IN AMERICA
What's the difference between Jean's America and his government's bonds?
The government bond eventually matures and makes money.
What do you call a guy who hangs out at the U.N. with all the countries?
America.
[22:12] Allison: What's the difference between America and a puppy?
[22:12] Auria: You don't feel bad for kicking America.
[22:12] Allison: The puppy eventually stops whining.
[22:12] Auria: Oh.
[22:12] Allison: Oh, good one
What is America's best contraceptive?
His personality.
Two people were walking down the street. One was America. The other didn't have any class either.
[22:16] Auria Tetsukai: America walked past a bar...
[22:16] Auria Tetsukai: ...HEY, it could happen!
[22:17] Jean: ..........OKAY THATS ENGLAND
How many Americas does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One: He puts it in and the world revolves around him.
Why do so many people take an instant dislike to America?
It saves time.
Why is America like a premature ejaculation?
Because even when you know he's coming, there's nothing you can do about it.
Why is America called "bratsche" in German?
It's the sound he makes when you sit on him.
Why can't you hear America on a digital recording?
Because recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated.
What's the difference between America and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off when you jump on a trampoline.
How is America like an H-Bomb?
By the time you hear him, it's too late to do anything.
WITH SOME BONUS CANADA JOKES
Why does Canada never go mountainclimbing?
Because if he gets lost, it's ages before anyone notices he's missing
Why shouldn't you drive a van off a cliff with America, England, and France all in?
You can at least fit in Canada there too.
The government bond eventually matures and makes money.
What do you call a guy who hangs out at the U.N. with all the countries?
America.
[22:12] Allison: What's the difference between America and a puppy?
[22:12] Auria: You don't feel bad for kicking America.
[22:12] Allison: The puppy eventually stops whining.
[22:12] Auria: Oh.
[22:12] Allison: Oh, good one
What is America's best contraceptive?
His personality.
Two people were walking down the street. One was America. The other didn't have any class either.
[22:16] Auria Tetsukai: America walked past a bar...
[22:16] Auria Tetsukai: ...HEY, it could happen!
[22:17] Jean: ..........OKAY THATS ENGLAND
How many Americas does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One: He puts it in and the world revolves around him.
Why do so many people take an instant dislike to America?
It saves time.
Why is America like a premature ejaculation?
Because even when you know he's coming, there's nothing you can do about it.
Why is America called "bratsche" in German?
It's the sound he makes when you sit on him.
Why can't you hear America on a digital recording?
Because recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated.
What's the difference between America and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off when you jump on a trampoline.
How is America like an H-Bomb?
By the time you hear him, it's too late to do anything.
WITH SOME BONUS CANADA JOKES
Why does Canada never go mountainclimbing?
Because if he gets lost, it's ages before anyone notices he's missing
Why shouldn't you drive a van off a cliff with America, England, and France all in?
You can at least fit in Canada there too.