I'm tired of junkmail...do I really look like I want to increase the size of my penis?
So at work, when we're bored, Andrew and Tiffany and I make McComix. I was going to scan them and put them up here, but that's not happening...whatever, so here you go.
Manager: We need you to stay late.
McEmployee: I can't. My mom died.
Manager (baring fangs and shooting firebolts at said employee): Die, fool!
McEmployee (running away): Oh, no!
Me and Tiffany (to Andrew): You are so HOTT! w00t!
Andrew (wearing shades b/c he's cool): Das wack!
Manager: Your raise is a dime.
McEmployee: You mean a dime an hour?
Manager (as McEmployee gets very worried look on face): No, just a dime.
Irate customer: I don't want no Big Mac!
McEmployee: But sir, it's all you ordered! You said "One Big Mac, please."
Customer: I meant Whopper! With curly fries!
McEmployee (launching said Mac at customer): Take the *@!* Big Mac!
9:28 am
Customer: Give me a fish samich.
McEmployee: It's breakfast.
9:28 pm
Customer: Give me a egg McMuffin.
McEmployee: It's lunch.
Customer: I'd like one ice cream cone, please.
McEmployee: I'm sorry, I broke our ice cream machine on purpose...just so I wouldn't have to serve you any!
Customer (pulling an Incredible Hulk with the big and the mad): No ice cream? No ice cream! You *!#% *!#@% You guys suck!
McEmployee: Have a nice day!
Customer: Gimme a chicken caesar salad!
McEmployee: Would you like that with grilled or crispy chicken?
Customer: Yeah, I want chicken! A chicken caesar salad!
McEmployee: Do you want grilled chicken or crispy chicken on your salad, sir?
Customer: Oh, yeah! Turkey!
McEmployee: Sir, we don't have turkey. We have chicken. Chi-cken.
Customer: But you just said --
McEmployee: Sir, why don't you try selling your extra stupidity by the side of the road? Have a great day!
That last one really happened to me in the drive-thru, too. I mean, obviously I didn't suggest they sell their extra stupidity, but whatever. Jeez-oh-man, but people are fucking dense.
Manager: We need you to stay late.
McEmployee: I can't. My mom died.
Manager (baring fangs and shooting firebolts at said employee): Die, fool!
McEmployee (running away): Oh, no!
Me and Tiffany (to Andrew): You are so HOTT! w00t!
Andrew (wearing shades b/c he's cool): Das wack!
Manager: Your raise is a dime.
McEmployee: You mean a dime an hour?
Manager (as McEmployee gets very worried look on face): No, just a dime.
Irate customer: I don't want no Big Mac!
McEmployee: But sir, it's all you ordered! You said "One Big Mac, please."
Customer: I meant Whopper! With curly fries!
McEmployee (launching said Mac at customer): Take the *@!* Big Mac!
9:28 am
Customer: Give me a fish samich.
McEmployee: It's breakfast.
9:28 pm
Customer: Give me a egg McMuffin.
McEmployee: It's lunch.
Customer: I'd like one ice cream cone, please.
McEmployee: I'm sorry, I broke our ice cream machine on purpose...just so I wouldn't have to serve you any!
Customer (pulling an Incredible Hulk with the big and the mad): No ice cream? No ice cream! You *!#% *!#@% You guys suck!
McEmployee: Have a nice day!
Customer: Gimme a chicken caesar salad!
McEmployee: Would you like that with grilled or crispy chicken?
Customer: Yeah, I want chicken! A chicken caesar salad!
McEmployee: Do you want grilled chicken or crispy chicken on your salad, sir?
Customer: Oh, yeah! Turkey!
McEmployee: Sir, we don't have turkey. We have chicken. Chi-cken.
Customer: But you just said --
McEmployee: Sir, why don't you try selling your extra stupidity by the side of the road? Have a great day!
That last one really happened to me in the drive-thru, too. I mean, obviously I didn't suggest they sell their extra stupidity, but whatever. Jeez-oh-man, but people are fucking dense.