Style Tip #85
in my experience, the secret to fine dining is to introduce the unexpected. For example, if one dines in Vincenzo's with a group that doesn't know him very well, it will impress them if you break the monotony by punching a waiter, or the like. If you choose the example option, however, it is important to do so while the server is in midsentence, less he may fear he has offended you with whatever he last said. Naturally, it is much more chic to punch a member of whatever sex is opposite yours. Following this, explain that your penis itches, no matter what gender you happen to claim, and sprint as fast as you can to the nearest bathroom. Once inside, scrawl anti-communist graffiti on the mirror and then escape through the window. Finally, never call your dinner guests again. This will captivate the admiration of your aquaintances for years to come.