(no subject)
So I get off the phone with Mayor McDumbass, right. He's like "You guys stole blah blah of my shares!" and I'm all like "No sir. Diplomacy diplomacy"
So he starts yelling out numbers, right. Big numbers. I track down his shares, and he's like "I know those, where are the others!"
I ask him "Do you have a reinvestment statement?" For the uninitiated, you can choose to have your dividends from stock either come to you as a big fat check, or go back into the account to try and buy more shares. This chap was reinvesting, but stopped about nine months back. Shares can be held in three ways: On paper certificates, on our books, or in the reinvestment position.
His reply, "Yes, but that's not the point! Where are my four thousand shares!"
Guess where his 'missing' four thousand shares were? That's right, gentle reader.... in Reinvestment...
So I do this amazing thing, called Math, and magically four thousand shares just materialize out of mid-air. Mayor McDumbass, now completely confounded that 21st century math has once again defeated him, skulks back to the darkness whence he came.
God my job sucks sometimes...
So he starts yelling out numbers, right. Big numbers. I track down his shares, and he's like "I know those, where are the others!"
I ask him "Do you have a reinvestment statement?" For the uninitiated, you can choose to have your dividends from stock either come to you as a big fat check, or go back into the account to try and buy more shares. This chap was reinvesting, but stopped about nine months back. Shares can be held in three ways: On paper certificates, on our books, or in the reinvestment position.
His reply, "Yes, but that's not the point! Where are my four thousand shares!"
Guess where his 'missing' four thousand shares were? That's right, gentle reader.... in Reinvestment...
So I do this amazing thing, called Math, and magically four thousand shares just materialize out of mid-air. Mayor McDumbass, now completely confounded that 21st century math has once again defeated him, skulks back to the darkness whence he came.
God my job sucks sometimes...