My Bachelor's Disease / I hear they make a pill for that, now...
My cooking is a bit legendary. I have injured myself and caused a microwave to explode by making chocolate milk syrup. I have considered attempting to make pancakes with a plate on a stove, lacking a steel or metal grilling pan substance, until told that such will expand the natural faults of the ceramic and make it explode at me. I have made cookies with red pepper. I have left the eggs out of brownies, thinking that if fewer eggs meant a fudgier mix, no eggs would mean an even thicker, fudgier brownie, which lead to a black brick in a pan. I have nuked popcorn in two different ways; one, leaving the microwave on a four minute setting and wandering off to gather chairs of guests only to return to find half of the bag black, and, the second time, here in Japan. I put the bag in the microwave, with the propper side down as instructed, turned on the timer, sat, watched without wandering, and waited. On the microwave is a switch, one with a picture of a cup with some steam coming out of it, the other with a picture of some water droplets over some meat. I have never messed with this, leaving it on the default setting for safety's sake, as I have no idea how general cooking utinsels work. I assume if it's on default, it's a microwave, and it can't be that hard.
....It's been a full minute, with no popping. Hmm. Curious. I suppose it's been a while since I've made some; maybe it doesn't pop until later, on some brands.
....Smoke from the bag. Holyshit. The popcorn bag is smoking. It's popcorn. Why isn't it just popping?! As I frantically push buttons, I turn the switch from the meat with water over to the steamy cup thingy, and it suddenly starts popping. The smoke isn't too thick, so I can still see inside. Awkwardly, I open the door, air out the smoke, and close the door again. The timer picks up, and it pops. However, when it stops and I try to take it out, the bottom portion is... melted. To the glass plate. I have some how melted black kernels, like plastic, to glass.
The rest of the popcorn was just fine, though, after scraping the bag out.
As I was also told that, no, I can't flip pancakes with just a spoon or a fork or something, I must use a spatula and, yes, it needs to be flipped, I broke down and purchased both at the 100 yen shop. Only, it wasn't really a pan, persay, so much as it was a stainless steel tin, but it had pictures of chicken on a rack on it, and cookies on the packaging, so, I figured it would work.
Turning on the stove with faith, Soldier A... ... found that his tin was sizzling, making scarry popping noises, and denting. I wasn't sure if this was standard fare for when using a tin instead of a pan, propper, so, I continued to watch, until the tin started to smoke, and a black circle formed. An ordinary man would be deterred by this, but I am no ordinary man. My presence in the kitchen forms a stronger form of stubborn, impulse-driven stupidity that is like ubermachinating my Y chromosome. The blackening of the pan clearly just meant that it was ready for the pancake mix.
I followed the instructions to the letter... which is to say, I had no measuring cup, but it said add 2/3rds cup water, and I filled /a/ cup with about much, using that same cup as the standard for the cup amount of mix. The instructions said to add more or less for thicker or thinner pancakes, so, I assume how much water isn't direly important. It also says mix with a wire whisk, which I assume a spoon substitutes just fine for. So, yeah, applie pie order, baby. Tashikashikarubeki.
Anyway, I pour the mix on, and... there is no abnormal degree of hissing or smoke! Huzzah! ...But then the mix runs. It won't circle out naturally or anything, and the ends are thinner, and only one side is becoming thicker and spongey.... I try, on the other portion of the pan, to lump it on with a spoon, instead, to no avail. Quickly, I try to flip the pancake, even though only have of it is solidified, merely because that one portion is blackening underneath. It breaks apart, with portions of the mix that spread out thinly baked into the tin, blackening in the center still. None the less, I did get a few chunks of fluffiness ripped off from various attempts with my mix amount. Those bits were quite delicious. The syrup I microwaved became warm and delicious without incident. I am still scraping bits of hardened baked dought off of the black tin, though.
Someone onec said that the water you boil spaghetti in has to be boiled, THEN have the spaghetti put in, then that water and noodle mixture boiled AGAIN to softness. Having just put cold water in a bowl with some noodles and microwaved it to softness, I assumed the call for butter or grease was equally as frivilous. Many's the time I've not buttered cookie, cake, or brownie pans, and I've noticed scant difference in the results! With cakes and brownies, I am very prone to simply mixing the ingredients right there in the cooking pan, after all!
....I've been told that a simple grease spray will, indeed, solve both the rounding problem, the moisture/thinning problem, and the sticking problem, when trying to flip them. I suppose it saves me from wasting precious mix....
....It's been a full minute, with no popping. Hmm. Curious. I suppose it's been a while since I've made some; maybe it doesn't pop until later, on some brands.
....Smoke from the bag. Holyshit. The popcorn bag is smoking. It's popcorn. Why isn't it just popping?! As I frantically push buttons, I turn the switch from the meat with water over to the steamy cup thingy, and it suddenly starts popping. The smoke isn't too thick, so I can still see inside. Awkwardly, I open the door, air out the smoke, and close the door again. The timer picks up, and it pops. However, when it stops and I try to take it out, the bottom portion is... melted. To the glass plate. I have some how melted black kernels, like plastic, to glass.
The rest of the popcorn was just fine, though, after scraping the bag out.
As I was also told that, no, I can't flip pancakes with just a spoon or a fork or something, I must use a spatula and, yes, it needs to be flipped, I broke down and purchased both at the 100 yen shop. Only, it wasn't really a pan, persay, so much as it was a stainless steel tin, but it had pictures of chicken on a rack on it, and cookies on the packaging, so, I figured it would work.
Turning on the stove with faith, Soldier A... ... found that his tin was sizzling, making scarry popping noises, and denting. I wasn't sure if this was standard fare for when using a tin instead of a pan, propper, so, I continued to watch, until the tin started to smoke, and a black circle formed. An ordinary man would be deterred by this, but I am no ordinary man. My presence in the kitchen forms a stronger form of stubborn, impulse-driven stupidity that is like ubermachinating my Y chromosome. The blackening of the pan clearly just meant that it was ready for the pancake mix.
I followed the instructions to the letter... which is to say, I had no measuring cup, but it said add 2/3rds cup water, and I filled /a/ cup with about much, using that same cup as the standard for the cup amount of mix. The instructions said to add more or less for thicker or thinner pancakes, so, I assume how much water isn't direly important. It also says mix with a wire whisk, which I assume a spoon substitutes just fine for. So, yeah, applie pie order, baby. Tashikashikarubeki.
Anyway, I pour the mix on, and... there is no abnormal degree of hissing or smoke! Huzzah! ...But then the mix runs. It won't circle out naturally or anything, and the ends are thinner, and only one side is becoming thicker and spongey.... I try, on the other portion of the pan, to lump it on with a spoon, instead, to no avail. Quickly, I try to flip the pancake, even though only have of it is solidified, merely because that one portion is blackening underneath. It breaks apart, with portions of the mix that spread out thinly baked into the tin, blackening in the center still. None the less, I did get a few chunks of fluffiness ripped off from various attempts with my mix amount. Those bits were quite delicious. The syrup I microwaved became warm and delicious without incident. I am still scraping bits of hardened baked dought off of the black tin, though.
Someone onec said that the water you boil spaghetti in has to be boiled, THEN have the spaghetti put in, then that water and noodle mixture boiled AGAIN to softness. Having just put cold water in a bowl with some noodles and microwaved it to softness, I assumed the call for butter or grease was equally as frivilous. Many's the time I've not buttered cookie, cake, or brownie pans, and I've noticed scant difference in the results! With cakes and brownies, I am very prone to simply mixing the ingredients right there in the cooking pan, after all!
....I've been told that a simple grease spray will, indeed, solve both the rounding problem, the moisture/thinning problem, and the sticking problem, when trying to flip them. I suppose it saves me from wasting precious mix....