Fic: Stage Fright, Part 2 of 2

[lamardeuse]

Continued from Part One.



Sam leaned back in her chair. Now this was what she was talking about. She didn't know what Evan had done, but whatever he'd done had worked, and she wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. David had been transformed from stuttering wreck back into the guy she'd seen in that forty-five seconds of screen test, and he and Evan were striking sparks off one another again. The blocking rehearsal for the first couple of scenes went so well that she scheduled the filming for that afternoon, wanting to take advantage of this new development. The first couple of scenes were short, establishing Devon and Eric as characters and setting the stage for their relationship. At the end of scene two, Devon was to watch Eric getting blown by another guy. Later, the scene would be intercut with flashes of Devon blowing Eric, the intention being to make the audience wonder if the fantasy belonged to Devon or Eric - or both of them. Sam knew they weren't ready for that scene yet, but the voyeurism scene would be a piece of cake.

By the time everything was ready for the final take, Sam was pleased with what they'd been able to accomplish. “Okay, guys, let's try to get this in one,” she said. “David, please go to your mark; Evan and Terry, you know what to do.” Terry nodded, dropping obediently to his knees and going right for Evan's buttons.

She heard Evan chuckle low in his throat. “You don't waste any time, do you?” When she looked again, Terry already had Evan's cock out and was licking a stripe up the underside. Evan leaned his head back against the puddlejumper mockup and shut his eyes.

“Terry, honey, let Lindsey focus first, will you please?” Sam said sweetly. Around them, the crew chuckled, and Terry drew back, pouting.

“I'm ready,” Lindsey said after a minute, and before Sam could shout, “Action!” Terry had swallowed Evan down with practiced enthusiasm. It wasn't a big deal, since Evan could last as long as anyone, and David was supposed to walk in on them in the middle of it.

Lindsey's camera was trained on the corner where David would appear. At the snap of the clapper, David came out, turned, and stopped dead in his tracks, his gaze riveted to the sight in front of him. Sam watched as his expression cycled through surprise to shock, finally settling on a mixture of hurt and anger.

Wow, this guy was good.

Lindsey swung the camera back to Terry and Evan, who were definitely enjoying themselves. Terry loved sucking cock, and he was extremely good at it, able to deep-throat even the biggest of their stars. Evan was right up there in the top three, and Terry was taking him easily, bobbing up and down with enthusiasm. Evan still had his eyes closed and Sam noticed he wasn't touching Terry anywhere, his hands resting at his sides, just as she'd directed him to. She wanted to contrast the anonymous sex Major Adept was used to having with the sex he'd have with Doctor Perilla, and this scene would highlight that. For the “fantasy” sequence, there'd be eye contact and soft caresses, every touch between Eric and Devon proclaiming their desire, their connection.

For now, though, Devon Perilla was suffering, both aroused and upset by the scene before him. Lindsey swung the camera to get more of his reaction, then moved back to Evan.

“Okay, Evan,” Sam murmured, giving him the signal to open his eyes. When Evan did, she watched his gaze rise to David's, watched him react with surprise, then smile crookedly.

“I should charge admission,” Evan murmured.

Below him, Terry pulled off. “What?”

Evan didn't look down at him, holding David's gaze instead. “Nothing, kid.” Terry's lips closed around his cock again, and Evan, still watching David, began to fuck Terry's mouth. Every thrust of his hips seemed to be for Devon, seemed to be letting him know in no uncertain terms what he liked, what he wanted. Lindsey reversed the camera again, and this time David was shaking his head slowly, as though Devon refused to believe what Eric was trying to tell him.

This was even better than Sam could have imagined.

Finally, David turned away, seemingly devastated, and left the way he'd come. Lindsey turned the camera back, catching Evan's satisfied smirk as his eyes slid shut again and he thrust one final time into Terry's mouth.

Evan didn't know how it had happened, but it was nine o'clock on Thursday night and he was sitting in his apartment watching a rerun of Everybody Loves Raymond. Instead of going clubbing, he'd come straight home from work, cooked himself a frozen pizza and sat his ass down in front of the tube.

Maybe he was going nuts. Worse, maybe he was getting old.

This had nothing to do with the scene they'd shot today. It had nothing to do with the fact that Evan couldn't shake the image of David's face frozen in a mask of pain and anguish. Besides, the kid had just been acting. It didn't mean anything.

Only - was he really that good of an actor?

Evan shook his head angrily to clear it, then downed the last of his beer. He never had these problems before he came to work for GPFG. There was no frigging plot, no goddamned character development to make him restless and confused. Back then it was simple: tab A, slot B, everybody walked away happy. What was wrong with that?

Yawning, he picked up his plate and empty beer can, then carried them to the kitchen. He was just tired; it had been a long day, after all. Might as well get some sleep, and then he'd be fresh for the weekend -

A loud, insistent knock at his door interrupted his thoughts. Who the hell was that? Striding to the door, he peered through the peephole and felt his gut flip when he recognized the man on the other side.

David was already halfway through the door by the time Evan opened it, and Evan had about a second and a half to register that he looked kind of pissed off before David placed a hand in the middle of his chest and curled his fingers in the material of Evan's t-shirt.

Holy shit, thought Evan, going from totally limp to half-hard in the space of another second and a half. “Uh,” he said intelligently.

“I'd like to rehearse again,” David said, as though he hadn't just barreled into Evan's apartment and wasn't looming over Evan with his hand fisted in Evan's shirt. “If you have some time to spare.”

Evan nodded and tried to swallow around a dry throat. “S-sure. I, uh, I wasn't doin' much.”

David smiled then, and Jesus, Evan knew that smile, that was his goddamned smile; David had stolen it from him. It was cocky and feral and hungry, and Evan wanted it back right fucking now, but before he could summon the presence of mind to say so, David's hand let go of his shirt, trailed down his chest and reached for his belt.

“Oh,” Evan managed weakly, “that scene, huh?”

David's response was to tug at Evan's belt one-handed until the buckle loosened. Evan looked down, then looked up, and that was a mistake, because David was close, too close, and he must've taken Evan's upturned face as an invitation, because he sank a hand in Evan's hair and kissed him, hard. Evan did not whimper into David's mouth as David pushed his way inside, holding his head captive while his other hand pulled his zipper down and reached inside his jeans.

“Mmmmgggghhh,” Evan said, as David's hot, hot hand molded to his dick. David broke away, forehead pressed to Evan's as he panted. Evan went a little cross-eyed looking at him, but it was worth it, because David looked wrecked, lips swollen, farmboy tan replaced by a deep flush. Christ, he was gorgeous, and Evan found himself running his hands down the curve of David's back, finally settling on his hips. David started at that, his eyes snapping open; he drew back and stared at Evan like he was seeing him for the first time.

“Hey,” Evan said softly, voice strange to his own ears, “you, uh - ”

David silenced him with a hard, rough kiss, then grabbed the bottom of Evan's t-shirt and yanked it up, exposing his belly and chest. Stunned, Evan raised his arms obediently, then stared as David sank almost gracefully to his knees.

Okay. Evan did not have the slightest clue why this was so much hotter than the kid in the club the other night, but it was, it definitely was. David closed his eyes again as he leaned in and nuzzled Evan's cock through his half-unbuttoned jeans, and Evan shuddered when he saw the blissed-out look on his face, like David was getting turned on before they even did anything. Not that Evan wasn't hard as a rock by the time David got down to business and pulled his cock out of his pants; foreplay for him usually consisted of the words, “Wanna fuck?” but now he was seeing the merits of stretching things out a little. David didn't pull his pants down all the way, only opened his jeans enough to get inside and take out Evan's cock. Evan couldn't tear his eyes away as David leaned forward and took his first taste.

Evan heard a groan come from somewhere, but since David had his mouth full it was kind of obvious where it was coming from. He tried to close his eyes, but they kept popping open, because David with a cock in his mouth was incongruous and inexpressibly dirty. That it was Evan's cock made it about a thousand times better; he could not only see and hear it but feel David taking him, feel the strong curl of David's fingers around the base, feel the jolt to his nervous system when David hummed in pleasure, feel the soft rasp of David's tongue over the head and down the underside.

“David, Jesus, David,” Evan murmured, surprised he'd said it aloud, surprised he'd wanted to. David looked up at him with those blue, blue eyes, and shit, Evan had totally forgotten that he was supposed to be playing a part here, that they were rehearsing. Only this didn't feel like a rehearsal; this felt real, and Evan had just enough time for it to hit him that maybe this had always been real when David did something that should have been physically impossible with his tongue and Evan grunted and came without warning.

He would have been pissed at himself - his stamina was legendary in the business, he wasn't some horny teenager who went off after a couple of minutes of heavy petting in the back seat of dad's Buick - but he was too busy, what with the top of his head blowing off and all. He tried to look away, but David's gaze had him trapped. Watching David swallow around him and slowly pull off with a last wicked lick was the hottest thing he'd seen in a long time, and he did this for a living.

When a sufficient number of brain cells had reported in for duty, Evan bent down and reached for David's hand, then tugged him to his feet. He bit David's neck near the base and murmured, “So what can I do for you?”

He felt more than heard the soft sigh David made when it stirred the hair on the top of his head. “Thank you for the offer, but I'm - ah, fine.”

Evan pulled back, frowning. “What - ” he began, and then he clued in and looked down. Wow. “You - ” He looked up again, and saw David's cheeks were bright red. Jaw clenching, he took a step back, breaking Evan's hold on him.

“I'll see you in the morning,” David said shortly. “Thank you for the opportunity to rehearse.”

“David, wait - ” Evan began, but he had no idea what to say after that. He had more experience than any ten guys, and yet he had no experience with this. No really, I think it's hot that you came in your pants just from blowing me didn't sound right, and Don't go didn't sound like him.

“Good night,” David murmured, and then he was gone, and Evan was left standing there with his dick hanging out and his mouth half-open, feeling like possibly the biggest moron to have ever walked the earth.

Sam Carter was an experienced director of high-quality adult films. She was an artist and a professional, and she always conducted herself with the utmost decorum.

“Uh, Sam,” Kate whispered in her ear, “you think maybe you should call cut?”

Sam shook herself like a wet dog. “Cut!” she yelled.

On the set, Lindsey straightened from where she'd been squatting. “Oh, thank God,” she groaned. “My knees were starting to lock up.”

This was the point at which Sam usually offered praise to her actors and crew for a job well done. Unfortunately, all she could think of to say was Excuse me for a moment while I go change my panties, and that was not in keeping with the whole decorum and professionalism angle. “Uh,” she managed finally, clearing her throat before continuing, “gentlemen, that was...”

“Hotter than the hinges of hell?” Lindsey offered, grinning.

Sam nodded jerkily. “That works.” She looked over at David and Evan, who didn't seem to have heard her. They were still frozen in the positions in which they'd ended the scene, gazes locked. David's hands still gripped Evan's hips, and one of Evan's hands was cradling David's cheek. Evan's spent cock lay between them, and as Sam stared, David leaned forward and kissed it, then pressed his face into the hollow of Evan's hipbone. Evan's hand moved to David's hair, stroking it as David mouthed at his skin with a drunken hunger.

“David! Evan!” Sam said sharply, annoyed when her voice came out more as a squeak. “That's a wrap!”

Both men jerked at the sound of their names. David was the first to recover, dragging himself to his feet; Evan leaned back against the wall for a moment, banging the back of his head with a muffled thunk before pulling away and zipping himself up.

“Great work,” Sam said, more calmly this time. “Why don't you both take the rest of the day off?”

David nodded mutely; Evan muttered, “Sure, thanks,” and then they were gone.

Lindsey jerked her head in the direction they'd gone. “What do you suppose is happening there?”

“I don't know,” Sam said carefully, “but whatever it is, it's going to sell a million copies.”

This time, the door opened right away. David tried to speak, but his mouth was suddenly dry and his throat was tight and his palms itched because God, Evan was even more beautiful than he'd been five hours ago. There was no cockiness in his expression, no leering grin, only a man, eyes wide, gaze direct and unflinching.

“More rehearsal?” Evan asked, though it wasn't quite a question.

David nodded mutely. Slowly, Evan moved aside, inviting him in.

David walked in and turned, backing Evan up against the door and kissing him. Evan's hair was a little damp from a shower and his face was smooth and it suddenly occurred to David that he'd presumed too much. Breaking the kiss with great reluctance, David murmured, “I'm sorry, were you planning to go out?”

Evan frowned slightly. “No, I was planning to stay in.”

“Well, if you're expecting someone, I can certainly...” He gestured feebly toward the door.

Evan stared at him, a mixture of exasperation and wonder on his face. “You know, sometimes I think you might just be the dumbest smart guy I've ever met.”

Oh. Oh. David smiled cautiously. “I think it's the company I've been keeping lately,” he murmured, leaning in again and brushing his lips against Evan's. “I have a hard time thinking rationally when I'm near you.”

Evan's eyes closed to slits as his hands slid up David's chest. “You're crazy, you know that?”

David nuzzled Evan's smooth cheek - Evan had shaved for him, for him - then nipped at his ear. “Why?”

“Because guys don't say shit like that to - nnnggg, yeah - to other guys.”

“They don't?” David asked, kissing him again briefly. “What do they say? Would you rather I talk the way they do in porn films?”

“I - ”

David wedged a knee between Evan's legs and pressed their bodies together, then licked a stripe up Evan's jugular. “What would you like to hear?” he whispered. “Tell me, I'll say anything - ”

A rough hand sank into David's hair and tugged him up for a deep, scorching kiss. “Shut up,” Evan growled, his other hand closing around David's cock. “Just shut up.”

They went on like that for a week. Every night after work, David would show up at Evan's place and they'd spend a couple of hours 'rehearsing'. It didn't escape Evan that their relationship, if he could call it that, was heating up both on and off the screen as a result. David never asked anything else of him - he didn't ask Evan out to restaurants or to movies, and didn't seem to be pissed that Evan didn't ask him to do any of those things. Sure, after Evan had pinned David to the bed and fucked him last night, they'd ordered Chinese and eaten it in front of the second half of the Lakers game, but Evan just figured that was good manners. You didn't kick a guy out right after sex, especially not really good sex.

Okay, so he'd done that a couple of times in his life. Maybe a few. But that had been a long time ago. At least six months back.

“Evan? Are you with us, darling?”

“Hm? Yeah, sure,” Evan said, nodding at Sam. “Ready, willing and able.”

Lindsey chuckled. “Good man.”

“All right, let's give it a try, shall we? Places, please.” Evan sat in the chair in front of the desk that had been set up as part of Major Adept's quarters on Atlantis. He was making a show of reading something on his laptop screen when Sam yelled, “Roll 'em!”

Evan waited about twenty seconds, then looked up as if responding to the door chime whose sound would be added in editing. He turned and stood, then walked to the door. Offscreen, two stage hands pulled the sliding doors open to reveal David just as Evan waved his hand over the lighted wall panel that served as the Lantean door control.

“Oh, thank God,” Evan breathed, grabbing David by his tac vest and hauling him inside. “I was goin' nuts.”

“It was a perfectly - routine mission,” David managed, a little breathless. “Everything went well.”

“Don't give me that shit.” Evan's hand was fisted in David's vest now, keeping him close. “I got the preliminary report from Captain Snyder.”

David's eyes went round. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. What the hell did you think you were doing, wandering off without escort?”

“There was no danger - ”

“Goddammit, that's not your call to make,” Evan snapped. “I sent you with Snyder because he's experienced and he's got a good instinct for spotting danger. You could have - ”

“You were worried about me,” David said softly. He placed a tentative hand on Evan's shoulder. “Eric, I - ”

Evan shrugged off the hand and shoved David back roughly. “You could have jeopardized not only your own life but the lives of the men and women with you.”

David looked stricken for a moment, and Evan wished he wasn't so damned good at that. “Oh. You're right, of course. I'm sorry.”

Evan took a deep breath. “Yeah. I was right. And - ” he looked away “ - I was worried about you.”

“Eric,” David said simply, stepping forward into his arms and kissing him, open-mouthed and hungry. They wrapped their arms around one another, Evan practically climbing him in his effort to get closer, closer, closer. They'd talked about this in the rehearsal; this was a pivotal scene, one where their need for one another had to progress beyond the sexual to the next level. Not that they hadn't felt it before this, but for the first time they wouldn't be afraid to show it to one another. They'd kiss for a long while, slowly peeling one another out of their clothes, and then Devon would fuck Eric, pushing inside him, taking him gently and carefully until Eric was begging for it harder, faster, deeper -

Yeah. They hadn't rehearsed this, because Evan wasn't a bottom. Not off-camera, and not on-camera for the last ten years, since he'd been an inexperienced twink. He'd had one too many bad experiences with fly-by-night film companies and guys who hadn't known lube was your friend. Besides, it wasn't something he'd ever been able to get off on, so there hadn't been any point in pursuing it. There was nothing wrong, he told himself, with wanting to be in control, and nothing wrong with saying no to something that didn't work for you.

But this was a job, and for all the craziness, he liked working here, liked the way they took their time with projects and the way they gave a damn about their performers. It was a refreshing change from some of the places he'd worked over the years. So if they wanted him to do this, he could do it. It was just a job, after all, and he was going to be fine with this, especially since he'd fucked David bowlegged last night. He summoned an image to get him going; David with his arms flung wide, legs hiked high, mouth open and gasping out Evan's name. Christ, he was beautiful, and he was nothing like Devon; David was a bottom and he liked it, and Evan was perfectly happy to give it to him.

They stripped one another gradually, one piece at a time. Evan still marvelled at the GPFG way of doing things; every other job he'd done, the undressing had been pretty much over in about five seconds, because you showed a bit of skin, then they cut and you started up again buck naked. This was definitely more realistic, and a lot better for getting in the mood. For the first time since he'd started in this business, Evan found himself forgetting about the camera as they kissed and caressed each other.

When they were both finally naked, David pushed him onto the bed, and Evan only stiffened for an instant before going with it. No problem, he could do this.

Then David climbed on top of him and murmured in his ear, “I want to fuck you.”

Sweat broke out on Evan's brow, and not the good kind. He knew his next line, but he couldn't make his lips form the words.

Dimly, he could sense all the eyes on him, watching him, and his gut started to twist. Before he could descend into a full-blown panic attack, David pushed himself up on his elbows, taking some of his weight off Evan's body. Evan took that moment to suck in a deep lungful of air and mentally boot himself in the ass.

Then David's fingers stroked through his hair, touched his face, and Evan looked up into his eyes.

“It's all right,” David said softly, too softly for the mikes to pick up, “I could never hurt you. I love you.”

Evan stared up at him. That wasn't Devon's next line.

“Cut,” Sam said wearily. “Evan, you're supposed to be looking at David like you want him desperately, not like he's about to rape you.”

David shut his eyes briefly before shaking his head and shoving himself off and away. Evan said his name, but he was already halfway across the set, on his way to his dressing room.

“Don't start. Please,” David begged.

“Oh, David,” Katie sighed. “I wasn't going to say a word.” Crossing the room swiftly, she reached out to touch his shoulder. “I just came to see if there was anything you needed.”

“Only one thing,” David murmured, sitting down heavily on the dressing room's small couch. “And I'm finally beginning to wonder if I'm ever going to get it.”

Katie tried to smile. “It's not like you to give up.”

David closed his eyes. “He was afraid of me, Katie. Afraid of...” He trailed off, his cheeks turning pink.

“Afraid of being fucked,” Katie supplied helpfully.

“Katie!”

“Oh, for heaven's sake,” Katie huffed, “have you forgotten where I work? Have you forgotten my best friend happens to be a gay man?” she added, jabbing him in the arm with a finger.

“All right,” David said. “Just - let's not talk about it, please. It's too weird.”

“Fine. I'm not the one you should be talking it over with anyway.”

David shook his head. “I can't.”

“You have to,” Katie insisted. “And while you're at it, it's time you talked with him about some other things, too.”

David stared at her. “When did you get to be so bossy?”

Katie started, surprised. “I am being bossy, aren't I?” she asked, wonderingly. “Is this is what it's like to be a bitch? I've always wanted to try it.”

David couldn't help it; he burst out laughing. Leaning over, he kissed her on the forehead and squeezed her tightly in a one-armed hug. “Don't ever change,” he said.

“Haven't seen you around the clubs lately.”

Evan shut his eyes briefly. He didn't think he'd ever been less in the mood to talk to anyone, let alone an airhead like Terry. “That's because I haven't been around the clubs lately,” Evan said, trying not to grit his teeth.

Terry pursed his pretty lips. “Rumor has it you're spending every night with Clark Kent.”

“Don't call him that,” Evan snapped, darting a glance toward David's closed dressing room door. He was well aware that a few of the guys used that nickname behind David’s back, and it pissed Evan off.

“Oh, my.” Terry smirked, drawing back. “I guess that proves the rumor, then.”

“Yeah, and? So the fuck what if I've been spending time with the guy?”

“Well, sweetie, it's just that you're usually never with the same man twice. There's a little betting pool going - I've got three weeks, and the odds on that are astronomical, so if you wouldn't mind drawing it out a little longer, I'd be very grateful.”

“Who's got longer than three weeks?”

Terry stared at him for a moment. “Um. Well.”

Evan's gut clenched. “Nobody.” Christ. Knees suddenly going weak, he leaned against the wall for support. This is who you are, and everyone remembers it except you.

“You're really stuck on this guy,” Terry murmured, all teasing gone from his voice.

Evan's jaw clenched. “We're just fucking,” he said sharply, pushing himself away from the wall with an effort. “It's strictly for laughs. No big deal.”

Terry didn't answer, and when Evan looked up at him, he saw Terry staring at something off Evan's left shoulder. Evan turned slowly to find David standing in the middle of the hallway, his expression as stricken as Devon's had been.

God, that was you all along, Evan thought, right before David turned on his heel and walked away.

When the knock sounded at his door, David considered not answering it. It was probably Mr. Sanderson again with one of his petitions. The elderly man was always trying to get the other tenants to sign petitions for some cause or other, and David had seen him around earlier with a new one.

Finally, he sighed and walked to his door to open it; Mr. Sanderson rarely got very many signatures, and David felt obliged to help him as best he could. He pasted on a pleasant smile and swung the door wide -

And stood there frozen with an idiotic smile on his face as Evan Lorne stared back at him.

“Hey,” Evan said.

David forced his lips to move. “How did you know - ”

“Where you live?” Evan rocked on his heels and stuck his hands in his pockets like a guilty ten-year-old. “I might have snuck into Elizabeth's office and taken a look at your file.”

“Nice to know my personal details are on display for everyone's scrutiny,” David muttered, turning away. Behind him, he heard Evan enter and close the door behind him.

“Well, everybody at the studio knows how big your dick is...” Evan began, trailing off when David rounded on him.

“And that you and I are having a 'strictly for laughs' relationship,” he snapped.

“Yeah, I, uh,” Evan murmured, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Sorry you had to hear that.”

“Why? Because I wasn't supposed to know the truth?”

Evan looked up at him sharply. “I don't tell Terry the truth about anything.” He barked a short, harsh laugh. “Hell, I don't tell anybody the truth about anything. Not even myself.”

And just that easily, David found himself falling helplessly in love with Evan all over again. As if drawn by a magnet, he took a step forward. “You're not the only one who's been having a little trouble with the truth.”

Evan watched him warily, silent and unmoving, like an animal poised for flight. David took a deep breath, then plunged ahead. “I didn't come to Gay Porn for Girls because I needed the money.”

Evan's brow furrowed. “What? Then why did you come?”

David spread his hands. “For you.”

Evan blinked. “You - ”

“I didn't - ” David waved a hand vaguely to indicate his various physical charms. “It wasn't simply because I thought you were beautiful, though of course you are.”

Evan's look grew distant, shuttered. “So that's what this is about.” His lip curled. “Okay. This I get.”

David shook his head, confused, and Evan continued. “You saw a few of my movies.”

“One.”

Evan's eyebrows shot up. “Only one? I guess I still got the touch,” he drawled.

“I'm afraid I don't - ”

Evan surprised him then with a thin laugh. “You think you're the first groupie who tried to get into my pants? I have to admit, you get an A plus for effort, Doc. You certainly cooked up an elaborate scheme.”

David shook his head again, this time in an effort to clear it. He was a highly intelligent man, but his intelligence was focused on certain topics, and interpersonal relationships had never been one of them. His experience told him that Evan's behavior was irregular for him; he certainly by all accounts had never had any difficulty having meaningless affairs. And he had been the one proclaiming their relationship to be casual. But Evan was also clearly angered by the belief that David only wanted Evan for his considerable charms. David tried to make sense of it in his head, but he was too addled to think properly.

The only option open to him seemed to be full disclosure, even though he had been dreading this moment for weeks. But if he was going to drown, he might as well be pulled under the waves by the truth rather than dragged down by lies and misconceptions. “Friends of mine occasionally have - movie nights,” he began. “I don't usually go, not because I'm particularly prudish but because, to be quite honest, I find porn boring. Most of the men are so pumped up as to be plastic looking, and the sex is formulaic and unconvincing. No offense.” Evan only stared at him stonily; David gulped and continued on. “Well. A couple of months ago, I went to a movie night. I'm still not sure why - I was lonely, I suppose, and I hadn't seen a couple of my friends in a while. I thought I'd visit and catch up, and ignore the porn. And then I saw you.

“I can't remember the name of the movie, but you caught my attention right away, because there was nothing plastic about you. You were real, and you moved with such grace, and you smiled as though you knew something the rest of the world didn't. And then you - I can't remember what was going on in the scene exactly, but it was outdoors, beside a lake - you sat on a dock and looked out over the water, and - I couldn't breathe for a moment, because you looked as lonely as I've ever felt. And suddenly I knew that I would do anything to try to erase that look from your face.”

Evan shook his head. “You expect me to believe you did all of this - just up and decided to become a fucking porn star - because of something you thought you saw in my face for five seconds of film?”

David took a step forward before he was halted by Evan's warning glare. “It's the truth,” he said softly.

“You just said you were having trouble with the truth,” Evan snapped.

David risked another step. “Not concerning the way I feel about you. Just the minor details that might cause me to appear - ” he faltered “ - slightly insane.”

Evan snorted. “Yeah. Like telling me you love me.”

David lifted his chin, his gaze unflinching.

Evan's eyes widened. “Oh, you have got to be fucking kidding me.”

David took another step; he was close enough now to see the pulse leaping in Evan's throat. “No,” he murmured. “No, I don't think I've ever been more serious in my life.”

“Then you're more than slightly insane,” Evan growled, just as David took the final leap and cupped Evan's face in his hands. “Christ, David, you - ” His words were lost in David's kiss, which at first received no response, Evan's jaw clenched under his fingers, his lips stiff and unyielding. David's heart stuttered as he continued to caress him gently, as he tried to get his message across, all to no avail. And then, at the moment before he admitted defeat, he flashed on the memory of their first kiss.

Acting on an instinct he hadn't known he possessed, David wrapped one arm around the small of Evan's back, drawing him in tightly, while the other splayed across the back of Evan's head. Tilting his own head, he held Evan's motionless while he bit down on the tender skin of Evan's throat.

Evan jerked in his arms, and for a horrible moment David was certain he'd lost the gamble. And then Evan jerked again and groaned, and there were fingers in his hair tugging his head up for another kiss, and Evan's mouth was on his, mobile and ravenous and David whimpered and shoved Evan backward until he collided with the back of the couch.

“Bed,” Evan panted, and David practically dragged him across the room to the bedroom door. Evan's hands were already busy on his own clothes, attacking his shirt buttons; David batted them away, earning a hot look from Evan, who nevertheless dropped his hands to his sides. David propped him up against the door and kissed him again, tongue delving deeply as he finished unbuttoning Evan's shirt and pushed it off his shoulders.

Soon, Evan was naked and panting under David's hands, and it was easy to push Evan down gently but firmly onto the bed, where he lay staring up at David. Indulging in a little staring of his own, David spent long moments studying the powerful curves of Evan's body, the arch of his collarbone, the rise of his thigh muscles, the jut of his cock.

“Jesus Christ,” Evan hissed, “I swear, if you don't get down here right now, I'll - ”

Propelled into motion, David got naked as quickly as possible and tumbled on top of Evan, bracing himself above him, feeling his heat even from this distance.

“Closer,” Evan breathed, and David bent his elbows; “Closer,” and he brushed his chest against Evan's; one more “Closer,” and he canted his hips, bringing their cocks together. Cautiously, giving Evan time to say no, he watched Evan's face as he moved his hands to enclose Evan's wrists in a firm grip.

Evan's eyes slammed shut. “Fuck,” he whispered.

David ground his hips against Evan's. “Look at me.”

Evan's eyes opened, the pupils blown, and this time it was David who groaned. “Please believe me,” David murmured, pressing his face to Evan's neck.

“I do,” Evan breathed. “I still think you're crazy, though.”

David couldn't help it; he began to chuckle. “Okay. I can live with that.”

He felt a sharp nip at his earlobe, then Evan's hot breath against his ear. “So you gonna fuck me or what?”

David's response was to rise up, push Evan's wrists into the mattress and wedge his legs apart. “God, you're so fucking big,” Evan growled in his ear. “I never liked guys who were bigger than me.”

David smiled in what he knew had to be an idiotic fashion. “But you like me.”

Evan glared up at him, then smirked. “Yeah, I like you. Doofus.”

David leaned down, brushing their cheeks together. “And you know I'll never hurt you,” he whispered, and he could feel Evan nod soundlessly. Kissing his earlobe softly, David trailed his lips down Evan's neck, then mouthed along his collarbone before drifting down to a nipple. Evan shuddered and cursed as David suckled at one, then the other, holding Evan's straining hands down the whole time. By the time he worked his way down to Evan's cock, Evan was practically incoherent, his compact, muscular body sheened with sweat.

Finally releasing Evan's wrists, David sat up again and reached into his bedside drawer for the lube and condoms he kept there. Evan watched as David flipped the cap and squeezed a generous amount onto his fingers, then seemed to let out a breath he'd been holding.

“What's wrong?” David asked, frowning, but Evan only shook his head.

“It's fine, I'm good,” he murmured. “Just - slow, okay?”

David felt something inside him melt at the vulnerability in Evan's expression, and the gift he'd just placed in David's hands. Leaning down, he kissed Evan almost chastely. “As slow as you want,” he promised. “And we can stop anytime - ”

Evan widened his legs, a clear invitation to get the fuck on with it, already, and David sucked in a breath. God. Kissing him again, harder this time, he stroked one hand over Evan's chest while the other reached down and probed gently -

Evan made a sound when David found what he was looking for, and David wasn't entirely sure if it was a good sound, but he figured that Evan would tell him to stop if he needed to. Applying as little pressure as possible, he gradually breached Evan's body with the tip of one finger.

Evan blinked up at the ceiling and gasped, and David's resolve nearly left him. He looked like he was on the proctologist's examining table, for heaven's sake. “Evan, we don't have to - ”

“Keep going,” Evan gritted, and David obeyed, pushing in further, feeling the incredible tightness close around his finger. Had Evan ever bottomed in his life? It didn't seem likely, but now was not the time to be discussing sexual histories. The only thing that mattered was that Evan had told him he wanted this, and David was determined to give him what he wanted.

Slowly, he began sliding the finger in and out, applying more lube periodically, trying to get Evan accustomed to the feeling, trying to open him up gradually. When Evan began to soften, David took his cock in his mouth, coaxing him into a renewed arousal, but he knew it was in spite of the fingering rather than in any way because of it.

He was about to suggest calling it quits for the evening when Evan unexpectedly canted his hips and froze, his ass suspended just off the mattress. “Christ, what - oh, Jesus - ” he groaned, before driving himself down onto David's finger and rippling around him.

While David was still trying to absorb the fact that here was a gay man over thirty who had not fully experienced the joys of his prostate, Evan undulated under him, dislodging his cock from David's mouth. He gasped, “Gimme another one, I can take another one,” and David simply had no defense against that, none at all. Withdrawing his finger and fumbling for the slick, he managed to slop on another dollop of lube before introducing two fingers to Evan's body.

Evan took him more easily this time, almost eagerly, and now he was propped up on his elbows, looking down at what David was doing instead of lying passive and unresponsive. His gaze was avid, riveted to the rhythmic motion of David's arm. Experimentally, David twisted his fingers at the point of deepest penetration, and Evan jerked again as if shot, his thigh muscles twitching convulsively. David held himself still until Evan relaxed slightly, then drew back and did it again, and again, and again, until Evan was thrashing and panting under him.

“Need it - c'mon, c'mon - ” Evan grunted, pulling away and grabbing for a pillow while David ripped the condom package with shaking hands. As David prepared to roll the condom down his cock, Evan shoved the pillow up under his hips and hooked his legs around David's waist. David lost several seconds to contemplating the incredible sight of Evan offering himself, finally brought back to reality by the sound of his name. Evan was looking at him with a raised eyebrow and a smile that could be called fond.

“You want some help with that?” he asked, nodding at the condom still clutched in David's now-numb fingers.

“Perhaps that would be - ” Evan's smile was feral now as he sat up and took the condom from him “- the single most erotic thing I have ever seen,” he finished breathlessly, as he watched Evan pop the condom into his mouth and bend down over David's groin.

Evan rose with a smug grin, which David immediately felt compelled to kiss, hooking an arm around his neck and pulling him in tightly. Evan shuddered in his embrace, and something told David it was a good sort of shudder this time. Breaking the kiss, David pressed his cheek to Evan's and whispered, “I want to fuck you.”

“So c'mon and fuck me,” Evan growled. Pulling out of David's arms, he began to lie down again, but David had caught the brief flash of trepidation that Evan couldn't keep off his face.

“No, wait.” Evan paused and looked up at David, startled by the command. “I have an idea.” Urging Evan up again, he switched positions with him, moving to lie on his back on the bed. He then held out his hand palm up in an unmistakeable invitation.

David recognized the moment Evan understood, because his gaze turned white-hot before he took David's hand and straddled him. As he touched Evan, David was careful to keep his caresses as light as possible, allowing him the freedom to move as he pleased.

Evan reached over for the lube, then used it to liberally coat David's cock. Rising up on his knees, he paused for a moment, his thighs trembling under David's hands, before lowering himself slowly, taking David inside inch by inch.

David opened his mouth to ask if everything was all right, but the look on Evan's face stopped him. It wasn't pain, exactly, but it certainly wasn't comfortable. Tentatively, he brushed his fingertips over Evan's half-hard cock, receiving a gasp in return.

David's hand closed around him and he stroked experimentally. “All right?” he murmured.

Evan nodded jerkily. “Yeah, okay,” he breathed. “Keep doin' that, just like that.”

David was only too happy to comply, and Evan gradually settled until he was sitting on David's lap. For his part, David concentrated on breathing through his nose and controlling the overwhelming urge to flip Evan over and fuck him through the mattress. He'd never experienced such a possessive instinct; obviously, Evan brought it out in him, but Evan brought out a great deal in him he wasn't used to experiencing.

Evan blew out a long, slow breath, and then he was rising again; David felt the exquisite slide of Evan's body all around him and groaned. God, if he survived this, it would be a miracle.

“All right?” Evan asked, and David opened his eyes to see that sinful mouth curled at the corner.

“Only if you promise to keep doing that,” David answered.

Evan gazed down at him for a moment, then leaned forward slightly and began to impale himself again on David's cock.

“Promise,” he murmured, smile widening as he gripped David's wrists and pinned them to the mattress.

“Cut,” Sam whispered. Everyone heard her, because it was so quiet on set you could have heard an ant fart.

There were a few moments of almost reverent silence, and then Lindsey straightened from her crouch, rising on wobbly legs. “Excuse me,” she said, setting the camera down on the prop table and hooking a thumb in the direction of the exit. “I'll be in my bunk.”

“You said it,” Teyla agreed breathlessly, turning to follow her.

Sam shrugged at the rest of the crew, then said, “Take - uh, thirty.” To a woman, every one of them hustled off, leaving the two men still lying on the bed in a tangled, sweaty heap. Sam was the last to leave; she paused just inside the door, her hand on the master light switch.

“Evan? David? You boys need anything?”

There was a short pause, then Evan's voice drifted across the set. “Nah, we're good.”

“Great,” she said, and then, in her most professional voice, she added, “And, uh, thank you.”

“You're very welcome,” David called out. Sam shook her head, then hit the switch.

Make that two million copies.

When David emerged from his dressing room, he found Evan leaning against the corridor wall, his pose deceptively casual.

“Hey,” he said.

David resisted the urge to fiddle with his nonexistent tie. “Hey.”

Evan looked down at the floor for a moment, then looked up at him through his lashes, and David felt all the air leave his lungs. “So I figured if you're not busy tonight, you might want to - I don't know - go dancing or something later.”

“Dancing,” David parroted.

“Yeah. You dance, right?”

“Not very well, but I'd still like to go.” He paused. “Thank you.”

Evan smiled. “And before that we'll have to get something to eat. I know this great Italian place - you like Italian? I kind of got a craving for lasagna.”

David looked down to make sure he wasn't floating above the ground; he felt dizzy, lighter than air. “I love Italian.”

Evan's eyes twinkled. As David tried to find solid ground again, Evan shoved away from the wall and walked toward him, then cupped David's face in one hand and rasped as he leaned in, “Yeah. So do I.”

End