasn’t hurt. “Where is Kazuya?”
She bit her lip and shook her head. “He suddenly said I have to hide.”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Was someone in the house?”
Natsuki sniffled and her cheeks were red, her eyes swollen from the tears she had cried. “I was afraid! Kazu-nii said to stay in the cupboard until Papa would come to get me. You didn’t come.”
Jin took a shaky breath and pulled her in again. “I’m here now, baby”, he murmured. “I’m sorry.”
She nuzzled close to Jin and Jin threw a look at Nakagawa, as he got up and pressed Natsuki to his chest.
“I called an ambulance”, he said.
Jin nodded and sat down on his bed, Natsuki in his lap. “Baby, where did Kazuya go?”
She looked up at him and swallowed her tears. “He kissed me”, she answered then. “He said he loves me and gave me a real kiss. He said I have to stay inside there, no matter what, until Papa would find me. He called Papa’s name”, she added then.
Jin frowned and noticed Nakagawa took notes in a little book. “What do you mean?”
“Kazu-nii left the room, but I could hear him tell you that I was with grandma and grandpa. He lied, because I was here in my hideout.” She licked her lips and ran a hand over her cheek. “Then, everything was quiet.”
Jin glanced at the detective. “He didn’t come upstairs again?”
Natsuki shook her head. “Someone was upstairs and went into the rooms. He came into this room, too, but didn’t find me. It wasn’t Kazu-nii.”
“He was looking for her”, Nakagawa murmured.
Jin pulled Natsuki close again. “How do you know it wasn’t Kazuya?”
She nuzzled against Jin and her voice was only a whisper, as she answered: “He said my name, called for me to come out. It wasn’t Kazu-nii.”
Jin closed his eyes and pressed his lips to her hair. “No, that wasn’t him.”
She started to cry again. “Kazu-nii said to only leave, when Papa would come, so I didn’t answer.”
Jin felt it clench his heart tightly and he nodded. “That was right. I’m sorry you had to be in there for such a long time.”
Nakagawa was on the phone again and Jin gently cradled Natsuki in his arms. He wanted to calm her, but at the same time, he knew it was to calm him, too.
Now that Natsuki was safe in his arms, he realised that he had shut out what had happened to Kazuya. He had tried to tell himself that Natsuki and Kazuya would be here and that it had all been a mistake, a lie. But there had been blood on the floor downstairs and Kazuya had made sure to protect Natsuki from whoever had come after them.
Jin remembered Nakagawa’s face, as he had told Jin that he had identified the man in his flat.
It had been serious; his face had been serious and full of sympathy.
Jin couldn’t allow the logical consequence to enter his mind.
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa said, as he came back in. “The ambulance is here. Would you mind bringing her outside?”
Jin shook his head slowly and was afraid his knees wouldn’t take it, as he got up. But his feet moved themselves and he carried Natsuki downstairs and out into the cool evening air.
He entered the ambulance and a paramedic took care of Natsuki, while Jin held her hand. She was examined thoroughly and Jin blankly stared at her hand in his.
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa called him out then. “Do you have a minute?”
Jin nodded and pressed a kiss to Natsuki’s forehead. “I’ll be right over there.”
Nakagawa pressed his lips together and threw a glance at Natsuki. “We are pretty certain that Kamenashi was attacked here.”
Jin swallowed thickly and couldn’t say a word.
“Whoever did this would have taken the girl, too”, Nakagawa went on. “He obviously looked for her, too. Kamenashi’s act probably saved her life.”
Jin felt tears build up and he fought them back. God, this just couldn’t be true, he thought over and over again. “What happened to him?”
“We can only speculate at the moment.” Nakagawa shrugged. “Someone took today’s mail inside and we think it was Kamenashi. He and your daughter must have been upstairs, when someone broke into the house. Kamenashi acted quick, as he managed to hide the girl. Could he have anticipated something like this?”
Jin swallowed. “I should have anticipated it. I didn’t take it serious enough”, he answered.
“Did he get any more threats after that break-in into his flat?”
“A few”, Jin said. “They were all connected to me.”
Nakagawa nodded. “The break-in into your flat today has some indications that it’s the same person who broke into Kamenashi’s flat.”
Jin ran a hand over his face and raised his look to Nakagawa’s. “Where is he now?”
Nakagawa paused a moment. “He was in a bad state, when we found him. They brought him to the central hospital.”
Closing his yes, Jin pressed his lips together. “I have to call my parents to look after Natsuki”, he said. “I need to go and see him.”
Nakagawa nodded and handed him his mobile. “I hope he’ll be okay.”
Jin just gave a nod and took the mobile.
Thirty minutes later, he was assured that Natsuki was doing fine, that she had not even one scratch and that she was safe with his parents for the next few hours.
Then, Jin got into his car and drove to the central hospital, where Kazuya had been brought.
Nakagawa had given Jin a short overview that they had found Kazuya in his bedroom, as if he had been sleeping on the bed. However, he had been unconscious from several hits to the back of his head. Whoever had taken Kazuya there, had used the key Jin had given Kazuya and had placed him there, before setting the living room on fire with fuel. The fire hadn’t reached Kazuya, but he hadn’t been breathing anymore, when they had found him.
Jin still couldn’t believe it, as he parked his car and stared at the building.
He didn’t dare going on. After all, they could tell him that Kazuya couldn’t be saved. It had been hard to leave Natsuki alone, because having her safe had been the greatest relief, but Jin knew that he had to go here and see Kazuya.
But, Jin thought now and put his head to the steering wheel, losing Kazuya would be the worst. He had always thought that no one would ever get as important as Natsuki, but now, Kazuya had taken that place in his heart and the thought of losing him scared Jin as much as the thought of losing Natsuki.
How was he supposed to handle this?
Jin pressed his lips together and got out of the car and into the hospital.
He took a deep breath and asked the woman at the information counter for Kazuya.
She gave him a long look. “Are you a member of Kamenashi-san’s family?”
Jin stared at her for a moment. “What? I’m…”
She lifted a brow. “I can’t give you any information if you aren’t a family member.”
“Listen”, Jin said and leaned in. “I really have to see him. He’s…”
“Akanishi-san?”
Jin turned and looked at the doctor who approached him.
“I’m Yamada. Detective Nakagawa called me to let me know you would show up here.”
“I know I’m not a relative, but I really have to know how he’s doing. I understand, if you can’t let me see him”, Jin said, “but I have to know how he’s doing.”
Yamada smiled. “Would you please follow me?”
Jin followed without a second thought and got more and more insecure, as they reached the third station and he was led to a room. He could read Kazuya’s name next to the door and that alone let him breath calmer. It meant he was alive.
“Someone from the police is here”, the doctor said and looked at a man who sat in a chair behind Jin. Jin threw him a glance. “They say it’s just to be safe.”
Nodding, Jin turned back to the doctor.
“He had a serious smoke poisoning”, the doctor said. “And a bad concussion from the hits to his head. Everything else isn’t serious, just a few scratches. It’ll take some time to heal, though.”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Will he be okay?”
The doctor smiled gently and nodded. “We could fix him up. He’ll be okay.” He opened the door quietly. “You have twenty minutes. A nurse will come and get you.”
Jin nodded and went into the room.
It was quiet and all Jin could hear, were the beeping sounds of some machines that Kazuya was attached to.
Jin sat down on the stool next to the bed and stared at Kazuya. He was pale, his lips white and a bandage was wound around his head. There were still some trances of blood in his hair.
Jin swallowed thickly and reached out for Kazuya’s hand, as he kept staring at Kazuya’s lifeless face. He felt relief washing over him, because Kazuya’s hand was warm.
“Idiot”, Jin murmured and for the first time, since the police had come to tell him about the fire, he let his fear take over. He pressed his lips together and lowered his face, as tears started to stroll down his face.
“Damn you, Kazuya, for doing this to me.” Jin took a deep breath and held on tighter to Kazuya’s hand. “Why don’t you ever think of yourself?”
Jin knew that he couldn’t expect an answer, yet, he kept on talking for the remaining time; holding Kazuya’s hand, stroking his face, watching him sleep.
“I have to take this chance”, he murmured, as he had calmed down again. “Finally, you’re not talking back.”
He smiled slightly and ran his thumb over the back of Kazuya’s hand, watching him, as the door opened quietly and a nurse came in. “Akanishi-san, visiting time is over.”
Jin nodded and got up from the stool, still holding Kazuya’s hand. “I’ll be back tomorrow.”
He left the room and got to his car, taking a deep breath.
“Damn”, he mumbled and closed his eyes for a moment. Suddenly, Jin felt extremely tired, but he knew he couldn’t go home yet.
He still had something to do.
As he started the car, he dialled in his parents’ number and drove down the road. He asked for Natsuki and how she was doing, before he told his parents that he would be back in an hour.
Merely ten minutes later, Jin stood at the reception of Fairy View and waited for Ueda.
“Akanishi”, Ueda greeted him, as Jin was led into his office. “What an unusual time to come for a visit.”
“We need to talk”, Jin just said and closed the door.
Ueda frowned. “I suppose it’s about Kazuya.”
Jin nodded. “When did you see him the last time?”
“On our trip to New York”, Ueda answered. “Before you came to occupy him.”
Jin bit his lip. “Did he say anything about some threats?”
For a moment, Ueda watched Jin, saw the tired eyes and posture. “What happened?”
Jin looked at the chair. “Would you mind, if I sat down?”
Ueda gestured for him to sit and leaned in then.
“He almost died”, Jin murmured. “He almost died this evening.”
For a moment, silent stretched between them and Ueda looked honestly affected.
“How?” Ueda’s voice sounded surprised, shocked. “What happened?”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Someone hit him unconscious and lay a fire in my flat. Kazuya almost suffocated in there.” He raised his head and gave Ueda a pleading look. “You know something, don’t you? If you do, you have to tell me. You just have to”, Jin added.
Ueda shook his head. “I made Kazuya believe I would know something.”
Jin buried his face in his hands and took a deep breath. “What do you mean?”
“I told him I’d know what danger he was in, because I wanted him to turn away from you.” Ueda leaned back. “I didn’t think it would really come this far.”
“So, you don’t know who is after him.” Jin looked at the desk.
“I knew he got threats and that someone else was watching him”, Ueda admitted. “And I knew it was about you.”
“It’s my fault”, Jin said quietly.
“You don’t expect me to deny that now, do you?”
Jin looked up. “No, I don’t.” He got up again. “I’m sorry.”
“I just wanted to keep this from happening. I knew he would get into trouble for being together with you.” Ueda got up, too and gave Jin a long, cold look. “But, for ignoring the danger, it’s his own fault.”
“I have to go”, Jin just said.
Ueda didn’t say any more and sat down again, as Jin walked back outside.
Jin’s mind was completely blank, as he got home. Natsuki was in his arms and had fallen asleep already. Jin opened her shoes and just let them slip down, before he walked upstairs and lay down on his bed. Natsuki curled up on the pillow and Jin pulled her close, buried his face in her hair.
While Natsuki slept in his arms, Jin listened to the sounds of the night and couldn’t find any sleep.
His thoughts were still occupied with the events of the night, with what he had seen and heard. He noticed that he hadn’t even looked at the flat and that he’d have to talk to the police again.
While all those things went through his head, the only image that always again popped up in front of his eyes, was Kazuya’s lifeless, pale face.
He couldn’t forget, couldn’t shut it out.
It was Jin’s fault.
Natsuki didn’t want to celebrate her birthday.
Jin decided that she wouldn’t go to preschool that day and while he was in the hotel, he had her stay with his parents again.
In the evening, he visited Kazuya again, but, just like the day before, he was still unconscious and Jin couldn’t stand the sight anymore.
He still stayed the twenty minutes, but this time, he didn’t say a single word. Instead, Jin just watched Kazuya and remembered every detail of his face.
As he came back home, he took out Natsuki for dinner to make the day just a bit special.
He told her what was going on, left out a few details, though. But Jin wanted her to know, it wouldn’t make sense to lie about it.
On Saturday, Jin came to the hospital early in the morning.
He hadn’t slept well that night, either and gave Kazuya a tired look, as he stood next to the bed.
“God, you’re catching up on sleep quite a bit, don’t you?” Jin smiled slightly and took Kazuya’s hand.
Kazuya slightly moved his head and he returned the light squeeze of Jin’s hand.
Jin blinked his eyes and stared at Kazuya’s face, as he opened his eyes.
Kazuya stared at the ceiling for a moment and then, threw confused looks around, before he spotted Jin and frowned.
“Hey, pretty”, Jin murmured and felt his heart beating fast. “Hey there.”
Kazuya frowned deeper and coughed slightly, as he tried to speak. “Did I have a car accident?”
Jin stared at him for a moment, before he sat down and took a deep breath. “You don’t remember”, he noted.
Kazuya tiredly looked at him and for a moment, his look was confused, before suddenly, his eyes widened.
“Natsuki?”
Jin smiled slightly and pulled Kazuya’s hand between his own hands and to his lips. “Nothing happened to her.”
Kazuya closed his eyes in relief. “I didn’t see him”, he said then. “Suddenly, everything went black.”
“You made sure to protect my daughter, Kazuya”, Jin murmured. “And you almost paid it with your life.”
Frowning, Kazuya watched Jin’s face. “What on earth happened?”
With a calm voice, Jin told him everything, without looking at his face once.
Kazuya moved his fingers between Jin’s. “Thank God, she listened to me and stayed inside.”
“Hm”, Jin murmured. “There’s no way in life I could ever pay back what you did”, he said then.
Kazuya shook his head slightly. “There’s nothing to pay back for.”
Jin laughed bitterly. “I guess you don’t get this”, he answered. “You almost died.”
“But it’s rather me than Natsuki”, Kazuya said with a hoarse voice.
“I liked it better when you didn’t talk back all the time.”
Kazuya smiled.
“And you know, my daughter’s too young to be kissed on the lips. Just so you know”, he said to distract himself from the knot in his chest.
“I’m probably a bit too old for her”, Kazuya answered.
Jin pressed his lips together and lowered his head; put his forehead onto their laced fingers. He closed his eyes and cursed silently.
Kazuya watched him for a moment, before he tried to put his free hand to Jin’s hair. He couldn’t move too well, though, so he rested his hand in his lap.
“Jin, it’s okay”, he murmured.
“Nothing is okay, Kazuya”, Jin answered, without lifting his head. “You’re not the one in danger, huh?” His voice was angry. “Are you kidding me?”
“Jin…”
They both looked up, as a nurse came in. “Akanishi-san, it’s…” She stopped and stared at Kazuya. “Kamenashi-san, you’re awake!” She hurried inside and checked all his functions. Then, she glanced at Jin. “You should have called for us immediately, as he woke up.” With that, she hurried out of the room again to get a doctor.
Jin looked at Kazuya. “Looks like I’ll have to leave now.”
Kazuya nodded. “I’m pretty tired, anyway.”
“The police will come to ask you.” Jin still held Kazuya’s hand. “Would you like me to stay with you then?”
Kazuya frowned and looked at the wall. “What day is it?”
“Saturday.”
Kazuya blinked his eyes once. “Wow, I caught up on sleep, didn’t I?” He smiled. “You planned to go to the amusement park with Natsuki today.”
Jin shook his head. “No one’s really in the mood for that stuff.”
“She’ll love it”, Kazuya said. “Give her some distraction.”
Jin swallowed and wanted to say something, as a doctor came inside, followed by the nurse.
“We have to ask you to leave. Kamenashi-san will have some check-ups now.”
Jin nodded and for the first time, he looked at Kazuya’s face. It hit him again, seeing the worn-out pale face, the tired eyes. He forced a smile to his lips. “I’ll be back, pretty.”
“I don’t think I’m that pretty right now”, Kazuya answered, his voice quiet.
Jin managed another smile and squeezed his hand again, before he turned away.
From outside, he watched the doctor lean over Kazuya and as the door was closed, he turned and went down the floor.
He hadn’t even said sorry, Jin thought now.
He had sat there and had said so many things, had even gotten angry with Kazuya; but he hadn’t said sorry once.
It had been just too hard to even say anything, seeing Kazuya was that weak.
Everything was out of order. Kazuya was even too weak to raise his own hand and Jin had been too weak to speak his mind.
It was Kazuya, after all, he thought and stared back over his shoulder.
They’ve never been completely honest with each other; they had always struggled with lies and unfaithfulness.
But this time around, admitting the truth, telling Kazuya what was on his heart, would have been the only right thing to do. It was the only fair thing Jin could do, after everything that had happened.
Jin had ignored all signs and in the end, Kazuya had paid for that. Jin owed him some honesty.
And if he was honest - to Kazuya and to himself - then, there was only one thing Jin could do.
He had to let go of Kazuya.
-------------------------------------------
Thank you so much for reading and Happy Easter to everyone ♥
Pairing: Akanishi Jin x Kazuya Kamenashi //Akame//
Genre: Romance, AU
Rating: PG-13 and up.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story. I don't make profit with this.
Summary: The first impression counts and Kazuya's first impression of Jin is not the best. However, Jin is determined to get to know Kazuya - and Kazuya makes up a few lies, which suddenly become huge... And then, the tide is turning.
A/N: English isn't my mother tongue, but I lived in the UK for quite a time, so I basically write and speak well. You're welcome to correct any mistakes, though. Of course.
Now, I could say that Amafurase Tanmaina line again, but honestly, now that it's finally spring, I rather listen to it and then, saying it, really is fast! *lol*
Anyways, here's the new chap and most of your questions are answered. What happened to Kazuya and could he protect Natsuki after all?
Please enjoy it :) ♥
Previous Chapters:
First Lie: Who am I?
Second Lie: Find Me
Third Lie: Exposed
Fourth Lie: On Repeat
Fifth Lie: More of You
Sixth Lie: Not My Fault
Seventh Lie: Out of Reach
Eighth Lie: Leaving You
Ninth Lie: Hold On
Tenth Lie: Secret
Eleventh Lie: Broken Lovers
Twelfth Lie: Worry About You
Thirteenth Lie: I Won't
Fourteenth Lie: Only My Illursion
Fifteenth Lie: Heavy Damage
Sixteenth Lie: Too Close
“Excuse me”, Nakagawa said. “Who?”
Jin ran a hand through his hair and felt it trembling. “Natsuki was supposed to be with Kazuya.”
The detective frowned. “Who is that?”
Jin swallowed thickly. “My daughter. Kazuya had picked her up from preschool today and they were supposed to be together”, Jin answered. Then, he felt something inside him break. “Where is Kazuya?”
Nakagawa gave him a sympathising look. “Listen, Akanishi….”
“No”, Jin said. The possibility that Kazuya had been in that fire was out of question. It couldn’t be. “He’s with my daughter. They are at my house.”
The detective exchanged a look with his colleague. “You have a house?”
Jin nodded. “Yes. Kazuya and Natsuki are there right now.” He picked up the phone on his desk and dialled in the number. Jin’s expression got empty, as it kept ringing.
“Akanishi, we really need you to come to the station and….”
“Natsuki”, Jin just said. “I can’t go anywhere if Natsuki’s missing.”
Nakagawa got out his mobile. “Give me the address. We will send someone to check on the house.”
Jin told him, then, he took his jacket and his keys. “I have to go.”
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa yelled.
“I have to find my daughter”, Jin said and dashed out of the room.
Nakagawa had caught up in an instant. “We really need you to come to the station. Kamenashi is…”
Jin stopped and stared at him with fierce eyes. “Kazuya is with Natsuki. And I am going to check on them now.”
Nakagawa looked after Jin for a moment. Then, he got out his mobile again and informed the station that he would follow Jin.
Jin got into his car and noticed that a car escorted him, but didn’t really pay attention. He ignored all speed limits and as he arrived at his house, he let go of his breath.
Kazuya’s car was still parked in his slip road.
Jin parked his behind Kazuya’s and got out the car.
“Look”, he said to the detective who approached him quickly. “His car is here.”
Nakagawa frowned and again, got out his mobile. “I need more people here. This is rather suspicious. Akanishi, wait!” He followed Jin and pushed him aside a bit, before Jin could just open up the door.
“Someone could be still inside.”
Jin gave him a confused look, but didn’t say anything, as Nakagawa slowly pressed down the handle and found the door unlocked.
Nakagawa walked in first and peeked through the entrance, before he approached the kitchen.
Jin followed and he felt his heart skip a beat, as he saw the blood stains on the floor.
He started to tremble and the fear he felt was exceeding everything he had ever known. He had never felt like this before. Just the imagination that this could be Kazuya’s or Natsuki’s made him want to lose it and crawl into a corner.
Nakagawa came back, on the phone again.
“Don’t touch anything”, he said to Jin who still stood like frozen.
Jin swallowed thickly. “Did you find her in there?”
Nakagawa shook his head. “She’s not here.”
“Do you even understand?” Jin approached him and gripped the collar of Nakagawa’s shirt. “She’s my daughter!”
“Akanishi, I understand.” Nakagawa gripped Jin’s hands. “They will search the house for her.”
Jin tried to calm down, but he failed, so he just pushed the detective away and walked into the living room. He scanned it with his eyes, said Natsuki’s name a few times, before he went over to the kitchen. He saw the open window, damaged at one side, and understood that he couldn’t shut it out anymore: Something had happened.
She wasn’t there either, so Jin dashed into the bathroom and their storage room, still repeating her name.
He felt his heart drop even more with every passing second and the fear that something could have happened to her, made him weak and at the same time, too angry to think.
Jin dashed past Nakagawa and climbed the stairs.
“Akanishi!” Nakagawa followed.
Natsuki’s room was empty, too. Mi-chan lay on her bed and she had put her coat to it. “She’s been here”, Jin murmured, as Nakagawa came in. “She wore this coat this morning.”
“Are you sure?”
Jin nodded. “Damn, I dress her every morning. I know that I picked this one.”
Nakagawa pulled Jin out of the room. “Don’t touch anything. Someone broke into this house, Akanishi.”
“And that someone took my daughter?” Jin shook his head. “God, I wish this was some of her games to…” Jin stopped and stared at the detective.
A light ray of hope lit up in him and he dashed to his room, yelling his daughter’s name. Jin opened the dressing room and his hands were numb, when he pushed aside the suits and opened the small cupboard.
Before he could register anything else, Natsuki lay in his arms and cried against his shoulder. He felt her warmth and the tears soaked his jacket and she held on to him with all might.
“Baby”, Jin breathed and wound his arms around her. His whole posture relaxed and he pressed kisses to her hair. “God, you’re safe.”
Nakagawa came into the dressing room and stared at them for a moment. Downstairs, noises were made, as a police team arrived.
“Natsuki”, Jin said and slowly pulled away to look at his daughter. He framed her face and scanned her body to make sure she wasn’t hurt. “Where is Kazuya?”
She bit her lip and shook her head. “He suddenly said I have to hide.”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Was someone in the house?”
Natsuki sniffled and her cheeks were red, her eyes swollen from the tears she had cried. “I was afraid! Kazu-nii said to stay in the cupboard until Papa would come to get me. You didn’t come.”
Jin took a shaky breath and pulled her in again. “I’m here now, baby”, he murmured. “I’m sorry.”
She nuzzled close to Jin and Jin threw a look at Nakagawa, as he got up and pressed Natsuki to his chest.
“I called an ambulance”, he said.
Jin nodded and sat down on his bed, Natsuki in his lap. “Baby, where did Kazuya go?”
She looked up at him and swallowed her tears. “He kissed me”, she answered then. “He said he loves me and gave me a real kiss. He said I have to stay inside there, no matter what, until Papa would find me. He called Papa’s name”, she added then.
Jin frowned and noticed Nakagawa took notes in a little book. “What do you mean?”
“Kazu-nii left the room, but I could hear him tell you that I was with grandma and grandpa. He lied, because I was here in my hideout.” She licked her lips and ran a hand over her cheek. “Then, everything was quiet.”
Jin glanced at the detective. “He didn’t come upstairs again?”
Natsuki shook her head. “Someone was upstairs and went into the rooms. He came into this room, too, but didn’t find me. It wasn’t Kazu-nii.”
“He was looking for her”, Nakagawa murmured.
Jin pulled Natsuki close again. “How do you know it wasn’t Kazuya?”
She nuzzled against Jin and her voice was only a whisper, as she answered: “He said my name, called for me to come out. It wasn’t Kazu-nii.”
Jin closed his eyes and pressed his lips to her hair. “No, that wasn’t him.”
She started to cry again. “Kazu-nii said to only leave, when Papa would come, so I didn’t answer.”
Jin felt it clench his heart tightly and he nodded. “That was right. I’m sorry you had to be in there for such a long time.”
Nakagawa was on the phone again and Jin gently cradled Natsuki in his arms. He wanted to calm her, but at the same time, he knew it was to calm him, too.
Now that Natsuki was safe in his arms, he realised that he had shut out what had happened to Kazuya. He had tried to tell himself that Natsuki and Kazuya would be here and that it had all been a mistake, a lie. But there had been blood on the floor downstairs and Kazuya had made sure to protect Natsuki from whoever had come after them.
Jin remembered Nakagawa’s face, as he had told Jin that he had identified the man in his flat.
It had been serious; his face had been serious and full of sympathy.
Jin couldn’t allow the logical consequence to enter his mind.
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa said, as he came back in. “The ambulance is here. Would you mind bringing her outside?”
Jin shook his head slowly and was afraid his knees wouldn’t take it, as he got up. But his feet moved themselves and he carried Natsuki downstairs and out into the cool evening air.
He entered the ambulance and a paramedic took care of Natsuki, while Jin held her hand. She was examined thoroughly and Jin blankly stared at her hand in his.
“Akanishi”, Nakagawa called him out then. “Do you have a minute?”
Jin nodded and pressed a kiss to Natsuki’s forehead. “I’ll be right over there.”
Nakagawa pressed his lips together and threw a glance at Natsuki. “We are pretty certain that Kamenashi was attacked here.”
Jin swallowed thickly and couldn’t say a word.
“Whoever did this would have taken the girl, too”, Nakagawa went on. “He obviously looked for her, too. Kamenashi’s act probably saved her life.”
Jin felt tears build up and he fought them back. God, this just couldn’t be true, he thought over and over again. “What happened to him?”
“We can only speculate at the moment.” Nakagawa shrugged. “Someone took today’s mail inside and we think it was Kamenashi. He and your daughter must have been upstairs, when someone broke into the house. Kamenashi acted quick, as he managed to hide the girl. Could he have anticipated something like this?”
Jin swallowed. “I should have anticipated it. I didn’t take it serious enough”, he answered.
“Did he get any more threats after that break-in into his flat?”
“A few”, Jin said. “They were all connected to me.”
Nakagawa nodded. “The break-in into your flat today has some indications that it’s the same person who broke into Kamenashi’s flat.”
Jin ran a hand over his face and raised his look to Nakagawa’s. “Where is he now?”
Nakagawa paused a moment. “He was in a bad state, when we found him. They brought him to the central hospital.”
Closing his yes, Jin pressed his lips together. “I have to call my parents to look after Natsuki”, he said. “I need to go and see him.”
Nakagawa nodded and handed him his mobile. “I hope he’ll be okay.”
Jin just gave a nod and took the mobile.
Thirty minutes later, he was assured that Natsuki was doing fine, that she had not even one scratch and that she was safe with his parents for the next few hours.
Then, Jin got into his car and drove to the central hospital, where Kazuya had been brought.
Nakagawa had given Jin a short overview that they had found Kazuya in his bedroom, as if he had been sleeping on the bed. However, he had been unconscious from several hits to the back of his head. Whoever had taken Kazuya there, had used the key Jin had given Kazuya and had placed him there, before setting the living room on fire with fuel. The fire hadn’t reached Kazuya, but he hadn’t been breathing anymore, when they had found him.
Jin still couldn’t believe it, as he parked his car and stared at the building.
He didn’t dare going on. After all, they could tell him that Kazuya couldn’t be saved. It had been hard to leave Natsuki alone, because having her safe had been the greatest relief, but Jin knew that he had to go here and see Kazuya.
But, Jin thought now and put his head to the steering wheel, losing Kazuya would be the worst. He had always thought that no one would ever get as important as Natsuki, but now, Kazuya had taken that place in his heart and the thought of losing him scared Jin as much as the thought of losing Natsuki.
How was he supposed to handle this?
Jin pressed his lips together and got out of the car and into the hospital.
He took a deep breath and asked the woman at the information counter for Kazuya.
She gave him a long look. “Are you a member of Kamenashi-san’s family?”
Jin stared at her for a moment. “What? I’m…”
She lifted a brow. “I can’t give you any information if you aren’t a family member.”
“Listen”, Jin said and leaned in. “I really have to see him. He’s…”
“Akanishi-san?”
Jin turned and looked at the doctor who approached him.
“I’m Yamada. Detective Nakagawa called me to let me know you would show up here.”
“I know I’m not a relative, but I really have to know how he’s doing. I understand, if you can’t let me see him”, Jin said, “but I have to know how he’s doing.”
Yamada smiled. “Would you please follow me?”
Jin followed without a second thought and got more and more insecure, as they reached the third station and he was led to a room. He could read Kazuya’s name next to the door and that alone let him breath calmer. It meant he was alive.
“Someone from the police is here”, the doctor said and looked at a man who sat in a chair behind Jin. Jin threw him a glance. “They say it’s just to be safe.”
Nodding, Jin turned back to the doctor.
“He had a serious smoke poisoning”, the doctor said. “And a bad concussion from the hits to his head. Everything else isn’t serious, just a few scratches. It’ll take some time to heal, though.”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Will he be okay?”
The doctor smiled gently and nodded. “We could fix him up. He’ll be okay.” He opened the door quietly. “You have twenty minutes. A nurse will come and get you.”
Jin nodded and went into the room.
It was quiet and all Jin could hear, were the beeping sounds of some machines that Kazuya was attached to.
Jin sat down on the stool next to the bed and stared at Kazuya. He was pale, his lips white and a bandage was wound around his head. There were still some trances of blood in his hair.
Jin swallowed thickly and reached out for Kazuya’s hand, as he kept staring at Kazuya’s lifeless face. He felt relief washing over him, because Kazuya’s hand was warm.
“Idiot”, Jin murmured and for the first time, since the police had come to tell him about the fire, he let his fear take over. He pressed his lips together and lowered his face, as tears started to stroll down his face.
“Damn you, Kazuya, for doing this to me.” Jin took a deep breath and held on tighter to Kazuya’s hand. “Why don’t you ever think of yourself?”
Jin knew that he couldn’t expect an answer, yet, he kept on talking for the remaining time; holding Kazuya’s hand, stroking his face, watching him sleep.
“I have to take this chance”, he murmured, as he had calmed down again. “Finally, you’re not talking back.”
He smiled slightly and ran his thumb over the back of Kazuya’s hand, watching him, as the door opened quietly and a nurse came in. “Akanishi-san, visiting time is over.”
Jin nodded and got up from the stool, still holding Kazuya’s hand. “I’ll be back tomorrow.”
He left the room and got to his car, taking a deep breath.
“Damn”, he mumbled and closed his eyes for a moment. Suddenly, Jin felt extremely tired, but he knew he couldn’t go home yet.
He still had something to do.
As he started the car, he dialled in his parents’ number and drove down the road. He asked for Natsuki and how she was doing, before he told his parents that he would be back in an hour.
Merely ten minutes later, Jin stood at the reception of Fairy View and waited for Ueda.
“Akanishi”, Ueda greeted him, as Jin was led into his office. “What an unusual time to come for a visit.”
“We need to talk”, Jin just said and closed the door.
Ueda frowned. “I suppose it’s about Kazuya.”
Jin nodded. “When did you see him the last time?”
“On our trip to New York”, Ueda answered. “Before you came to occupy him.”
Jin bit his lip. “Did he say anything about some threats?”
For a moment, Ueda watched Jin, saw the tired eyes and posture. “What happened?”
Jin looked at the chair. “Would you mind, if I sat down?”
Ueda gestured for him to sit and leaned in then.
“He almost died”, Jin murmured. “He almost died this evening.”
For a moment, silent stretched between them and Ueda looked honestly affected.
“How?” Ueda’s voice sounded surprised, shocked. “What happened?”
Jin swallowed thickly. “Someone hit him unconscious and lay a fire in my flat. Kazuya almost suffocated in there.” He raised his head and gave Ueda a pleading look. “You know something, don’t you? If you do, you have to tell me. You just have to”, Jin added.
Ueda shook his head. “I made Kazuya believe I would know something.”
Jin buried his face in his hands and took a deep breath. “What do you mean?”
“I told him I’d know what danger he was in, because I wanted him to turn away from you.” Ueda leaned back. “I didn’t think it would really come this far.”
“So, you don’t know who is after him.” Jin looked at the desk.
“I knew he got threats and that someone else was watching him”, Ueda admitted. “And I knew it was about you.”
“It’s my fault”, Jin said quietly.
“You don’t expect me to deny that now, do you?”
Jin looked up. “No, I don’t.” He got up again. “I’m sorry.”
“I just wanted to keep this from happening. I knew he would get into trouble for being together with you.” Ueda got up, too and gave Jin a long, cold look. “But, for ignoring the danger, it’s his own fault.”
“I have to go”, Jin just said.
Ueda didn’t say any more and sat down again, as Jin walked back outside.
Jin’s mind was completely blank, as he got home. Natsuki was in his arms and had fallen asleep already. Jin opened her shoes and just let them slip down, before he walked upstairs and lay down on his bed. Natsuki curled up on the pillow and Jin pulled her close, buried his face in her hair.
While Natsuki slept in his arms, Jin listened to the sounds of the night and couldn’t find any sleep.
His thoughts were still occupied with the events of the night, with what he had seen and heard. He noticed that he hadn’t even looked at the flat and that he’d have to talk to the police again.
While all those things went through his head, the only image that always again popped up in front of his eyes, was Kazuya’s lifeless, pale face.
He couldn’t forget, couldn’t shut it out.
It was Jin’s fault.
Natsuki didn’t want to celebrate her birthday.
Jin decided that she wouldn’t go to preschool that day and while he was in the hotel, he had her stay with his parents again.
In the evening, he visited Kazuya again, but, just like the day before, he was still unconscious and Jin couldn’t stand the sight anymore.
He still stayed the twenty minutes, but this time, he didn’t say a single word. Instead, Jin just watched Kazuya and remembered every detail of his face.
As he came back home, he took out Natsuki for dinner to make the day just a bit special.
He told her what was going on, left out a few details, though. But Jin wanted her to know, it wouldn’t make sense to lie about it.
On Saturday, Jin came to the hospital early in the morning.
He hadn’t slept well that night, either and gave Kazuya a tired look, as he stood next to the bed.
“God, you’re catching up on sleep quite a bit, don’t you?” Jin smiled slightly and took Kazuya’s hand.
Kazuya slightly moved his head and he returned the light squeeze of Jin’s hand.
Jin blinked his eyes and stared at Kazuya’s face, as he opened his eyes.
Kazuya stared at the ceiling for a moment and then, threw confused looks around, before he spotted Jin and frowned.
“Hey, pretty”, Jin murmured and felt his heart beating fast. “Hey there.”
Kazuya frowned deeper and coughed slightly, as he tried to speak. “Did I have a car accident?”
Jin stared at him for a moment, before he sat down and took a deep breath. “You don’t remember”, he noted.
Kazuya tiredly looked at him and for a moment, his look was confused, before suddenly, his eyes widened.
“Natsuki?”
Jin smiled slightly and pulled Kazuya’s hand between his own hands and to his lips. “Nothing happened to her.”
Kazuya closed his eyes in relief. “I didn’t see him”, he said then. “Suddenly, everything went black.”
“You made sure to protect my daughter, Kazuya”, Jin murmured. “And you almost paid it with your life.”
Frowning, Kazuya watched Jin’s face. “What on earth happened?”
With a calm voice, Jin told him everything, without looking at his face once.
Kazuya moved his fingers between Jin’s. “Thank God, she listened to me and stayed inside.”
“Hm”, Jin murmured. “There’s no way in life I could ever pay back what you did”, he said then.
Kazuya shook his head slightly. “There’s nothing to pay back for.”
Jin laughed bitterly. “I guess you don’t get this”, he answered. “You almost died.”
“But it’s rather me than Natsuki”, Kazuya said with a hoarse voice.
“I liked it better when you didn’t talk back all the time.”
Kazuya smiled.
“And you know, my daughter’s too young to be kissed on the lips. Just so you know”, he said to distract himself from the knot in his chest.
“I’m probably a bit too old for her”, Kazuya answered.
Jin pressed his lips together and lowered his head; put his forehead onto their laced fingers. He closed his eyes and cursed silently.
Kazuya watched him for a moment, before he tried to put his free hand to Jin’s hair. He couldn’t move too well, though, so he rested his hand in his lap.
“Jin, it’s okay”, he murmured.
“Nothing is okay, Kazuya”, Jin answered, without lifting his head. “You’re not the one in danger, huh?” His voice was angry. “Are you kidding me?”
“Jin…”
They both looked up, as a nurse came in. “Akanishi-san, it’s…” She stopped and stared at Kazuya. “Kamenashi-san, you’re awake!” She hurried inside and checked all his functions. Then, she glanced at Jin. “You should have called for us immediately, as he woke up.” With that, she hurried out of the room again to get a doctor.
Jin looked at Kazuya. “Looks like I’ll have to leave now.”
Kazuya nodded. “I’m pretty tired, anyway.”
“The police will come to ask you.” Jin still held Kazuya’s hand. “Would you like me to stay with you then?”
Kazuya frowned and looked at the wall. “What day is it?”
“Saturday.”
Kazuya blinked his eyes once. “Wow, I caught up on sleep, didn’t I?” He smiled. “You planned to go to the amusement park with Natsuki today.”
Jin shook his head. “No one’s really in the mood for that stuff.”
“She’ll love it”, Kazuya said. “Give her some distraction.”
Jin swallowed and wanted to say something, as a doctor came inside, followed by the nurse.
“We have to ask you to leave. Kamenashi-san will have some check-ups now.”
Jin nodded and for the first time, he looked at Kazuya’s face. It hit him again, seeing the worn-out pale face, the tired eyes. He forced a smile to his lips. “I’ll be back, pretty.”
“I don’t think I’m that pretty right now”, Kazuya answered, his voice quiet.
Jin managed another smile and squeezed his hand again, before he turned away.
From outside, he watched the doctor lean over Kazuya and as the door was closed, he turned and went down the floor.
He hadn’t even said sorry, Jin thought now.
He had sat there and had said so many things, had even gotten angry with Kazuya; but he hadn’t said sorry once.
It had been just too hard to even say anything, seeing Kazuya was that weak.
Everything was out of order. Kazuya was even too weak to raise his own hand and Jin had been too weak to speak his mind.
It was Kazuya, after all, he thought and stared back over his shoulder.
They’ve never been completely honest with each other; they had always struggled with lies and unfaithfulness.
But this time around, admitting the truth, telling Kazuya what was on his heart, would have been the only right thing to do. It was the only fair thing Jin could do, after everything that had happened.
Jin had ignored all signs and in the end, Kazuya had paid for that. Jin owed him some honesty.
And if he was honest - to Kazuya and to himself - then, there was only one thing Jin could do.
He had to let go of Kazuya.
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Thank you so much for reading and Happy Easter to everyone ♥