The Covenant
Went to go see The Covenant with Wen and Alyssa today.
Okay. I've got to say... Whoever did the trailer for The Covenant is a genius, 'cause they took something incredibly shitty and made it interesting. Seriously, I have no words for how unbelievably bad this movie was.
The story hits borderline good about halfway through, and then the writers completely trashed it, and that makes it even worse, 'cause if they'd been a bit, you know, smarter, it might've been decent. I mean, the plot had no real resolution, there were about a zillion loose ends that remained to be tied up, and the sequence of events just didn't make any sense. We all agreed afterwards that it felt like half the movie had been cut out.
And the soundtrack sucked. I don't think I've ever said that about a movie. Ever. I mean, there are soundtracks that I don't rave about, but the music has never been so bad that I actively take notice of how bad it is.
Well... Okay. That's a bit unfair. The actual tracks aren't that bad. But they didn't work with the movie at all. There were all these nice, eerie pieces playing in the background for scenes that ended up being... utterly irrelevant. And it was completely saturated with high-energy rock that didn't really suit the mood of the movie. Although that may have been because the movie never really establishes a mood. Or a real plot. Or any of the characters. Or relationships. Or, uh, anything, really.
The only upside to having paid $6.50 and an hour and forty minutes of my life is that the entire cast is tremendously good-looking. They're not the best actors ever--the performances weren't terrible, but they were very stiff and forced--but damn, those boys got abs. And I definitely do not mind staring at close-ups of Steven Strait's face. Or Taylor Kitsch's. Or, you know, any of the guys, really...
There are also a couple of really good lines. Like "Harry Potter can kiss my ass!" Although Pogue is suspiciously Sirius-like, but I can't really complain about that in good conscience (What the fuck kind of name is "Pogue"? o.O). And then there's another scene where three of the guys are betting on what kind of underwear a girl's wearing, and Pogue says, "sorry, boys, but she hasn't worn panties since she was twelve."
Naturally, he's right.
But yeah. Overall, the entire story was underdeveloped. There was nothing to build on. At all. You don't really care for anyone beyond the fact that they're really pretty. The end was anticlimatic and rather stupid. A lot of weird stuff goes completely unexplained. Again, I wish this had been a mini-series. Because I think the whole story would be interesting, but they cop out on everything in the movie.
So really, only watch it if you're in the mood to stare at hot guys for an hour and forty minutes. 'Cause that's all you're going to get.
Okay. I've got to say... Whoever did the trailer for The Covenant is a genius, 'cause they took something incredibly shitty and made it interesting. Seriously, I have no words for how unbelievably bad this movie was.
The story hits borderline good about halfway through, and then the writers completely trashed it, and that makes it even worse, 'cause if they'd been a bit, you know, smarter, it might've been decent. I mean, the plot had no real resolution, there were about a zillion loose ends that remained to be tied up, and the sequence of events just didn't make any sense. We all agreed afterwards that it felt like half the movie had been cut out.
And the soundtrack sucked. I don't think I've ever said that about a movie. Ever. I mean, there are soundtracks that I don't rave about, but the music has never been so bad that I actively take notice of how bad it is.
Well... Okay. That's a bit unfair. The actual tracks aren't that bad. But they didn't work with the movie at all. There were all these nice, eerie pieces playing in the background for scenes that ended up being... utterly irrelevant. And it was completely saturated with high-energy rock that didn't really suit the mood of the movie. Although that may have been because the movie never really establishes a mood. Or a real plot. Or any of the characters. Or relationships. Or, uh, anything, really.
The only upside to having paid $6.50 and an hour and forty minutes of my life is that the entire cast is tremendously good-looking. They're not the best actors ever--the performances weren't terrible, but they were very stiff and forced--but damn, those boys got abs. And I definitely do not mind staring at close-ups of Steven Strait's face. Or Taylor Kitsch's. Or, you know, any of the guys, really...
There are also a couple of really good lines. Like "Harry Potter can kiss my ass!" Although Pogue is suspiciously Sirius-like, but I can't really complain about that in good conscience (What the fuck kind of name is "Pogue"? o.O). And then there's another scene where three of the guys are betting on what kind of underwear a girl's wearing, and Pogue says, "sorry, boys, but she hasn't worn panties since she was twelve."
Naturally, he's right.
But yeah. Overall, the entire story was underdeveloped. There was nothing to build on. At all. You don't really care for anyone beyond the fact that they're really pretty. The end was anticlimatic and rather stupid. A lot of weird stuff goes completely unexplained. Again, I wish this had been a mini-series. Because I think the whole story would be interesting, but they cop out on everything in the movie.
So really, only watch it if you're in the mood to stare at hot guys for an hour and forty minutes. 'Cause that's all you're going to get.