An Entry Without Purpose (?!)
For once, it'll be an entry without a planned purpose or whatever. Funky. (But, yes, this one doesn't have a planned purpose - that last one, though, didn't have such a disclaimer.)
So, as of right now, I'm sitting here with some sort of sprained ankle/bruised shin/tight calf/whatever injury encompasses all those symptoms. I cracked my shin against someone's knee yesterday and, well, needless to say, the pain has slowly moved down and now has decided that my ankle shouldn't be moving.
But, on a more pressing note, I suppose it's kind of hard to realize just how bad of shape my grandfather is in. He's been put into the ICU for the past couple days, and has been on sedation for a while (although they are now taking him off of it). Apparently, there are a lot of tubes going into different places and as of yet, he's still unconscious. Meanwhile, my mom and her mom are going around looking into churches and cemeteries. That's what sort of picked me up off my feet.
I just really don't feel the whole someone-in-my-family-is-dying thing. Like, I don't feel connected. And it's not like I haven't met my grandfather. It's just sort of wierd because it doesn't really seem like I care. And I know I should, so either something hasn't registered yet or something.
By the looks of things, my dad will be going back to Taiwan shortly. Which means I will literally be home alone - even Janice will be in Taiwan. (My cousins who are taking classes at IUPUI will be around, but they're not going to be like my aunt and decide that keeping an eye on me means sleeping at this house.) I'm not really sure how to take this, as if it's a test or what. I know that, by myself, I don't tend to get things done. So I'm maybe a little worried.
Also, I've been pondering what all it means to "have a life." And, based on one definition, do I want to have one? Am I some loser who spends all his time at home? (Not like I have a choice right now - my ankle will keep me from driving, so hopefully it's better by Monday.) Interestingly enough, Monday marks my 90 days. Scary. I'm wondering if I should offer my neighbor a ride (he's requested one for a long time now), but...
More later? Or probably not. But, yep.
By the way, I'm looking into doing something for lunch tomorrow. But no more bowling, I can't walk!
So, as of right now, I'm sitting here with some sort of sprained ankle/bruised shin/tight calf/whatever injury encompasses all those symptoms. I cracked my shin against someone's knee yesterday and, well, needless to say, the pain has slowly moved down and now has decided that my ankle shouldn't be moving.
But, on a more pressing note, I suppose it's kind of hard to realize just how bad of shape my grandfather is in. He's been put into the ICU for the past couple days, and has been on sedation for a while (although they are now taking him off of it). Apparently, there are a lot of tubes going into different places and as of yet, he's still unconscious. Meanwhile, my mom and her mom are going around looking into churches and cemeteries. That's what sort of picked me up off my feet.
I just really don't feel the whole someone-in-my-family-is-dying thing. Like, I don't feel connected. And it's not like I haven't met my grandfather. It's just sort of wierd because it doesn't really seem like I care. And I know I should, so either something hasn't registered yet or something.
By the looks of things, my dad will be going back to Taiwan shortly. Which means I will literally be home alone - even Janice will be in Taiwan. (My cousins who are taking classes at IUPUI will be around, but they're not going to be like my aunt and decide that keeping an eye on me means sleeping at this house.) I'm not really sure how to take this, as if it's a test or what. I know that, by myself, I don't tend to get things done. So I'm maybe a little worried.
Also, I've been pondering what all it means to "have a life." And, based on one definition, do I want to have one? Am I some loser who spends all his time at home? (Not like I have a choice right now - my ankle will keep me from driving, so hopefully it's better by Monday.) Interestingly enough, Monday marks my 90 days. Scary. I'm wondering if I should offer my neighbor a ride (he's requested one for a long time now), but...
More later? Or probably not. But, yep.
By the way, I'm looking into doing something for lunch tomorrow. But no more bowling, I can't walk!