your face is my drug, ke$h.
HOLY JAYZUS. This week, I nearly expired. Let me start from the very beginning.
I went home last weekend and had a lovely time with softball and delicious foods and Sam and Virginia and hgtv. Oh. Nick came too. Life was good. Now, I wasn't very excited to have to return to school when all was said and done because I felt like I was already home on vacation. I had to man up though and come back and plan to attack the shit out of the rest of the year. I wake up Sunday morning to come back feeling a little weird. Nothing too big, just a little weird in the head. SIGN 1.
I get back to campus around 4 and it's raining. I had to be at the boat house at 5 to race in the most unimportant event of the year against my own bad freshman teammates and our bad varsity 4 that I am no longer a part of. I get there, look at the line ups, and I'm like, cool, I'm stroking. Good thing I've only done that a solid once since Freshman year while the kid who's sitting behind me has been doing it all season. Maybe it's an honor. No big. So I get put in this 4 with the three lightest, weakest Freshman. Good. He tells us to row the entire race at a rate 34. Good. (That's not good). We race. We lose. Heaviest race I've ever rowed in in my entire life. I die. Bad idea Manny Delgado, novice coach. I start to dry heave over the side of the boat. SIGN 2.
Go to dinner. Can only consume a salad. (This is all I've eaten all day). Talk to Mary. She went to the hospital. I'm exhausted. I go to Anthony's. He's folding his laundry. I start getting the chills and taking his laundry and draping it over my body for warmth. Several layers later, we take my temperature. 100.2. SIGN 3
10 o'clock. I start falling asleep on the couch. Then I move to the bed. I wake up. It's 5:30 in the morning. I puke. More sleep. Afternoon fever check. 101.7. More sleep. I wake up at 3 in the afternoon and make my way back to my room. That's 17 hours of sleep. I chill out, eat some toast twice. Worst sleep ever. 2:30AM, vomit toast.
Tuesday. Nonstop liquid out the butt. Diarrhea. Diarrhea. More diarrhea. Vomit IN my bed in the afternoon. Temperature reaches 102.9. Eat some soup. Why would I do that? Wake up at 4:30AM, chug ginger ale. Can't sleep. 6:30AM, vomit ginger ale and soup.
Wednesday. 8AM. Health Center, please help me. They take my temperature. 104. They tell me I'm ill. They X-Ray my chest. I pee in a cup. They take my blood. They hook me up to an IV to pump fluids into my body because I'm so dehydrated. I lay in a hospital bed bored and burning. They give me a leukemia pill to make my nausea go away. Mary thinks I have leukemia for a moment. My bad. Another lady comes in and says, something happened with some cells, I need to take blood from your other arm. TV is in black and white and gets 3 channels. 8PM. They release me. I'm extremely viral and extremely bronchial. A bad combination.
Cough medicine lets me sleep through the night finally. I return to the doctor at 8AM per her request. Temperature only 100. She declares, "You're still very sick". She prescribes me some junk, a bucket and some sticks in case the diarrhea returns, and an inhaler? That will help my cough. She also forbids me from any class this week. I return to my room, sleep, and create the sweatiest bed ever. This is presumably from my fever breaking. I lay around all day drinking fluids and watching tv.
That is the story of how I nearly expired. Hopefully I'll be fully recovered by this weekend. I hear it's supposed to be pretty nice. More importantly, I hope I don't actually fail school this time around due to excessive absences, loss of bull-shitting time, and not being granted make-up work.
I hope everyone else is well.
I went home last weekend and had a lovely time with softball and delicious foods and Sam and Virginia and hgtv. Oh. Nick came too. Life was good. Now, I wasn't very excited to have to return to school when all was said and done because I felt like I was already home on vacation. I had to man up though and come back and plan to attack the shit out of the rest of the year. I wake up Sunday morning to come back feeling a little weird. Nothing too big, just a little weird in the head. SIGN 1.
I get back to campus around 4 and it's raining. I had to be at the boat house at 5 to race in the most unimportant event of the year against my own bad freshman teammates and our bad varsity 4 that I am no longer a part of. I get there, look at the line ups, and I'm like, cool, I'm stroking. Good thing I've only done that a solid once since Freshman year while the kid who's sitting behind me has been doing it all season. Maybe it's an honor. No big. So I get put in this 4 with the three lightest, weakest Freshman. Good. He tells us to row the entire race at a rate 34. Good. (That's not good). We race. We lose. Heaviest race I've ever rowed in in my entire life. I die. Bad idea Manny Delgado, novice coach. I start to dry heave over the side of the boat. SIGN 2.
Go to dinner. Can only consume a salad. (This is all I've eaten all day). Talk to Mary. She went to the hospital. I'm exhausted. I go to Anthony's. He's folding his laundry. I start getting the chills and taking his laundry and draping it over my body for warmth. Several layers later, we take my temperature. 100.2. SIGN 3
10 o'clock. I start falling asleep on the couch. Then I move to the bed. I wake up. It's 5:30 in the morning. I puke. More sleep. Afternoon fever check. 101.7. More sleep. I wake up at 3 in the afternoon and make my way back to my room. That's 17 hours of sleep. I chill out, eat some toast twice. Worst sleep ever. 2:30AM, vomit toast.
Tuesday. Nonstop liquid out the butt. Diarrhea. Diarrhea. More diarrhea. Vomit IN my bed in the afternoon. Temperature reaches 102.9. Eat some soup. Why would I do that? Wake up at 4:30AM, chug ginger ale. Can't sleep. 6:30AM, vomit ginger ale and soup.
Wednesday. 8AM. Health Center, please help me. They take my temperature. 104. They tell me I'm ill. They X-Ray my chest. I pee in a cup. They take my blood. They hook me up to an IV to pump fluids into my body because I'm so dehydrated. I lay in a hospital bed bored and burning. They give me a leukemia pill to make my nausea go away. Mary thinks I have leukemia for a moment. My bad. Another lady comes in and says, something happened with some cells, I need to take blood from your other arm. TV is in black and white and gets 3 channels. 8PM. They release me. I'm extremely viral and extremely bronchial. A bad combination.
Cough medicine lets me sleep through the night finally. I return to the doctor at 8AM per her request. Temperature only 100. She declares, "You're still very sick". She prescribes me some junk, a bucket and some sticks in case the diarrhea returns, and an inhaler? That will help my cough. She also forbids me from any class this week. I return to my room, sleep, and create the sweatiest bed ever. This is presumably from my fever breaking. I lay around all day drinking fluids and watching tv.
That is the story of how I nearly expired. Hopefully I'll be fully recovered by this weekend. I hear it's supposed to be pretty nice. More importantly, I hope I don't actually fail school this time around due to excessive absences, loss of bull-shitting time, and not being granted make-up work.
I hope everyone else is well.