Relationship & Cassandra..
I've been thinking about the whole Chris and Cassandra being friends thing, and I got REALLY upset last night. I don't even know how to begin to explain how it makes me feel. Whenever I get upset about it, Chris ignores it or throws a fit and Cassandra tells me she won't be available for a few days. I understand that it's not fair for me to tell Chris who he can be friends with, but I just want him to understand that I'm uncomfortable with it. I've talked to several people now, and they agree that your best friend and your boyfriend shouldn't be hanging out together without you. Why would they need to? They say they're friends now.. that's fine. But why do they need to be together WITHOUT ME? iuno. So I talk it out with both of them and let them know that I'm still uncomfortable with it but that I'll try to get over it. Well, I'm at work now.. and I felt completely over it until I got an email from Chelsea saying "Why do Chris and Cassandra like hanging out more without you?" How am I supposed to feel about that? It actually kind of hurt to think that my best friend has more fun with my boyfriend. I want things back to the way they were.. and until I can stop being so "controlling, self-centered, etc" I don't know what I'm going to do about how I'm feeling. My mom wants me to start taking Lithium Orotate because it can be used for stress, depression, bipolar moods, etc and I think it's actually a good idea. When I get off of work today I'm going to have my mom bring me them so I can take one. As for right now I'm sitting at work, being bored as all hell and thinking about how stressed out I get for no reason. Cassandra has asked me several times to try and get over things easier because if I let everything get to me then I'm going to be completely stressed out. And yes, this is true, but when you actually feel like something is bothering me, I get told to get over it and that it's fine I should just get used to it. That's not fair.. and I'm not going to DEAL WITH IT. Oye vey, I'm done cuz I'm bitching now instead of just writing. Maybe I'll write more later..