life
So life has been good.
My job is cool. Basically I thought I would work in this one store called Spotlight Souvenirs which is the front store in PKI....well it all depends on the day...because I could either work that store, the other store in the front of the park...or the locker/stroller rental. It's kinda weird tho because so far, everyone I've worked with is younger than me...including my supervisors...there is one guy older than me. And it's just weird having my 'boss' be younger than me...actually I don't really like it at all. Grant it, they are just now graduating high school...but it just seems like I'm ages older than them. And me being evil...I flirt with one of my supes (supervisors)...he's graduating high school this year. But I just couldn't help myself...that's like the only place I'll see a cute guy, so I shamelessly flirted with him. hahaha. no harm done.
So a new thing in my life...youth ministry. I've decided...well God decided. That that's what I'm supposed to do with my life. And I'm going to be planning a young women's retreat that I will lead, at our church. And I'm super excited. I'm helping in the process of transforming our youth ministry.
And I know exactly the reason why I want to be a youth minister...because in all the years that I've been going to our church, I've had so many 'youth ministers' come and go. There was one specific one that I became so vulernable towards and out of nowhere he left the church, mainly because his wife didn't like it. He never even said goodbye. So as a result I've lost trust in people that I should be confiding in. Well, I want to be a youth minister, I want to be THAT person that kids can talk to...I want to be that person that will not leave them. I want to be that person that kids can confide in. And I truly believe that that's what God has made me to be. And this is just awesome that this is happening, and I'm only 19 years old.
And at the same time that's happening, the whole OWU thing is happening. To be honest I'm not sure if I want to go back. Don't get me wrong, I love OWU and the people there...but if I want to be a youth minister, that's not the place I need to be. Maybe I should transfer...maybe I should take a year off or a semester and think about what I should do with my life. At the same time I want to go back to OWU to prove my dad wrong...basically everytime I do something wrong at home, my dad likes to remind me that I failed out of college....which doesn't really help me with how I feel about myself...instead of building me up...he breaks me down. Today my dad cursed when he was talking to me and I asked him nicely not to talk like that...then he just started going off on me and yelling....I just can't handle it anymore. I just need to prove to him that I'm not an idiot. Because right now, that's how he sees me. And I hate that. My parents are supposed to love and support me no matter what I do...and instead he's just breaking me down.
That's the one thing right now that's holding me back...my father.
Other than that.....life is good...I'm working 40+ hours a week and working my butt off when I'm there. I decided that I need to start being a good role model towards people and giving Christians a good name. That's what I am, a Christian and I need to live like it.
My job is cool. Basically I thought I would work in this one store called Spotlight Souvenirs which is the front store in PKI....well it all depends on the day...because I could either work that store, the other store in the front of the park...or the locker/stroller rental. It's kinda weird tho because so far, everyone I've worked with is younger than me...including my supervisors...there is one guy older than me. And it's just weird having my 'boss' be younger than me...actually I don't really like it at all. Grant it, they are just now graduating high school...but it just seems like I'm ages older than them. And me being evil...I flirt with one of my supes (supervisors)...he's graduating high school this year. But I just couldn't help myself...that's like the only place I'll see a cute guy, so I shamelessly flirted with him. hahaha. no harm done.
So a new thing in my life...youth ministry. I've decided...well God decided. That that's what I'm supposed to do with my life. And I'm going to be planning a young women's retreat that I will lead, at our church. And I'm super excited. I'm helping in the process of transforming our youth ministry.
And I know exactly the reason why I want to be a youth minister...because in all the years that I've been going to our church, I've had so many 'youth ministers' come and go. There was one specific one that I became so vulernable towards and out of nowhere he left the church, mainly because his wife didn't like it. He never even said goodbye. So as a result I've lost trust in people that I should be confiding in. Well, I want to be a youth minister, I want to be THAT person that kids can talk to...I want to be that person that will not leave them. I want to be that person that kids can confide in. And I truly believe that that's what God has made me to be. And this is just awesome that this is happening, and I'm only 19 years old.
And at the same time that's happening, the whole OWU thing is happening. To be honest I'm not sure if I want to go back. Don't get me wrong, I love OWU and the people there...but if I want to be a youth minister, that's not the place I need to be. Maybe I should transfer...maybe I should take a year off or a semester and think about what I should do with my life. At the same time I want to go back to OWU to prove my dad wrong...basically everytime I do something wrong at home, my dad likes to remind me that I failed out of college....which doesn't really help me with how I feel about myself...instead of building me up...he breaks me down. Today my dad cursed when he was talking to me and I asked him nicely not to talk like that...then he just started going off on me and yelling....I just can't handle it anymore. I just need to prove to him that I'm not an idiot. Because right now, that's how he sees me. And I hate that. My parents are supposed to love and support me no matter what I do...and instead he's just breaking me down.
That's the one thing right now that's holding me back...my father.
Other than that.....life is good...I'm working 40+ hours a week and working my butt off when I'm there. I decided that I need to start being a good role model towards people and giving Christians a good name. That's what I am, a Christian and I need to live like it.