(no subject)
I weighed today. I gained 4 pounds and it's horrible! I do not want to get fat again. Though I suppose that's my own fault for not working out that much this past week/weekend. Starting today I am going to start eating better and work out. I'm going to do this every damn day of this coming week. I will get up early in the mornings and go to the Gym to get my sweat on. I will do everything in my power to make sure I am soaking in sweat. I will not go easy on myself. This weight gain is a big wake up call. It's telling me not to be so damn lazy. When I don't want to work out I am going to force myself. I won't and I know I've said this already but I am going to say it again. I won't let myself get fat again. I can't afford that. I like being small, I never enjoyed being big. Never in my life have I. I've been big all my life and I was so close to being where I wanted to be. I can't let myself lose the will to want to be where I want to be in my goal. I need to see this through. I need to finish what I started. I still can't believe I gained back this much weight. I don't want to be this heavy. I would like to throw something and break something but I will not. I need to keep my temper under control. I was using Hydroxycut but it was making me angry and I didn't like it. It stresses me out and being stressed does not help the female body out at all. In fact stress causes you to gain weight, it doesn't help it lose weight. I won't let anything get in my way of losing all the weight I need to lose. Well not need to but want too. I will dedicate myself a hell of a lot better to the Gym this time around. I'm not just going to talk about it this millionth time. I'm actually going to do it. In fact I need to go soon because I am going to be doing a work out DVD here at home. The Gym I go to is not open on Sunday's. I'll do the whole DVD twice if I have to. Like I said before I want to be soaking in Sweat. I want to do something that is going to get my weight off my ugly, yucky body. I will not let the fat win! I will not let the Junk food win! I will not let the Cokes win! Oh and on that I will only be having cokes once a week. It's to serve as a treat for doing good with my eating habits during the week. Anyway that's all for now. I'll write more tomorrow.