a sad sad summer
on my way to london in the morning. grandpas still in a coma but its only a matter of time before he goes. i just dont want to cry anymore. ive never really experienced this kind of tragedy on my own. my grandma died when i was like 6 but i didnt really understand it then. most of all im not ready to go on a plane for like 10 hours. what a drag. i wonder if he will just wake up. mom says that she thinks he hasnt died because hes waiting for her to come and tell him its okay to go. i hate to see her cry. at any rate, i said my goodbyes to my friends. sab- thanks for everything babe love you. and paul for just calling me out of the blue saying i want to be there for you. and marty for always being there thank you. met martys mom today.. scared so bad. but hopefully i didnt show it. saw vince on thursday. got into a big fight. he doesnt want anything to be over but i stayed silent. he hasnt called me since. it doesnt matter anyway. what really stinks is that while all this is going on - everyone is putting off my birthday. oh well.. i dont need one anyway.. its just another year. the best of my love....