NCIS FF: Say Goodbye, Kate (6/?)
DISCLAIMER: NCIS and it's characters belong to CBS and their creators. This is not for profit and I am recognizing no financial gain from this enterprise.
I think this is post 6 on this story... and since I am on dialup at home, I have no patience to go back and check.
A note... I forgot to thank Shannon, CLaude and Susan who betaed this story for me.... Thanks guys!
Here is the next part.. I need to plan the next part, I have the ending, which will be evil, but there is a Kate 3 story, so all will be well.
See part one for disclaimer etc for this
Now, on with the story! (cross posted to ncisfanfic)
<>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <><
The next morning was Brad’s funeral. When Kate opened her door, she was surprised to find Gibbs there.
"I told you I’d go with you, Kate," Gibbs stated softly at the surprise he saw in her eyes.
"I know you did," she sighed, "but I guess I didn’t completely believe you." She paused before continuing, "Thank you, Gibbs."
The service was beautiful, but Kate was careful to stay back and out of sight. She didn’t want to upset Andrea on this difficult day.
Kate waited until everyone was gone and after Brad’s coffin had been placed in his grave before she went to his graveside to pay her respects.
"I am sorry, Bradley. It shouldn’t have ended like this. I promise you that I’ll look after Andrea and find Manning- the guy who did this to you. He wants me to suffer as he did before he comes for me." Kate knelt and placed a single white rose on his grave. With eyes flashing her certainty, Kate stated, "I swear, if it is the last thing I ever do, I will kill him. That you can count on, Brad. It should have done before, but it will be done this time."
Gibbs stood back, allowing Kate to say goodbye, but he was close enough to hear her words to Bradley’s grave. They worried him. He needed to talk to Anton about them.
A week passed after the funeral with no further contact from Manning. As the week passed, the inactivity and lack of leads on Manning’s whereabouts were getting to Kate.
"You know this is part of his strategy to have you on edge and simply reacting. Three quick attacks, then back off, letting your worry and fear take over, eating away your confidence," Anton final spoke as Kate’s pacing reached the breaking point.
"I know, Anton! Jesus! I am not an FNG!" Kate snapped and then sighed. "I’m sorry. That was uncalled for."
"Katie-girl, when was the last time you were at the range?" MacLeod asked.
"About two weeks ago with the Sig. Years with the Glock," Kate answered.
MacLeod understood her code. She hadn’t practiced as a sniper in years. "You have it here?" he asked. Kate nodded. "Then let’s go. I want three hours a day from you from now until I tell you different," MacLeod ordered.
Kate nodded again. She had figured that order was coming.
Gibbs nodded at Kate’s request to head to the range.
Kate was a regular at the range- three to four hours every few weeks to keep up her marksmanship, but she hadn’t shot as a sniper since she had left Anton’s team. It was a part of her life that she had put in her past.
It took her a good hour and a half with the Glock to start to get back into the sniper mindset. The Glock had been her carry weapon, along with her .30 cal sniper rifle. She had been rated a distinguished expert with both when she had left Anton’s team. Once she left Anton’s team and joined the Secret Service, she had switched to the Sig and let her sniper training go. It was no longer a part of her life. But it was like riding a bike, although not quite as benign. One can never truly forget their training.
Two days later, Gibbs followed Kate and MacLeod to the range. He wanted to see with his own eyes Kate’s ability. He watched her practice and found it shocking to watch, and even more shocking to realize just how good she was. He wondered what had made her give it all up.
Kate knew Gibbs had followed them and was watching. She found it interesting how everything she had once neglected and tried to forget came back so easily. All her other training was returning as her sniper training did. It scared her how easy it was to return to the person she had once been after trying for over four years to forget. It surfaced every once in a while on a case, but now it was back with a vengeance.
She was in the middle of taking aim when she felt the second set of eyes on her. In a split second her Glock was safetied and at her side as she scanned her surroundings.
"Manning is here, watching me!" she told MacLeod. "I can feel him."
He knew she would sense him and disappeared as quickly as he had come. He left only a note.
You practice, but you are rusty. Soon we shall see who is better.
You will watch him die and then you will join them all in hell.
"I will send you there first," she vowed.
Back at NCIS Headquarters, she gathered her old team and her new one.
"You go no where without a vest on. I mean nowhere, not even to the bathroom!" Kate ordered, meeting each pair of eyes around the table.
A day later, Gibbs cornered Kate. "I think it is time we had a talk," he told her.
Kate sighed. She had known this was coming. She wondered what she would tell him. Suddenly she was tired of it all- all the weighing, what should I tell to whom? She wished she could just purge everything.
"Not here, Gibbs. I need to get out of here," Kate stated, the weariness evident in her voice.
He drove them to his place and headed down to his boat. Kate followed almost sluggishly.
Gibbs watched her curl her legs under her on his couch. He wanted to scream and yell, demanding she give him answers. Instead, he waited silently, and began working on his boat.
She was silent a long time- trying to figure out what exactly to tell him, how to explain what she once had been. She didn’t know where to start, so she started with the loudest thought in her head.
"I left Anton’s team and the Organization because of Manning. The whole last case with him was hell. He should have died then. I should have taken him out then. Bradley and Malcolm would still be alive today it I had," Kate stated softly, thirty minutes after she had settled herself on Gibbs’ couch. "But I stopped being a sniper because it was killing me. Every time I took a life, a small piece of my soul died and by the second time with Manning, I knew I was crossing the line. As a sniper, you don’t love your job- you are good at it. When you cross that line and begin to love it, you no longer function as a human being- you are a killing machine. At least that is the way it is with me- the way I see it. I couldn’t separate it, compartmentalize it. I just knew that if I took another sniper mission, who I was inside, my soul, would die. I’d lose myself and not be able to get myself back- you can’t get what has died back. Maybe Crack saw that and that is a part of why he ordered me to bring Manning in alive. I don’t know. I just know that who I was back then as a sniper is no longer who I am. But I can’t rebottle what I’ve let out again, either. I can’t deny what I was trained, what I know, what I learned as Katie-girl- it is all a part of me. Maybe after Manning is dead, I can balance it all to find who I am supposed to be. I’m no longer a sniper, but I can no longer deny I once was. There has to be some middle ground."
"You’ll find it, Katie," Gibbs told her, confident and unwavering in his belief of her abilities.
Kate looked over at him, meeting his eyes, and read the certainty of his belief in her that she had heard in his voice there in his blue eyes. Maybe she would after all. Gibbs was never wrong. In that spilt moment of thought, she decided to tell him as much as she could.
"I was on the rifle team in college. A scary concept for most to understand and comprehend- a woman majoring in pre-law on the rifle team. No one in either group I was with, the rifle team or my pre-law classmates, understood. It was fun to scare the guys, though." Kate smiled at a fleeting memory. "I was good- not the best, but consistent in my scoring. I attracted attention. After graduation, I was approached, but I wanted law school and had already accepted. After my first year, I contacted the man. Law school felt like hell on earth. So I trained hard for over a year and then joined a team from this super-secret organization. It worked beyond agency lines. It didn’t sit well with a lot of higher-ups that I was female, but what could they do? It wasn’t like they had a ready replacement. Anyway, I worked well, had confirmed kills, took out the bad guys. Manning came through my radar once and then twice. I left after the second time and was snapped up by the Secret Service. They didn’t know my past, but enough people spoke highly of me and I was good at what I did." Kate explained her past in the vague terms she was able to.
Gibbs remained silent- his gut was telling him that there was more she needed to purge.
"I didn’t like who I was becoming with Crack and the team, but I didn’t like who I was with the Secret Service either. There I was too soft. Maybe after this I can find a me I like." Kate sighed. "I swear to God, Allah, Buddha, or whoever you believe in that I will end this. Manning will die this time, if it is the last thing I ever do on this Earth. I can’t take any more friends dying for the simple reason that I know them. Anton is worried about how much Manning has changed me and I know you’re worried about me too. There was a time that a direct order was sacred to me. Now, with Manning, I’d kill him even if I received a direct order not to. Anton is more afraid of that change in me than anything else. I don’t really have the words to reassure him other than that only applies in Manning’s case. He has killed far too many innocents to live to be able to kill more. Some people are just born evil, and he is definitely one of those people."
I think this is post 6 on this story... and since I am on dialup at home, I have no patience to go back and check.
A note... I forgot to thank Shannon, CLaude and Susan who betaed this story for me.... Thanks guys!
Here is the next part.. I need to plan the next part, I have the ending, which will be evil, but there is a Kate 3 story, so all will be well.
See part one for disclaimer etc for this
Now, on with the story! (cross posted to ncisfanfic)
<>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <>< <><
The next morning was Brad’s funeral. When Kate opened her door, she was surprised to find Gibbs there.
"I told you I’d go with you, Kate," Gibbs stated softly at the surprise he saw in her eyes.
"I know you did," she sighed, "but I guess I didn’t completely believe you." She paused before continuing, "Thank you, Gibbs."
The service was beautiful, but Kate was careful to stay back and out of sight. She didn’t want to upset Andrea on this difficult day.
Kate waited until everyone was gone and after Brad’s coffin had been placed in his grave before she went to his graveside to pay her respects.
"I am sorry, Bradley. It shouldn’t have ended like this. I promise you that I’ll look after Andrea and find Manning- the guy who did this to you. He wants me to suffer as he did before he comes for me." Kate knelt and placed a single white rose on his grave. With eyes flashing her certainty, Kate stated, "I swear, if it is the last thing I ever do, I will kill him. That you can count on, Brad. It should have done before, but it will be done this time."
Gibbs stood back, allowing Kate to say goodbye, but he was close enough to hear her words to Bradley’s grave. They worried him. He needed to talk to Anton about them.
A week passed after the funeral with no further contact from Manning. As the week passed, the inactivity and lack of leads on Manning’s whereabouts were getting to Kate.
"You know this is part of his strategy to have you on edge and simply reacting. Three quick attacks, then back off, letting your worry and fear take over, eating away your confidence," Anton final spoke as Kate’s pacing reached the breaking point.
"I know, Anton! Jesus! I am not an FNG!" Kate snapped and then sighed. "I’m sorry. That was uncalled for."
"Katie-girl, when was the last time you were at the range?" MacLeod asked.
"About two weeks ago with the Sig. Years with the Glock," Kate answered.
MacLeod understood her code. She hadn’t practiced as a sniper in years. "You have it here?" he asked. Kate nodded. "Then let’s go. I want three hours a day from you from now until I tell you different," MacLeod ordered.
Kate nodded again. She had figured that order was coming.
Gibbs nodded at Kate’s request to head to the range.
Kate was a regular at the range- three to four hours every few weeks to keep up her marksmanship, but she hadn’t shot as a sniper since she had left Anton’s team. It was a part of her life that she had put in her past.
It took her a good hour and a half with the Glock to start to get back into the sniper mindset. The Glock had been her carry weapon, along with her .30 cal sniper rifle. She had been rated a distinguished expert with both when she had left Anton’s team. Once she left Anton’s team and joined the Secret Service, she had switched to the Sig and let her sniper training go. It was no longer a part of her life. But it was like riding a bike, although not quite as benign. One can never truly forget their training.
Two days later, Gibbs followed Kate and MacLeod to the range. He wanted to see with his own eyes Kate’s ability. He watched her practice and found it shocking to watch, and even more shocking to realize just how good she was. He wondered what had made her give it all up.
Kate knew Gibbs had followed them and was watching. She found it interesting how everything she had once neglected and tried to forget came back so easily. All her other training was returning as her sniper training did. It scared her how easy it was to return to the person she had once been after trying for over four years to forget. It surfaced every once in a while on a case, but now it was back with a vengeance.
She was in the middle of taking aim when she felt the second set of eyes on her. In a split second her Glock was safetied and at her side as she scanned her surroundings.
"Manning is here, watching me!" she told MacLeod. "I can feel him."
He knew she would sense him and disappeared as quickly as he had come. He left only a note.
You practice, but you are rusty. Soon we shall see who is better.
You will watch him die and then you will join them all in hell.
"I will send you there first," she vowed.
Back at NCIS Headquarters, she gathered her old team and her new one.
"You go no where without a vest on. I mean nowhere, not even to the bathroom!" Kate ordered, meeting each pair of eyes around the table.
A day later, Gibbs cornered Kate. "I think it is time we had a talk," he told her.
Kate sighed. She had known this was coming. She wondered what she would tell him. Suddenly she was tired of it all- all the weighing, what should I tell to whom? She wished she could just purge everything.
"Not here, Gibbs. I need to get out of here," Kate stated, the weariness evident in her voice.
He drove them to his place and headed down to his boat. Kate followed almost sluggishly.
Gibbs watched her curl her legs under her on his couch. He wanted to scream and yell, demanding she give him answers. Instead, he waited silently, and began working on his boat.
She was silent a long time- trying to figure out what exactly to tell him, how to explain what she once had been. She didn’t know where to start, so she started with the loudest thought in her head.
"I left Anton’s team and the Organization because of Manning. The whole last case with him was hell. He should have died then. I should have taken him out then. Bradley and Malcolm would still be alive today it I had," Kate stated softly, thirty minutes after she had settled herself on Gibbs’ couch. "But I stopped being a sniper because it was killing me. Every time I took a life, a small piece of my soul died and by the second time with Manning, I knew I was crossing the line. As a sniper, you don’t love your job- you are good at it. When you cross that line and begin to love it, you no longer function as a human being- you are a killing machine. At least that is the way it is with me- the way I see it. I couldn’t separate it, compartmentalize it. I just knew that if I took another sniper mission, who I was inside, my soul, would die. I’d lose myself and not be able to get myself back- you can’t get what has died back. Maybe Crack saw that and that is a part of why he ordered me to bring Manning in alive. I don’t know. I just know that who I was back then as a sniper is no longer who I am. But I can’t rebottle what I’ve let out again, either. I can’t deny what I was trained, what I know, what I learned as Katie-girl- it is all a part of me. Maybe after Manning is dead, I can balance it all to find who I am supposed to be. I’m no longer a sniper, but I can no longer deny I once was. There has to be some middle ground."
"You’ll find it, Katie," Gibbs told her, confident and unwavering in his belief of her abilities.
Kate looked over at him, meeting his eyes, and read the certainty of his belief in her that she had heard in his voice there in his blue eyes. Maybe she would after all. Gibbs was never wrong. In that spilt moment of thought, she decided to tell him as much as she could.
"I was on the rifle team in college. A scary concept for most to understand and comprehend- a woman majoring in pre-law on the rifle team. No one in either group I was with, the rifle team or my pre-law classmates, understood. It was fun to scare the guys, though." Kate smiled at a fleeting memory. "I was good- not the best, but consistent in my scoring. I attracted attention. After graduation, I was approached, but I wanted law school and had already accepted. After my first year, I contacted the man. Law school felt like hell on earth. So I trained hard for over a year and then joined a team from this super-secret organization. It worked beyond agency lines. It didn’t sit well with a lot of higher-ups that I was female, but what could they do? It wasn’t like they had a ready replacement. Anyway, I worked well, had confirmed kills, took out the bad guys. Manning came through my radar once and then twice. I left after the second time and was snapped up by the Secret Service. They didn’t know my past, but enough people spoke highly of me and I was good at what I did." Kate explained her past in the vague terms she was able to.
Gibbs remained silent- his gut was telling him that there was more she needed to purge.
"I didn’t like who I was becoming with Crack and the team, but I didn’t like who I was with the Secret Service either. There I was too soft. Maybe after this I can find a me I like." Kate sighed. "I swear to God, Allah, Buddha, or whoever you believe in that I will end this. Manning will die this time, if it is the last thing I ever do on this Earth. I can’t take any more friends dying for the simple reason that I know them. Anton is worried about how much Manning has changed me and I know you’re worried about me too. There was a time that a direct order was sacred to me. Now, with Manning, I’d kill him even if I received a direct order not to. Anton is more afraid of that change in me than anything else. I don’t really have the words to reassure him other than that only applies in Manning’s case. He has killed far too many innocents to live to be able to kill more. Some people are just born evil, and he is definitely one of those people."