UGH
Why does this whole college decision thing - SUCK SO BAD! Why can't I just have all the money in the world to go where I want to go! I am trying every possibility ever and it never seems good enough. I can not wait to live ALONE with Mel in our own apartment. I am so tired of high school and every gay person in it! I can not wait til I can just live my life, get old and die. Great way to look at it - huh?! I don't want to go away any more. I don't want to go to Messiah or Eastern. I want to go and just get this whole college crap over with. I don't want to participate in ANY MORE EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! I just want a job so I can have money for my apartment, and to just commute to Stockton so I can get my general courses done, and if in the future I want to transfer I can. But if not I will just graduate there. I just want to move out, and live on my own - go to school and get this stage of my life over with ASAP. That is my decision. END OF COLLEGE CONVERSATION. I don't care at all anymore. I feel like crap. My teeth hurt, and I am so tired of EVERYTHING. Maybe tomorrow I will feel alittle better about the whole situation. lol. Slightly spazamistic at the moment. Just had to get that all out of my system since my mom is driving me insane - plus I HATE NOT HAVING MY WISDOM TEETH. I can't eat anything and IT SUCKS! Not a happy camper - so i am just going to go get everything ready for church tomorrow (where i WILL be happy) and GO TO BED! :(.