o32 :: Hello again, it's you and me, kinda always like it used to be

[grab_my_bells]

[The writing is slow, like Bell is purposely pacing himself so that someone can see this as it is being written on the page.]

It appears as I write. See?

Comments

Sure ^^

[grab_my_bells]

[Someone hesitates about leaving his memoryless bf alone...so no, it's not really convenient, but.]

Yeah. I'll be there as soon as Fred is here.

[Quicklog]

[Bell was only slightly late. Even though he knew hanging around at the house was not necessarily going to make Gai remember or keep him any safer than leaving Gai alone would, Bell was still cautious and paranoid. He made sure Fred had arrived to visit before stepping out to see Huo. At least if something happened to Bell, Gai would have a known-friend to look after him.]

[He didn't frequent the scrapyard to the degree that others, like Gai, did, so Bell was somewhat unfamiliar with the set up. Mindful of his surroundings, he walked around the piles of various findings until he found Huo. Even to the untrained and inattentive eye, Bell looked somewhat burned out and his attempts to cover it with a casual air and flippant humor weren't terribly effective. It was probably dangerous, then, to be talking with and observed by a man as observant as Huo right now.]

Hey. It looks like we'll have to hold off on any push-in challenges or whatever for right now.

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

[Huo was equally uneasy, although for a different reason. He liked the yard, but not when he was alone, with Sniper's show of exploding golems well in mind; he wished that they could be back in his and Hawk's house, sipping good tea before a good fire. But the house, although it was his home, although he wanted no other dwelling place, was not as safe as this cold pile of scraps. And he needed safety. And wished that he did not.

He greeted Bell with a low bow. They'd done little but joke over the journals, but he had the sense that they both had at least an idea of each other's true measure. No play, now.]

I fear so. The obvious aside, is Gai-jūn well?

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

[Bell nodded solemnly, giving up on the teasing-pervert facade and settling in comfortably instead into the serious and withdrawn man he often really was.]

He's fine physically, at least as far as we've determined. Emotionally, he's confused, of course, but who wouldn't be. He's like any other newborn with a history here. [There was just the slightest of shrugs. That wasn't entirely true. Most people were prepared when someone died or vanished for the newborn-version to be memoryless. No one was prepared for a lunchtime memoryloss, so the surprise on the part of Bell and Rain (and then the journal conversations) probably didn't help Gai's feelings of guilt and confusion.]

Did you just bring me down here to inquire after his health?

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

That is good to hear. But no, I did not.

[It was entirely too easy to imagine how Bell must feel, and Huo almost felt bad for pressing, for the entire conversation that they were likely about to have. But that had not mattered when he spoke to Gai after the lanterns affair, and it did not matter now. He started on a slow walk, just in case, watching to see that Bell followed before speaking.]

Gui-Bell, how aware are you of your partner's activities in regard to the Sphere?

[It was a terribly generic and vague way to put it, but on the very slight chance that Bell was not aware... well, this was a bad way for him to find out.]

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

[Bell followed along, morbidly curious and dreading all at once what this was leading to. There were so many topics that could come up at this point, and few were things Bell was in the mood to deal with on the level they probably deserved. But he could put emotion aside for the sake of his mission.]

More than a little. He seems to be on a mission to befriend the entire place.

[Ah, of course. He should have guessed the Ghosts would come up from someone after all that was going on in the Sphere lately. Huo, however, was not a member of either the Night Owls nor the RedHeads, and Gai had already noted to Bell that he didn't trust the other man (Bell didn't trust him either, but Bell's list of 'trusted' was far smaller than Gai's, so that meant nothing). While he knew Huo had inquired before about the Sphere activities, Bell wasn't sure what to make of the inquiry's timing. He was jaded enough to consider it could be taking advantage of Gai's memoryloss.]

[He withdrew his hands from his pockets.]

What is your interest in his activities?

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

[Not a straight answer, then, but Huo had not truly expected one, so that the very fact of its evasiveness told him all that he needed to know. He could not know what Gai might have told Bell about him, for good or ill - knew that his position was very uncertain, if he even had one. It was a necessary evil that he should only have approached the two of them in times of crisis. But it also kept him sharp, and was an assurance of sorts - if he could gain their interest, if not their trust, under such pressure, then what he could gain was secured.]

It is the same interest as have all of us who live here against our will, [he answered, and it was a lie, but a very well-practiced one: smoothened out and spoken as easily as any truth.] I wonder how freely I may speak. Gai-jūn is set on protecting those he loves.

[So much preamble. But it too was a necessary evil. There was no quick and convenient way to do these things. He could only hope that Bell understood.]

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

[Gai may have been set on protecting those he loves, but he didn't love Bell anymore. Although the feeling had hints of Gai's memory suicide, Bell almost felt he had little to lose at this point. Huo could ask anything. Bell could answer without losing Gai.]

[Except he would lose Gai. He had memories now that Gai didn't, and Bell intended to selfishly hold onto those memories for as long as he was able. Unless Huo gave him a very good reason to risk that, he would politely have to decline to go out on a limb for a man he didn't know and didn't trust.]

Not everyone has as much interest as you do, though. But say anything you'd like. I reserve the right to not answer.

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

Of course. [Huo gave another slight bow to go with the honest answer. The terms were defined, and right to be defined: it was better than dodging around each other endlessly. He didn't truly seek an edge on Bell, nor to put him on shaky ground as he had done with Gai. He was almost here to have a sincere conversation. Almost.

He kept his hands tucked into his sleeves, held together. The tone he picked up was businesslike.] The presence or absence of memories is directly within the control of the Sphere, as is the presence or absence of a Wilderness to speak of. Now we have seen an anomaly in both within as many months. Similarly we have seen a great prevalence in cases of the cocooning dust. It is an interesting coincidence.

[There was one more thing, but that one was bordering on paranoia; he held back the last of his cards, waiting to see how his move was received.]

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

[The coincidences Huo noted were things Bell had been noticing too. In fact, when the bout of sand-cocoonings went around, Bell had been disturbed by the number of victims who were people he knew well or had recently had contact with. But then everyone was paranoid here and had even more of a reason to be so when memories were being stolen in broad daylight.]

It is. And the Tree sometimes advertises its changes in advance; we had warnings for the ants, and had the cocoons before the clones. That doesn't mean it is this time, though. [The Tree also liked to feed into their paranoia too.] And seeing the signs doesn't help if we don't know what they mean. Unless you think you do?

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

[Bell's words saw a nod of agreement from Huo - they had the same idea, it seemed, at least in the initial sense. That the incidents, disturbing as they were, were only the precursors of something greater and worse to come. This was good, he thought, as much as anything was good: common ground to work from. Working toward what exactly was a question they could leave for later.]

I fear that I do not - not yet. [He shook his head, then met Bell's single visible eye.] I require more information if I am to make an educated guess. I assume that your partner will have told you that I do not lack in wits. Yet sharp as it may be, a millstone must be provided grain to give flour. Please tell me - did you observe any repercussions to the affair of the lanterns?

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

I see. [Just the slightest of brow raises. Bell was growing increasingly more suspicious of the man with all his questions, but no theories he was willing to speak of. The timing, the questions, everything made Bell far too cautious.]

Gai's told me, yes, and I could guess you were based on what I've seen of you around. In which case, I think you know there's usually some sort of exchange made for grain to be provided. [If Bell was holding all the cards Huo wanted, he was going to see what Huo was offering up in return.]

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

[Huo frowned, but only briefly - after a moment, he nodded with a wry smile.] I know, and I concede the point. [It was a calculated gesture, but he did not truly resent Bell his suspicion. Proof, he needed some proof - of his sincerity, of his value. He could not expect others to come to him, and he could not expect to be trusted.]

Very well. Here is my theory: I believe that the Tree is, as the expression goes, 'yanking our chains'. It is reminding us who is in power by taking away such privileges as we have taken for granted. Perhaps it is even alarmed. [It was one of his theories, but the other was not yet for anyone's ears, not even Hawk's or Stellaris'. What he said next depended on Bell's response.]

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

And it hasn't been reminding us of such since the beginning? [Bell gave him a skeptical, humorless look.] What do you think the Tree has to be alarmed of, when it proves time and again that it can kill, disappear, or memory wipe anyone that gets too close to its secrets?

[Granted, there were several possible theories as to what the Tree could fear from them, but they were broad guesses and Bell liked things to be a little more certain and solidified in his head before he voiced them. He also didn't want to supply the other man with more answers than Bell could receive in return.]

For example, in answer to your question: I didn't personally see any repercussions to the lanterns. I was a little indisposed at the time.

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

That is precisely the question, [Huo answered at once, one finger raised to emphasize the answer. He was skirting close to a dangerous edge now, he knew, walking a thin line of secrets told and secrets hidden. There were things he would not say. But Bell was sharp, and demanding.

Perhaps he could take a further risk in what he said, perhaps, if he were careful, if he shaped it to a certain meaning. Bell was sharp and guarded and sensible. And he had something to lose. He had someone to lose.]

What if this is the repercussion? I know that Gai-jūn did not release the lanterns alone. Others have lost their memories as well. Have you drawn a comparison? [He treated it as a given thing that Bell knew who was involved in the affair of the lanterns. If Gai kept secrets from Bell - well, that too was a highly valuable piece of information.] If this is the Sphere's response to your partner's actions - this widespread memory loss - then it is an extreme one. One who is powerful and confident never responds to a mere show of defiance with such extreme measures. That is the sure sign of someone who is slipping.

[Quicklog]

[grab_my_bells]

Of course.

It could be, but the Tree has been swift in its dealings of punishment in the past, at least as far as I've seen. [Avoiding the discussion of any comparison drawn...Bell was not going to out the other members of the lantern team to Huo by confirming if any of the others were among those memory wiped now (so far, it seemed Huo only knew Gai, and Bell by extension--and who was part of it wasn't even openly discussed among the participants).] One who is desperate to regain and show a sense of power rarely has the patience to delay that gratification, and the lanterns were released some time ago.

[He kept to things shared on the journals.] During the time of the lanterns, I was replaced by a clone; sometime later, Gai was caught in one of the dust-cocoons. It seems to me the Tree has had ample time to punish us for any involvement it assumes we had in the planning or execution of the lantern affair long before this. What would it gain from letting the impact of that single event cool, and maybe even be forgotten, rather than acting in quick retribution and making an example of him?

[Quicklog]

[getsome_sleep]

It would gain nothing - as may be expected from an irrational action. [But he knew that Bell's point was the better one, and was not sure whether that calmed or worried him further. If the memory loss was not a punishment, if the Tree was not seeking to frighten them, then it meant that Gai's lanterns had not been any major concern to it; but it also gave strength to Huo's second theory. The unvoiced one. The one that made his gut clench.

Risk it, he thought: you must risk it. He has someone to lose and that makes two of you.]

What else can it be? [He continued quietly.] It cannot be that the very place is simply... becoming tired.