i just don't know
i am sitting at school in between classes right now. i decided to look at my ex-bf's myspace.com page. i do this once in a while lately, though i have never found anything incriminating. there is this new girl sending him messages...Megan. so i checked her page...and i looked at her pictures...
there is a picture of her and my ex together sitting on his bed. the bed we used to sleep on together. i think he used my camera to take the picture too. this doesn't really make sense though cuz he said there was this other girl that he likes and her name is Rhianna and she is 18. this Megan girl is 18, but her name is Megan, not Rhianna. i am so confused. this girl looked so happy to be taking a picture with my ex...
the ex that still sleeps over my house, the ex that i have slept in the same bed with a few times lately, the ex that loves to hug me and give me kisses on the cheek and forehead, the ex that still tells me he loves me, the ex that still tells me he misses me...but on top of all this, the ex that tells me he could never make love to me again without puking cuz of what i supposedly did and then is all over me and touching me and trying to get in me, the ex that spends a bunch of time with this new girl and then still asks if he can sleepover my house or tells me he wants to hang out...
i told him that i don't feel comfortable with the fact that he very well could be doing sexual things, or at least trying to, with the both of us and i am damn sure not ok with that...he stopped trying to get in my pants...
i still love him, but i am happy being by myself. i guess you could say i just want all the attention focused on me. i want things to go back to how they used to be, but with the freedom of not having that bf/gf title again. can't have that though i suppose. i just get so upset when i see him happy with other girls or texting other girls on his phone. what is there to do?
but on a better note, i should be get cable internet in my room soon so i will be online all the time...just maybe not always in front of the computer. then i can actually regularly and shit.
god DAMMIT!!!!!!!
there is a picture of her and my ex together sitting on his bed. the bed we used to sleep on together. i think he used my camera to take the picture too. this doesn't really make sense though cuz he said there was this other girl that he likes and her name is Rhianna and she is 18. this Megan girl is 18, but her name is Megan, not Rhianna. i am so confused. this girl looked so happy to be taking a picture with my ex...
the ex that still sleeps over my house, the ex that i have slept in the same bed with a few times lately, the ex that loves to hug me and give me kisses on the cheek and forehead, the ex that still tells me he loves me, the ex that still tells me he misses me...but on top of all this, the ex that tells me he could never make love to me again without puking cuz of what i supposedly did and then is all over me and touching me and trying to get in me, the ex that spends a bunch of time with this new girl and then still asks if he can sleepover my house or tells me he wants to hang out...
i told him that i don't feel comfortable with the fact that he very well could be doing sexual things, or at least trying to, with the both of us and i am damn sure not ok with that...he stopped trying to get in my pants...
i still love him, but i am happy being by myself. i guess you could say i just want all the attention focused on me. i want things to go back to how they used to be, but with the freedom of not having that bf/gf title again. can't have that though i suppose. i just get so upset when i see him happy with other girls or texting other girls on his phone. what is there to do?
but on a better note, i should be get cable internet in my room soon so i will be online all the time...just maybe not always in front of the computer. then i can actually regularly and shit.
god DAMMIT!!!!!!!