(no subject)
This could quite possibly win hands down for the worst week of my life. I really want to get away from here. Away from this schoool, away from the people here...just away. Everything is just starting to get really old. I am so over the whole drinking and partying scene. I went out last night and I was bored out of my mind. Also, I hate the way I am when I am drunk. I hate the way I am sober too but I guess thats another story. All my insecurities have come out to play this week. I went to this clothing store yesterday and I swear I looked fat and pregnant and ugly in EVERYTHING. Its so hard to be around thin pretty perfect sorority girls all the time. How do they LOOK like that? I mean really...how? I hate looking in the mirror and NEVER liking what I see. I hate my hair, my body, my clothes, my skin. What happened in my life to make me feel so ugly all the time or to make me be so critical of myself all the time? I am almost 21 and I feel less and less like a strong confident woman and more and more like a scared child reaching out for attention and love.
What I am I going to do?
What I am I going to do?