Misery Loves Company
Whoever invented the word friend, I fucking hate you. I hate what you are, what you stand for, and what you're all about.
I am tired of being told "But I really would like to continue being your friend," or "I don't see you as boyfriend material, but you'd be a great friend," or "You're too young to consider something serious with, but as a friend you have great potential," I"don't think I could date a guy in college, but I could definitely be friends with him," or "I just don't see us being together, but there's a reason you're in my life, and that's to be a good friend with!", or my favorite "I don't really want to think of you as a boyfriend or someone I could be with, but rather as one of my closest friends." No, I don't want to embrace their offers, because if I did, I would be selling myself short and accepting the fact that I am seemingly undateable.
I am tired of giving 100% to something that I haven't gotten anything from. Not that my friends now aren't the best, but god damnit I want a fucking partner. Don't tell me I am too young, don't tell me that it will happen, and yes I am upset. Most people my age have indeed had a relationship that has lasted for more 3 months and have had a relationship since 2001, unlike me. I've tried being myself, not being myself, being talkative, being a good listener, sleeping together on the first date, abstaining until the moment felt right, making the first move, and not making the first move. If there is something I haven't done, please let me know. It's becoming painfully clear that maybe I was meant to be alone and bitter. or as a "friend" had the balls to put it, "Maybe God has meant for you to suffer the pain of being alone for a higher purpose." What type of "friend" is that? And what type of friend does and says that type of stuff?
Yeh, I am tired of it. I am fucking tired of being alone and bitter, even if that is what "God" wants. I am me, and I know that I don't want to be alone or continue playing the third of fifth wheel whenever I go out with freinds. Yeh, maybe "Misery Loves Company" should be the title of my autobiography.
I am tired of being told "But I really would like to continue being your friend," or "I don't see you as boyfriend material, but you'd be a great friend," or "You're too young to consider something serious with, but as a friend you have great potential," I"don't think I could date a guy in college, but I could definitely be friends with him," or "I just don't see us being together, but there's a reason you're in my life, and that's to be a good friend with!", or my favorite "I don't really want to think of you as a boyfriend or someone I could be with, but rather as one of my closest friends." No, I don't want to embrace their offers, because if I did, I would be selling myself short and accepting the fact that I am seemingly undateable.
I am tired of giving 100% to something that I haven't gotten anything from. Not that my friends now aren't the best, but god damnit I want a fucking partner. Don't tell me I am too young, don't tell me that it will happen, and yes I am upset. Most people my age have indeed had a relationship that has lasted for more 3 months and have had a relationship since 2001, unlike me. I've tried being myself, not being myself, being talkative, being a good listener, sleeping together on the first date, abstaining until the moment felt right, making the first move, and not making the first move. If there is something I haven't done, please let me know. It's becoming painfully clear that maybe I was meant to be alone and bitter. or as a "friend" had the balls to put it, "Maybe God has meant for you to suffer the pain of being alone for a higher purpose." What type of "friend" is that? And what type of friend does and says that type of stuff?
Yeh, I am tired of it. I am fucking tired of being alone and bitter, even if that is what "God" wants. I am me, and I know that I don't want to be alone or continue playing the third of fifth wheel whenever I go out with freinds. Yeh, maybe "Misery Loves Company" should be the title of my autobiography.