i wonder... if everything could ever feel this real forever
I asked you if you liked me, you said no. i asked you if i was pretty, you said no. i asked you if i was in your heart you said no,i asked you if u would cry if i walked away, you said no. So i walked away..you grabbed my arm and said...i dont like you, i love you ...youre not pretty, youre beautiful..youre not in my heart, you are my heart...and i wouldnt cry if you walked away, i would die.....
i got this in some chain e-letter, saying if you send this to so many people your crush will kiss you. i dont believe in those things anymore, but i liked the story. i think its pretty. makes me wonder if anyone actually thinks that way about me, because i dont think ive ever felt quite that way about anyone, but i really dont know. i know i feel some of those things about my friends at least. but i dont know, im just really confused, im always really confused.
anyways in one of my past entries (the one where i bitched about my friends having boyfriends) i just recently got this comment going one about something, but thats not important. the important part was the end of the comment where the person wrote "Unless you believe that your going to live to 80 and be all alone. But i wont let that happen so dont worry". who is this person, & why wont they let me be alone when im 80? its trivial & it doesnt matter who it is, but i would like to know for peace of mind i suppose.
you know what really pisses me off? people who you are there for, but arent there for you. i know its kind of greedy to expect people to be there for you. i mean im not there for people because i want them to be there for me, im there for them because we are friends. as cliché as it is, thats what friends are for. but if thats what friends are for, why arent they there for me? i really do wish that the world was like nsssa, you can trust people there. but even still out of it, i dont feel like i can 100% trust those people, and actually its one of those people that isnt there for me when ive been there for them. honestly there are few people i trust completely, and even those people arent always the best of help. its just everything is stupid.
right so i saw Harry Potter & the Prisoner of Azkaban today!!! it was sooooooo much better than the other ones. but i was also happy because i got to see stan there too! the younger actors can actually act now. they mexican director really is much much better than christopher columbus. all the actors are getting hot, emma watson (hermione) isnt so annoying anymore. but it bothers me still to read books then have the moive have things missing or at different parts of the movie, that pisses me off. but it was better in this movie because it seemed more realistic the whole thing, i guess. i also had like a 4hr nap afterwards when i got home. then at like 10 i went downtown with reb & renee to go to tumbleweed, but they didnt like it much. but i got to see ryan! but not emma, i hear she was there though, & so was scott apparently (i didnt get to see him either, but i see him at school all the time so its alright). and all of the people i just mensioned in this paragraph minus renee & reb, were in the skillbuilding group with me.
to end things off, i hate it when people are rude fucking tools (& hypocrites, but thats another thing completely). & i believe i have aquired an incline to brown eyed boys, something i never believed would ever happen.
i will leave you all with a funny quote by reneé "who are the other two members of kiss? i know theres alice cooper & gene simmons..." and finally with another quote this one from heart "till now i always got by on my own, i never really cared until i met you"