noticing
People are starting to ask questions, starting to feel uneasy around me, starting to notice.. People keep asking, "Shane, are you okay?" Cuz I never seem to be able to fake a smile anymore. Lovin' how this doesn't work. The light that used to ding inside my head just doesn't seem to want to turn on. Things I used to love just don't seem to be able to comfort me the way they used to.. I don't know what I want and I don't know how to feel. Fuck. I hate this feeling. I'm just sitting here, at my desk, in my room, staring at the screen and wishing I was asleep.. cuz at least when I'm asleep I don't have to hide from anyone but myself. Oye. I have school in the morning and I don't know how I'm going to regain consciousness at 6 fucking am. Why does school have to start so early? *bites lip* I'm wide awake and I really want to sleep.. I'm hoping that drinking this tea and writing this fucking entry will some how tire me.. Hrmph. Not working.. I guess I'll just go lay in bed.. and toss and turn. Fuck it. I'm out. ♥