disclosure
what started off as a to do list the other day turned into
let go, let go, let go of the guilt/fear/anxiety
its called motivation
do it
so..
run hard
but don't forget to pay your speeding tickets.
do your research,
be with family,
be with friends.
appreciate it.
what is this ( ) anyway?
its all about motivation and will.
i've always had issues with motivation. so do a lot of people, i'm not any different than anyone else and i think i made a huge mistake years ago when i decided i was, it kept me running against the grain and although i'm a very hip, independent, honest and just plain awesome person, i lost out on a lot of relationships trying so hard to always do my own thing. so now i'm left with all of these fleeting friendships that perpetually end with we'll keep in touches and i'll see ya around soons. i wish i could say that i push people away and its my own fault but honestly i've only shoved a few. other than that i feel like i'm just a generic acquaintance to everyone.
anyway, they say emotional disclosure is one of the keys to adjustment and mental well-being. one thing that was/is certainly lacking throughout most of my life is emotional disclosure. don't get me wrong, i can bitch about stuff with the best of them, but the times when i really need to be honest about stuff i generally have a hard time finding someone i trust who's willing to listen. which brings me back to here. there's been some research to indicate that simply writing stuff down can help somewhat. of course i'd certainly appreciate the feedback from another's perspective or even just the idea that someone else might care. insert more self-pity here and now let's pretend to be over it.
but i'm not over it. i made myself into this person that can rationalize the world and disguise the majority of emotions. and where has this gotten me? well i guess i can't complain too much. i have a great life and there are still great people in it. but i'm missing things, some things i'll never have again, other things i pray everyday will return as soon as possible.
let go, let go, let go of the guilt/fear/anxiety
its called motivation
do it
so..
run hard
but don't forget to pay your speeding tickets.
do your research,
be with family,
be with friends.
appreciate it.
what is this ( ) anyway?
its all about motivation and will.
i've always had issues with motivation. so do a lot of people, i'm not any different than anyone else and i think i made a huge mistake years ago when i decided i was, it kept me running against the grain and although i'm a very hip, independent, honest and just plain awesome person, i lost out on a lot of relationships trying so hard to always do my own thing. so now i'm left with all of these fleeting friendships that perpetually end with we'll keep in touches and i'll see ya around soons. i wish i could say that i push people away and its my own fault but honestly i've only shoved a few. other than that i feel like i'm just a generic acquaintance to everyone.
anyway, they say emotional disclosure is one of the keys to adjustment and mental well-being. one thing that was/is certainly lacking throughout most of my life is emotional disclosure. don't get me wrong, i can bitch about stuff with the best of them, but the times when i really need to be honest about stuff i generally have a hard time finding someone i trust who's willing to listen. which brings me back to here. there's been some research to indicate that simply writing stuff down can help somewhat. of course i'd certainly appreciate the feedback from another's perspective or even just the idea that someone else might care. insert more self-pity here and now let's pretend to be over it.
but i'm not over it. i made myself into this person that can rationalize the world and disguise the majority of emotions. and where has this gotten me? well i guess i can't complain too much. i have a great life and there are still great people in it. but i'm missing things, some things i'll never have again, other things i pray everyday will return as soon as possible.