Naptime... and fear
Things had been getting better, though with only a few days between now and Halloween I can feel stress building up, and depression. Adding to that is the fact I haven't felt well in weeks, with random aches and pains, not being hungry when there is food and starved when there isn't it's been tough to keep everything working. Then today, I had slept a good 4 to 6 hours last night. Enough to keep going, but just shy of actually being what I need so when 6pm rolled around I decided to try a nap, after taking some Excedrin.
Alls well one would think but after an hour I woke up cold, scared and panicking. I had no idea where I was and all I felt was nausea. I rushed to the bathroom and sat on the floor for a few minutes to catch my breath. It was the most surreal moment in the last few days (and thats saying something when the last month hasn't felt very real to begin with). The worse thing is, my mom was out in the living room and ignored the entire episode. I guess she was busy reading and didn't think anything weird was happening, or maybe I just didn't make any noise.
I'm actually beginning to be afraid of sleeping, afraid that I might not wake up or if I do that I won't know where I am because my mind isn't catching up. This can't keep going on, I know this but when I try talking about it to my mom (or anyone really) they tell me it's stress and will go away once everything settles. This may be true, but until then I'm feeling like a rag doll.
Alls well one would think but after an hour I woke up cold, scared and panicking. I had no idea where I was and all I felt was nausea. I rushed to the bathroom and sat on the floor for a few minutes to catch my breath. It was the most surreal moment in the last few days (and thats saying something when the last month hasn't felt very real to begin with). The worse thing is, my mom was out in the living room and ignored the entire episode. I guess she was busy reading and didn't think anything weird was happening, or maybe I just didn't make any noise.
I'm actually beginning to be afraid of sleeping, afraid that I might not wake up or if I do that I won't know where I am because my mind isn't catching up. This can't keep going on, I know this but when I try talking about it to my mom (or anyone really) they tell me it's stress and will go away once everything settles. This may be true, but until then I'm feeling like a rag doll.