(no subject)
My body is aching like crap after throwing the football around yesterday. I'm such a wimp.
I also lack the energy to do ...ANYTHING... today. Got into work late, and want to leave early. I feel invisible here... except to the receptionist, who calls me whenever she needs a smoke break. I don't know... It only grows harder and harder to find the motivation to come here, once again. I understand that the more I come in late, the longer I take to do a task, the more responsibility I'm getting taken away from me. But this is hopeless. It's come to a point where it's unbearable. My mom asked Steven to call me this morning to see if I was still alive. Wow. After ignoring my calls on Saturday morning/afternoon... I don't know what to make of that. I sort of brushed it off and continued with my day. Steven doesn't even speak to me much at all, and he's the only one who I'm really near... I don't know what's worse... He and I bickering/giving each other a hard time, or just having no one to talk to at all.
It's hard to motivate yourself in the dry spells... and especially when it seems everyone else is flourishing all around you. A raise here and there, my own brother is self-proclaimed 'manager; of the Meridian center in Miami Beach... one of our projects that he merely does what multiple higher-ups tell him to. Gets here at 6:30 in the morning to take a nap before anyone else gets here, farts around and disappears most of the day, only to clock out when he gets back from the gym. Ugh. I can only roll my eyes and ignore the situation, because I'm done trying to fight that battle. I'm happy that we're finally starting to get a long, and I'd rather it stay that way for as long as I can stretch it.
I really want that car... My beloved Passat. I don't know what that will do to turn my life around, but sometimes things spark the most unexpected changes in people. I'm hoping that if I get this car, that it will inspire me to want to keep things in check, that I will be expected to make these payments and really get my credit score on the map. There are a lot of things that I WANT, not necessarily need... But sometimes you just need some sugar to make yourself sweeter. Positive reinforcement? The way my credit stands right now, I could probably get myself a good amount of things... But I am really serious about this car. *sigh*...It almost makes me sad. =(
An appointment has been made to get an estimate on the reupholstering of my backseat... In hopes that it'll make it more appealing and thusly, get more from the trade-in towards the Passat. I guess it's a way to get the ball rolling. Guess we'll just have to see what happens.
I want to get out of here soon. This bad weather is making me sleepy.
I also lack the energy to do ...ANYTHING... today. Got into work late, and want to leave early. I feel invisible here... except to the receptionist, who calls me whenever she needs a smoke break. I don't know... It only grows harder and harder to find the motivation to come here, once again. I understand that the more I come in late, the longer I take to do a task, the more responsibility I'm getting taken away from me. But this is hopeless. It's come to a point where it's unbearable. My mom asked Steven to call me this morning to see if I was still alive. Wow. After ignoring my calls on Saturday morning/afternoon... I don't know what to make of that. I sort of brushed it off and continued with my day. Steven doesn't even speak to me much at all, and he's the only one who I'm really near... I don't know what's worse... He and I bickering/giving each other a hard time, or just having no one to talk to at all.
It's hard to motivate yourself in the dry spells... and especially when it seems everyone else is flourishing all around you. A raise here and there, my own brother is self-proclaimed 'manager; of the Meridian center in Miami Beach... one of our projects that he merely does what multiple higher-ups tell him to. Gets here at 6:30 in the morning to take a nap before anyone else gets here, farts around and disappears most of the day, only to clock out when he gets back from the gym. Ugh. I can only roll my eyes and ignore the situation, because I'm done trying to fight that battle. I'm happy that we're finally starting to get a long, and I'd rather it stay that way for as long as I can stretch it.
I really want that car... My beloved Passat. I don't know what that will do to turn my life around, but sometimes things spark the most unexpected changes in people. I'm hoping that if I get this car, that it will inspire me to want to keep things in check, that I will be expected to make these payments and really get my credit score on the map. There are a lot of things that I WANT, not necessarily need... But sometimes you just need some sugar to make yourself sweeter. Positive reinforcement? The way my credit stands right now, I could probably get myself a good amount of things... But I am really serious about this car. *sigh*...It almost makes me sad. =(
An appointment has been made to get an estimate on the reupholstering of my backseat... In hopes that it'll make it more appealing and thusly, get more from the trade-in towards the Passat. I guess it's a way to get the ball rolling. Guess we'll just have to see what happens.
I want to get out of here soon. This bad weather is making me sleepy.