Gay Pride
I don't participate in gay pride events. I do appreciate their purpose, but the purpose only exists for members of the gay community. These parades, gatherings and parties are ultimately self-serving, and only serve to distance the gay community further from the rest of the population, make them seem more different, alien, and harder to understand and sympathize with.
Look objectively at a gay pride parade. You see tons of rainbow balloons and flags, painted ripped musculature posing on brightly-colored floats, gaudy vaudevillian costumes, pumping disco music, smiles and flaunting all around. You see every single stereotype of the gay community on display here, and most of them are bad. However, these stereotypes are torn apart, empowered and hurled toward the rest of the world in one great mass, in defiance and disregard.
I understand the emotions behind this display, but it involves no logic and no level-headed thinking. These events happen as a matter of pure emotion. It is a way to get back at the majority, who are seen as stifling, prejudiced and unrelenting in their rejection. The gay community spares no excess in throwing up the glittered and confetti-covered mirrorball middle finger to the world. So in turn, the world continues to spare nothing in continuing their application of the reverse.
Taking derogatory perceptions, accepting them, turning them around and using them in defiance is nothing new. Take as an example the use of the word "nigger" as it is commonly used in the American black community. "Nigger" used to be a slave word, and was used (and still is in some parts) as a measure of insult and disrespect. However, the black community took the word and made it their own. Now it tends to be just another way for one black person to refer to another, in much the same way as you might call someone a "buddy" or a "dude". This is only used between black people though, as when it is said by anyone but a black person, it carries a completely different connotation.
In much the same way, gay people call each other "fags", "queers" and "dykes" as fond terms of endearment. They have taken words of insult and made it their own. This can also be extended to any other quality that is generally perceived as "gay": Disco music (and more recently club music), diva vocalists, bright colors, neatly-dressed and manicured, stylish, artsy, flamboyant, loud, obnoxious and eccentric people. All of these qualities and more are exhibited at pride events in spectacular measure. The gay "niggers" are out marching in one big glitzy blinged-out campaign, and damn the world if they don't like it.
After the fun and glamour is over though, most of those people who had been trumpeting their uniqueness and individuality return to their day jobs, their closeted professional lives and their prime-time television. They put on their store uniforms, business casual wear and three-piece suits and go back to work. Maybe the people at work know about their sexual orientation and maybe they don't. But what is the use of fleeting pride? So the gay community is proud for one day, one week, one month out of the year. What about the rest?
Now, imagine a different strategy.
There are no pride parades, no affinity groups, no networking groups, no clubs, no political rights lobbyist organizations, and no specialized dating and hook-up websites. What would the world be like then? If the superficial differences are not emphasized, would the world take as much notice of them? And would there be as much backlash and push-back from the heterosexual majority on the matters of equal-rights and equal treatment under the law? After all, the gay community does receive quite a lot of press on pride day celebrations around the world. Are groups from the opposing side just trying to make as much noise? What would happen if the gay pride noise calmed? Would the noise from the opposing side calm as well?
Activists would argue that gay pride is necessary and that they need their one day or one month under the sun, because the rest of the time, it's all straight time. This is the same type of argument for specialized network television channels like Black Entertainment Television: There has to be a BET because all the other channels are WETs (White Entertainment Television). However, this is just another way of pointing out differences, and it only keeps cultures and people separate.
Another comparison can be drawn from history (and the continuing present): The civil-rights movement in the 1960's. The parallels between the political and cultural battles are evident. Then with the Black population, as now with the gay population, there are political platforms to be gained, biblical passages to be quoted, power to be gained, and superiority of the majority to be maintained. But the civil-rights movement is far from being resolved. Even though societies have laws which prohibit discrimination based on race, the discrimination continues nonetheless unchecked. In the same fashion, civil-rights and protection under the law for the gay population will only result in the change of the letter of the law. How the law is carried out is still very often a matter of interpretation.
One of the keystones of the Black civil-rights problem is also the solution here: Integration. This tends to contradict natural tendencies, mainly the ones developed from birth that bring comfort in familiarity and similarity. People like to be around other people who are of the same sex, the same race, have the same accent. They like to hang out with people in the same social circles, in the same gross income brackets and who drink the same brand of beer. If someone walks in the room of Coors-drinking blue collars getting their football game on carrying that martini with a twist, watch the conversation stop.
Integration is working against the natural grain. It has been more than 30 years since the civil-rights movement ended, but the ideals of integration are still unfulfilled. Neighborhoods tend to be mono-colored, mono-raced and monophonic. So, tolerance of differences is difficult, and requires a measure of determined willpower. It takes a lot of thought to see a person who is different from you and not engage the natural fight-or-flight response. This tendency can be overcome though, and it might be found that this action will serve to enrich everyone’s lives in ways they do not realize. But making superficial differences an unimportant matter is the first step toward that action. Continuing to stress these differences makes this more difficult.
I do still look forward to some day where sexual orientation is an issue of the past. But pride parades just point out differences and strengthen the resolve of the opposed. After all, the gay population is estimated to be only five percent of the total population. Spitting in the majority’s face with rainbows and Diana Ross seems unwise. Instead, the gay community needs to work towards making their differences an unimportant matter, and focus on the commonalities which will bring tolerance, understanding, and eventually, a misery which will be forgotten.
Look objectively at a gay pride parade. You see tons of rainbow balloons and flags, painted ripped musculature posing on brightly-colored floats, gaudy vaudevillian costumes, pumping disco music, smiles and flaunting all around. You see every single stereotype of the gay community on display here, and most of them are bad. However, these stereotypes are torn apart, empowered and hurled toward the rest of the world in one great mass, in defiance and disregard.
I understand the emotions behind this display, but it involves no logic and no level-headed thinking. These events happen as a matter of pure emotion. It is a way to get back at the majority, who are seen as stifling, prejudiced and unrelenting in their rejection. The gay community spares no excess in throwing up the glittered and confetti-covered mirrorball middle finger to the world. So in turn, the world continues to spare nothing in continuing their application of the reverse.
Taking derogatory perceptions, accepting them, turning them around and using them in defiance is nothing new. Take as an example the use of the word "nigger" as it is commonly used in the American black community. "Nigger" used to be a slave word, and was used (and still is in some parts) as a measure of insult and disrespect. However, the black community took the word and made it their own. Now it tends to be just another way for one black person to refer to another, in much the same way as you might call someone a "buddy" or a "dude". This is only used between black people though, as when it is said by anyone but a black person, it carries a completely different connotation.
In much the same way, gay people call each other "fags", "queers" and "dykes" as fond terms of endearment. They have taken words of insult and made it their own. This can also be extended to any other quality that is generally perceived as "gay": Disco music (and more recently club music), diva vocalists, bright colors, neatly-dressed and manicured, stylish, artsy, flamboyant, loud, obnoxious and eccentric people. All of these qualities and more are exhibited at pride events in spectacular measure. The gay "niggers" are out marching in one big glitzy blinged-out campaign, and damn the world if they don't like it.
After the fun and glamour is over though, most of those people who had been trumpeting their uniqueness and individuality return to their day jobs, their closeted professional lives and their prime-time television. They put on their store uniforms, business casual wear and three-piece suits and go back to work. Maybe the people at work know about their sexual orientation and maybe they don't. But what is the use of fleeting pride? So the gay community is proud for one day, one week, one month out of the year. What about the rest?
Now, imagine a different strategy.
There are no pride parades, no affinity groups, no networking groups, no clubs, no political rights lobbyist organizations, and no specialized dating and hook-up websites. What would the world be like then? If the superficial differences are not emphasized, would the world take as much notice of them? And would there be as much backlash and push-back from the heterosexual majority on the matters of equal-rights and equal treatment under the law? After all, the gay community does receive quite a lot of press on pride day celebrations around the world. Are groups from the opposing side just trying to make as much noise? What would happen if the gay pride noise calmed? Would the noise from the opposing side calm as well?
Activists would argue that gay pride is necessary and that they need their one day or one month under the sun, because the rest of the time, it's all straight time. This is the same type of argument for specialized network television channels like Black Entertainment Television: There has to be a BET because all the other channels are WETs (White Entertainment Television). However, this is just another way of pointing out differences, and it only keeps cultures and people separate.
Another comparison can be drawn from history (and the continuing present): The civil-rights movement in the 1960's. The parallels between the political and cultural battles are evident. Then with the Black population, as now with the gay population, there are political platforms to be gained, biblical passages to be quoted, power to be gained, and superiority of the majority to be maintained. But the civil-rights movement is far from being resolved. Even though societies have laws which prohibit discrimination based on race, the discrimination continues nonetheless unchecked. In the same fashion, civil-rights and protection under the law for the gay population will only result in the change of the letter of the law. How the law is carried out is still very often a matter of interpretation.
One of the keystones of the Black civil-rights problem is also the solution here: Integration. This tends to contradict natural tendencies, mainly the ones developed from birth that bring comfort in familiarity and similarity. People like to be around other people who are of the same sex, the same race, have the same accent. They like to hang out with people in the same social circles, in the same gross income brackets and who drink the same brand of beer. If someone walks in the room of Coors-drinking blue collars getting their football game on carrying that martini with a twist, watch the conversation stop.
Integration is working against the natural grain. It has been more than 30 years since the civil-rights movement ended, but the ideals of integration are still unfulfilled. Neighborhoods tend to be mono-colored, mono-raced and monophonic. So, tolerance of differences is difficult, and requires a measure of determined willpower. It takes a lot of thought to see a person who is different from you and not engage the natural fight-or-flight response. This tendency can be overcome though, and it might be found that this action will serve to enrich everyone’s lives in ways they do not realize. But making superficial differences an unimportant matter is the first step toward that action. Continuing to stress these differences makes this more difficult.
I do still look forward to some day where sexual orientation is an issue of the past. But pride parades just point out differences and strengthen the resolve of the opposed. After all, the gay population is estimated to be only five percent of the total population. Spitting in the majority’s face with rainbows and Diana Ross seems unwise. Instead, the gay community needs to work towards making their differences an unimportant matter, and focus on the commonalities which will bring tolerance, understanding, and eventually, a misery which will be forgotten.