reminising ....
Well yesterday i woke up and called heather because she was still at jays and then she came home and took a shower and amanda picked us up ... so we went to jays and then me heather amanda dean and john decided to go see kyle. So when we got there we talked for a little bit and then we all wanted taco bell ... so me john dean and heather went to taco bell and brought it back to the hospital ... then melissa walker came and i talked to her for a little bit but john was still hungry so me and him took amandas car to taco bell .. even though he doesnt have a license yet.. lol ... then we came back and left like 20 minutes later... so we went home and ate dinner with the family and my mom told us tom and giacomo called so heather called giac back and i went in my room .. so we called little jay and he said to come over .. so i got changed b.c it was cold out and heather drove my moms car ... so when we got there only him and ryan were there and my mom was a little pissed but she let me stay... it was fun we didnt fight or anything ... we were all talking about the stupid shit we remembered and i filled him in on how my whole fam hates him and we were just talking about my dad and stuff... then some kids in a black car through something at me and i rye and jay were going to go find them but i didnt let them b.c it was stupid ... then last night i was talking on the phone and tom called me so i talked to him for a little and then i clicked over and forgot about him... i dont really care right now b.c someone just called my house and told me all the shit he was talking about me ... i forgot how cool he was to talk about me like that.. anyway .. it was good to talk to ryan and get everything straight .. hes with krista now so they will do good and i'm happy that i dont have all this stress on me anymore .. i dont know what i am doing tonight .. i still have to get in the shower ... i tried calling tom this morning but he wouldnt answer.. jay and rye tried to get me to call him last night b.c they said he loves me but i didnt want to do it in front of them so i talked to him a little when i got home but it just feels worthless.. i really dont think he even cares b.c he just goes out and doesnt even make an effort with me .. all he knows how to do is call me and start another fight .... so yeah ... now look where we ended up... maybe i just dont know how to love anyone ..or maybe i just dont want to be hurt anymore ...
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